aussie sam Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 This thread isn't really a question as such but I would love to hear your comments, advice and questions! Some of you may remember the thread I started a couple of weeks ago about the German girl who I saw 3 times but always in a group situation (partly my fault but mostly hers ). I have been walking on egg shells around this one. Mostly because the dating and mating culture is different here (amongst Germans) and I don't want to break any taboos before I know them. (eg. it is generally considered rude for a guy to go up to a girl and start talking to her ) This post if full of generalizations but, they represent my experiences here and I am actually intrigued by this different world of dating etiquette. I decided to leave it be after the last group date and not actively pursue anything. So a few days ago she invited me to hang out with her in the park. I wanted make sure this wasn't another group thing so I accepted but told her I could only make it on Tuesday (If it was a group thing then she would have to tell me that she has to ask her friends if they can make it then.) Anyways it was just us and it was… nice. It was pretty much our first date. We walked around the city and talked and got ice-cream and stuff and it wasn't awkward. The conversation didn't get too deep (as per protocol here) but I had fun and it seems like she did too. I thought about kissing her or getting closer, but I'm unsure now of what that will mean to her. my 1 year relationship ended about 6 months ago, I have just had 4 one night stands since then. 2 were friends, and 2 were friends of friends but it was outlined at the start that I wasn't looking for much more and they were all happy with that. I still don't feel ready for a proper relationship, but I would be happy with something in between or even just to keep seeing this girl but taking it slow. The problem is that Germans are generally quite reserved with their emotions (but not their opinions) until they know someone really well. I feel like this girl is in to me but at the same time when I test the waters with flirting or going a little deeper then she doesn't really match me, but doesn't push me away either. It's common knowledge here that Germans don't (and don't know how to) flirt, so that makes it harder for me to know what she want's out of this. When we text and email she uses a lot of smily/winky emoticons and stuff but it's just practical talk about where we are meeting etc. This girl is stunning! like really beautiful and seems confident and independent, but I'm not entirely sure I see anything long term with us since our cultures are so different.
Roadkill007 Posted June 5, 2013 Posted June 5, 2013 dating someone of another culture simply means there's more to learn about her . As long as you're both open minded and communicate well, I don't think a cultural difference necessarily makes a LTR with her impossible. Although the thing with cultural differences is that there IS a bit of "comfort" in dating someone who has the same cultural background. But besides that, you can pretty much make up for all the other differences. 1
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