jolie_baby Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I'm not sure if I should agree to go out with him, ASSUMING he even remembers/asks to set something up for Tuesday. Should I ask him about it - I was thinking I could say "Are you sure about Tuesday, we can push it to later. You seemed sort of hesitant about doing something on the weekend so I just want to be sure. We can do something another time if you prefer." I'm annoyed. I can't tell if he's just trying to play it cool, or if he genuinely doesn't care. Please don't text him that... just go on Tuesday and have fun... 2
BluEyeL Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Even though he seemed indifferent to seeing me on the weekend and only called to make plans after I mentioned it to him? Yeah, just go, and note in your head that he was kinda flaky on the weekend and have low expectations/hopes. Just file that as a data point and observe his behavior. If he constantly makes dates with you, it's good. If he flakes again, then cut him off. 1
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 9, 2013 Author Posted June 9, 2013 Come on, give this guy a break!.. He's just kind of relaxed about the whole thing and you've only been on 3 dates. Wow! This is the epitome of over thinking things! I say just relax and go out with him a couple more times.. IF you can do that without driving yourself insane with over thinking everything that transpires. Ok, ok!!! I admit the tendency to over think everything. I annoy myself sometimes. Haha. Fine. I won't say a thing, ill go and just see what happens. It's just that we've had almost a year of friendship, so I guess I wasn't expecting him to still be sort of lukewarm. And since he brought up the whole "are you looking for something serious" conversation so soon. Letting. It. Go. 1
happykat Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Ok, ok!!! I admit the tendency to over think everything. I annoy myself sometimes. Haha. That's awesome that you can see that in yourself.. I have the same problem sometimes. And I know what you mean about annoying yourself! lol.. Do your best to just enjoy the date and not have any expectations about where this is going or what he's thinking.. good luck! 1
electricjw Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 I think he does like you, but maybe from his point of view, he doesn't want to come off as desperate or clingy. Have yall kissed yet? Was there a spark there or not?? Also I know sometimes guys like being single, not b/c they can sleep with whoever they want, but b/c they like the freedom of being single, and having free time to do whatever. Also since he liked you since you've had a bf, maybe he just doesn't want to go to fast and mess things up, but he is going kinda slow though. But maybe thats his pace. And you said he is the smartest person in class, so maybe he is like you and overthinking things too.
Jon Tenzo Posted June 9, 2013 Posted June 9, 2013 Just curious to know as to when expectations should begin. It's a slippery slope and before you know it he may be texting you saying "Hey I don't know if today's a good day, can we catch up later?" on your wedding day...LOL I mean I guess the issue is I'm typically straightforward no BS type, so it's difficult for me to analyze his intentions.
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 I think he does like you, but maybe from his point of view, he doesn't want to come off as desperate or clingy. Have yall kissed yet? Was there a spark there or not?? Also I know sometimes guys like being single, not b/c they can sleep with whoever they want, but b/c they like the freedom of being single, and having free time to do whatever. Also since he liked you since you've had a bf, maybe he just doesn't want to go to fast and mess things up, but he is going kinda slow though. But maybe thats his pace. And you said he is the smartest person in class, so maybe he is like you and overthinking things too. Yea we've kissed. For me there were definite sparks. I went to his place, and like I said he was a total gentleman...no funny business. We cuddled and kissed, he ordered dinner and put candles out on the table, etc. He was overall a sweet guy. I do sometimes think he might still be concerned about my ex, but who knows. I was just annoyed that he forgot mentioning going out on the weekend, because I was kind of looking forward to it all week whereas he seemed more indifferent to it. Since I thought the feeling was mutual, and since I was looking forward to seeing him, I thought he would be too. But in reality it seemed like he hadn't really thought about it. I'm not sure. I should stop thinking!
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 10, 2013 Author Posted June 10, 2013 Just curious to know as to when expectations should begin. It's a slippery slope and before you know it he may be texting you saying "Hey I don't know if today's a good day, can we catch up later?" on your wedding day...LOL I mean I guess the issue is I'm typically straightforward no BS type, so it's difficult for me to analyze his intentions. RIGHT? I'm so glad you get how I'm feeling about the situation! I'm typically VERY straightforward too. I don't play the "I'm not into you so I'm going to stop responding to your texts/going to make excuses about how I'm busy every single time you want to go out" game. I just say, thanks, you're a very nice person, but I don't think this is working out. END! Why is this so impossible! Haha.
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 11, 2013 Author Posted June 11, 2013 Well, he called me to make plans for both tomorrow night and Saturday night. Lol. I'm just gonna go with it and see what happens! Thanks for the advice guys.
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