tommyjohn Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 meet this girl who has every quality i look for in a women. when we first met we had a hell of a time and both really connected. she lives an hour away and works full time. im still in college. im 20 and she is 24. we both just got out of 3 yr relationships and haven't rly had anything since those relationships. She says it wont work because of the age and the distance issues, but i just feel like i cant pass this one up. however i cant force anything because it defiantly would not work. I get the feeling that she is more afraid to try than anything. Im the kind of guy who is willing to give most anything a shot because you never know it could be the best thing ever that your passing up. I just do not how to go about it. should i just give up and just cut off ties or still talk to her and play it by ear and maybe she will get more comfortable with it. any advice or past experience with something like this would be great :]
MidwestUSA Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 You can't force someone to like you or go out with you. She has already stated her position. The age difference is more of a factor than distance. Maybe your paths will cross in the future. But for now, let her go.
salparadise Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 Personally, I wouldn't let one hour's distance and 4 years age difference get in the way, but it's really her call. If you're really interested in her, I'd say ask her out and see if she'll accept one date (no further commitment required), and you do the drive. If she does then perhaps you'll win her over in time. The danger obviously being that she might end it after you start having strong feelings. If she refuses to do one date at a time then quit communicating. Nothing worse than being stuck in her sphere when there's no potential for it to go anywhere.
Phantom888 Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 Personally, I wouldn't let one hour's distance and 4 years age difference get in the way, but it's really her call. If you're really interested in her, I'd say ask her out and see if she'll accept one date (no further commitment required), and you do the drive. If she does then perhaps you'll win her over in time. The danger obviously being that she might end it after you start having strong feelings. If she refuses to do one date at a time then quit communicating. Nothing worse than being stuck in her sphere when there's no potential for it to go anywhere. That's not a big age gap, and definitely not a big distance gap. If you have feelings for each other, you should go for it.
MidwestUSA Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 Well, okay, I can be convinced by the LS faithfuls to change my mind! If you think she's simply afraid, and not dead set against it, bridge the distance, show her your persistence and maturity, and see what happens. (My 35 year old niece just married a 20 year old, LOL! Waiting to see how that goes!). Good luck to you.
Author tommyjohn Posted June 5, 2013 Author Posted June 5, 2013 Thanks for all the advice. I'm gonna give her a few days to "calm" down kind of thing. Cause I feel that and hour and 4 yrs isn't that bad. But you can't force someone to change. Anymore advice would be great!
Jon Tenzo Posted June 6, 2013 Posted June 6, 2013 Play it by ear, I'd say if she doesn't give on in about a month or so then give up.
apple OR orange Posted June 6, 2013 Posted June 6, 2013 you was a fun bit of sex for her, nice safe distance so she doesnt have to worry about you driving up to see her all the time....
tbf Posted June 6, 2013 Posted June 6, 2013 She says it wont work because of the age and the distance issuesMy advice would be to listen and back off, while maintaining light, friendly contact without any expectations. Flirt a bit with her here and there, to build sexual tension but don't push for anything further.
salparadise Posted June 6, 2013 Posted June 6, 2013 My advice would be to listen and back off, while maintaining light, friendly contact without any expectations. Flirt a bit with her here and there, to build sexual tension but don't push for anything further. Why? Seems like what she wants, but how does that advance OPs position. He's not seeking membership status in her fan club. He's had a taste and wants some more. If she's not reciprocating then he should just move on. Sniffing around for scraps on the floor while someone else is feasting at the table is a loser's game.
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