A1A Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 Let me start by saying that I am Still in pain, still crying, still missing him, and still thinking of him. But if I could measure the pain level from 1 – 10 it was 9.9 in the first month and now it is under 5. Yes I am still crying almost every day, but it is only when I wake up or before I go to sleep and it doesn’t last for more than few seconds and my pillow stays dry; only few tears when he’s coming into my thoughts at those quite moments. I let myself admit that I miss him only because it has been 6 months and although he tried to see me, I refused and I tried my best to have a complete no contact with him. So on one hand I still miss him because the last time I saw him I was still in love with him and I miss that feeling, but on the other hand I got used to not seeing him, not hearing him, and having other things that make me happy… so I am not sure that I miss HIM (the person). I hate to admit how much I still think of him. I AM keeping myself busy with other stuff, and I AM trying to think of other things but believe me I can’t control it. He is in my thoughts most of the day. At the beginning I was stressing out that after three months I am not over him, but some of you helped me a lot and advised me to give it time and it doesn’t matter if it takes a week or a year, just let the time heal me. Now; six months later, I am NOT stressing out anymore because I can really see that my situation is improving, but I do wish that I could think of him less… It will come one day. One last thing, and this is where I need your help (again)… My self-esteem; I know it is stupid to feel like that but the truth is that since the breakup I feel ugly. I never felt this way in my life. I was never the model type but I sure was feeling beautiful inside out and carried myself this way. Now my inside is broke and it affects the way I fell about my outside How can I fix that?
Chi townD Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 I see your problem already. You're in NC, which is good, but NC isn't enough. You need to be making positive changes in your life in conjunction with NC. Easy positive changes to help your self esteem. Buy new clothes. Change your wardrobe, make and effort to look smoking hot everyday. And get a new hairstyle. Something people will notice and like. People will start to say, "Damn girl! You look awesome!" That's going to help with your self esteem. Eating healthy and get plenty of sleep. Join a gym and GO!!!! Run your little ass off on the treadmill and push some weight. Join a zumba class or a spin class. Work off the stress and frustrations that you're having and PLUS, you'll be working on that rock hard sexy bod. Then, you'll notice guys at the gym sneaking a quick peek at your butt in those Yoga pants as you walk by. You'll think to yourself, "God, what a pervert!" But, you'll be calling him a pervert with a smile on your face! That's going to help your self esteem as well! 6
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