My long distance gf going away for the weekend with her male best friend...

[abalam]

Hi guys, really happy to be part of the forums :-)

 

I have been with my girl for about 6 months now, things happened really really quickly, we fell for eachother practically the first time we met. Since then I have made as much of an effort to see her as much as I can, she lives in student accommodation and I still live at home, so its mostly me travelling to see her. Her city is way more exciting than mine anyway.

 

Whilst in halls, she met a dude who she got on with loads and who she now spends most of her with. I have met this dude and he is a pretty cool guy, we have a mutual respect. He knows about me and my girl. He is also leaving for his home country in a few weeks. My girl told me the other day that she is going to be taking some days off work to go on a weekend away with this dude and his mate. To complicate the situation even more, this mate of his is a guy who my girl had a thing with before she met me. She swears that it was just a physical thing and that there were no feelings involved, but I sort of don't buy that.

 

My question is, how should I feel about my girl going on a weekend away with two guys, both of whom may or may not have feelings for her? I trust her a hell of alot and I truly believe that we are in love, nevertheless the thought of her partying with two dudes whilst in not there makes me feel a little weary.

 

What should I be thinking? Has anyone had this experience before?

 

Thanks in advance for the responses.

[pteromom]

Is there some reason you cannot join them?

 

I am all for women having guy friends, but I find this situation very odd and suspicious. Especially the part about her spending most of her time with him. That's weird to me.

 

Unfortunately you do not have control over what she does or doesn't do... but you do have control over whether you want to be in a relationship where your gf takes off for the weekend to party with two guys.

[abalam]

I'm out of work at the moment, im very low on funds. They are going to a city just outside of where she lives, by the sea, so I really wouldn't be able to join them without being the killjoy who has no money.

 

When I say they spend all their time together, its not always just the two of them, there is usually others, but usually no other girls as that halls is mainly male dominates. There are other girls there that I know of, but she barely speaks to any of them.

[malxme]

It sounds a little unusual, but it doesn't sound like you should be worried. There's nothing you can do anyway, so just wish her a great trip, tell her you'll miss her (she'll likely be too busy to contact sometimes) and just trust her. Most likely she'll miss you and will want to tell you all about it when she gets back.

 

In saying that though, I'd just like to say that if I was her, I'd be really hesitant to put my bf in that situation. Not saying theres anything wrong with a girl having guy friends, but I would certainly not be oblivious to how it might make my bf worried.. But if he's leaving the country and they want to see him off with a fun weekend, you're just gonna have to grin and bare it Im afraid.

[USMCHokie]

She swears that it was is just a physical thing and that there were no feelings involved, but I sort of don't buy that.

 

This sounds worse than if there were feelings involved.

 

My question is, how should I feel about my girl going on a weekend away with two guys...

 

I have mixed feelings about this. To be honest, I don't think she cares what you think. And this is the trouble with distance...there are too many opportunities for instant gratification on either end. I personally don't like it...

 

How old is she....?

[LittleTiger]

If you're not happy about this situation, you need to tell your girlfriend and talk to her about it.

 

If you've already talked, what was her response?