Coexist7 Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 (edited) I'm 17 and I talked to guy in college that is 21 for 6mo. We had a lot of issues. He was a manipulative liar, but in a weird way I still cared about him. Like I really may have loved him and I still do, but anyways..We got into a huge blow up, because it seemed like he was using me and pretending to have strong feelings for me, so I blocked him on fb for 3mo. Then after I unblocked him, I could tell from a bunch of his fb pictures and wallposts that something was going on between him and another girl. But I wasn't sure if they were together or not. So we talked as friends for a few wks, then finally we hungout a few days ago. So that night, there a couple times that he kissed me, and then there were times when he looked like he was about to kiss me, but wouldn't, which was awk. But by the end of the night, we ended up having sex. And I felt bad afterwards, but he felt terrible. Then we had a heart to heart conversation for an hour and when I left, everything was fine. We had planned to hangout the next wk. I just saw that he blocked me on fb, and we haven't even spoken since that night. Also, from a friends page, I saw that his new prof. pic was a photo of him and that girl. So to see what was up, I texted him "hey" hours ago, but I got no response. So now I'm honestly hurt, and not because of him and the girl, but at the fact that he no longer wants me in his life. I really care about him, and I could tell when we hung out that he really does too. I'm so confused at the moment. Edited June 7, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator Added Paragraphs
Eddie Edirol Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 He was reminded that he wasnt interested in you anymore after he had sex with you. He doesnt care, and that is obvious by ignoring you and putting the picture on his fb of the new girl. He blocked you because he doesnt want to hear fom you. Maybe he felt telling you to go away wouldnt work. Would you keep bugging him if he said that? Find a new guy.
KatZee Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 He's not into you. He played you. You went over, he got what he wanted from you. And don't kid yourself. He didn't feel "terrible." He was seeing a girl, you came over and gave yourself up, he took it, and then there was no longer any use for you. He's now with this other girl and he doesn't want you interfering. Huge lesson to be learned here. 2
CC12 Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 I really care about him, and I could tell when we hung out that he really does too But you said he's a weird, manipulative liar. From my experience, manipulative liars care more about themselves than anyone else. Other people are toys to them. And someone who cares about you would have a conversation with you if they didn't want to see you anymore, instead of just blocking you on Facebook without a word. That was really cold. I'm sorry you're hurt. It sucks that he did that. On the bright side, there are some lessons to be learned here: Don't date guys who have girlfriends. Don't date guys who lie or manipulate. Don't date guys who aren't that into you. Don't keep trying to talk to guys who have publicly snubbed you. Sometimes it takes years for people to learn these things, but you've been through it already so you'll know for the future not to carry on with jerks. You'll be okay. 2
Author Coexist7 Posted July 10, 2013 Author Posted July 10, 2013 (edited) Okay, harsh? But for the most part you guys are right. Yes, he did play me. And yes, at the time I was too wrapped up in my emotions to see it. But we spent everyday, all day, talking to each other because he was away. I felt attached and had never been in a relationship with anyone before. This was all new, and I so happened to meet a guy that had, (according to his word, who knows if it is true or not ha) slept with 13 ppl and apparently had been engaged twice but got cheated on? Ha. And he was my first kiss, I was 16 at the time and very inexperienced and naive. After a few wk. he requested me on fb, saying that he was going to try to be "civil" w/me. We messaged briefly, but I was like forget that, and he so dumb-founded that I actually had a problem with him. ? So he cancelled his request. But I thanks guys. The situation hurts, but it's all a learning experience! Edited July 10, 2013 by Coexist7
ScaredandConfused85 Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 Ive been there hun. And from sounds of it, he has manipulated and used you. IMO, he is a coward and should be ashamed of himself. All I can say is learn from this. You're still young and there are sadly some men out there who will try and exploit you. Maybe stick to guys in your age range, sometimes older guys like to use younger women. Not saying all older men are like that, but just be wary. I hope you find someone who is mature enough to treat you right! 1
Lansing Posted July 10, 2013 Posted July 10, 2013 At your age, getting involved with a guy in his 20s is probably not a good idea. A 4 year age gap when you get older isn't a big deal but it is at your age. Next time you might want to make it clear what your expectations are before having sex with someone and also make sure they treat you the way you want to be treated (vs. just say pleasant words) 1
sdraw108 Posted July 11, 2013 Posted July 11, 2013 I'm sorry this happened to you and its unfair that an older guy took advantage of you like this. However, next time a 21 year old tells you that he's slept with 13 girls and has been engaged twice, and then tries to get you to sleep with him the first time he meets you (it seemed like you were just FB friends until that point, am I wrong?), your immediate instinct should be "RED FLAG". 1
henderson14 Posted July 11, 2013 Posted July 11, 2013 Funny how clouded our vision becomes when we love someone. You got played, but not really because you knew he was a manipulative liar and you had issues. It's almost funny to read.
Author Coexist7 Posted July 14, 2013 Author Posted July 14, 2013 Yeah I agree, looking back now I find it ridiculous. Its much easier to go by what you feel, rather then what you know. He'd try to make me believe that he cared, by calling and messaging me over and over for days if I didn't pick up. But he's crazy, immature, and likes to play games. So I'm over him.
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