Michelle83 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 So I went out with a guy last summer (two dates, one coffee, one dinner). Both went fairly well however there were a few things that kind of put me off with him so I did the fade away and just stopped responding to his texts. Anyway, I've been thinking a bit about him lately and I think I may have judged him a bit too harshly the first time around. Do you think it would be bad to send him a text and see how he is? Or would most guys just write you off after this?
Sunshine87 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 Lol. I hate the fade away. It sometimes leaves the recipient wondering what they did wrong etc. Take your chances. Contact him.
daisybuchanan55 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 Contact him! Some of the best experiences I've had were on the second go-around.
Author Michelle83 Posted June 8, 2013 Author Posted June 8, 2013 Okay, thanks for the thoughts. I guess there's not much to lose by trying so might as well give it a go.
phineas Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 depends on how much time & energy he invested in you. How much phone convo, how much texting, how much did he spend before you blew him off. whatever you do, don't act like nothing happened. Do not act like you didn't blow him off. Do not act like you did nothing wrong. Do not just send him a "hi" text. When a woman blows me off then just contacts me out of the blue & acts like nothing happened, or gives me some BS excuse when I ask her what happened I pretty much tell her to delete my number because as far as i'm concerned she is just bored & will do it again. When a woman blows me off then contacts me with an apology & wants to talk, i'll hear her out. 2
Imajerk17 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 What put you off about him? Sure contact him. Even if he doesn't respond you're still only where you are now and he might actually respond. Meanwhile I hope you realize that the way you handled things was kind of rude and you make it a point to do better than that from now on.
daisybuchanan55 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 I agree about apologizing. That would be very mature and thoughtful of you. If someone gave me a reasonable explanation/apologized for falling off the face of the planet I would really respect that. 1
Casablanca Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 I agree about apologizing. That would be very mature and thoughtful of you. If someone gave me a reasonable explanation/apologized for falling off the face of the planet I would really respect that. Bingo, if a fade away wanted to go back out with me, I'd want to talk about why they faded away first then I would be good. If I just found out they just got out of a relationship or had no good explanation, then I'd go on my way and forget them
Author Michelle83 Posted June 8, 2013 Author Posted June 8, 2013 Thanks again for the replies. This is all understandable. We went on two dates total, one coffee and then one was a dinner date, so he spent maybe like $60 total between the two and there was no phone calling, just some random texting. Some of the off-putting things, it came out that he actually couldn't have kids at all, so that had me iffy. The more I've thought about it though, the more I've realized I would be fine with that. I'm at the point where adoption would be a fine option. The thing that put me off more though, and looking back it was a bit silly, he works away for 2 weeks, then back for one. He texted almost every day he was away for work, and it sounded like we were going to get together - we mentioned things to do but never set firm plans at all. He came back and texted a twice throughout the week, but never mentioned actually getting together then. Mind you, I could have asked him out I suppose instead. I just generally prefer letting the guy do it during the very initial stages. I gave him strong enough signals I thought that he knew I'd say yes. I'm just not sure what reason to give him when apologizing?
scorpio1978 Posted June 8, 2013 Posted June 8, 2013 What got you thinking about him in the first place, just out of curiousity?
Author Michelle83 Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 My brother and I were talking about dating and being picky and what our 'must haves' and he mentioned that I tend to write guys off for little things and I shouldn't...then he brought up this guy and the more I thought about it, after listing off my 'must-haves', he did have all of them. I think I judged him a bit too harshly on a few little things/comments he said. They weren't important things.
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