The Shepherd Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 Go knowingly into it and take advantage of her and play victim. Nice. When you already knew she was looking for a relationship and you are not willing to give it to her, why did you sleep with her? 2
carhill Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 OP, do you see any similarities between this young lady and your ex who ended up flirting with other men in front of you while you were together? I ask because you mentioned 'crazy' in both recounts. My read is you're still getting over your prior relationship and some of these issues are risks of that process. You could avoid some of it by taking 'alone time' and working through things, but you've chosen to remain engaged sexually and/or emotionally with women during this process, so that entails risks and consequences. You have choices. Where does it go from here? 2
todreaminblue Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 nice one....people telling you to not stick your dick in crazy....... thsi si what i believe.... dont stick your dick in anything (crazy or "normal") unless you know them really well.......and if you do stick your dick in......and find out she has mental issues ...how about ....honesty and own your mistake.....something like this..... I shouldn't have used you for sex..I am sorry for my lack of control I thoroughly regret us having sex....I am not interested in you whatsoever in fact continuing communication with you is troubling me.......i wasn't interested and still am not interested in a relationship with you, even if you are pregnant by me which i highly doubt you are........i will not be continuing a relationship sexual or other wise with you......please don't contact me again i will not reply I wish you happiness in your life....good luck.....sign your name........ 1
Author calgary Posted June 12, 2013 Author Posted June 12, 2013 thank you everyone, and fair play. I shouldn't have slept with her. Yes I've chosen to remain sexually active. I broke up with my ex 6 months ago.. my friends convinced me the best way to get over one girl is to get under others.. she was interested. I got drunk I thought it might help. it didn't. lesson learnt. why would she only tell me today she was 10 days late? we had sex on the 24th. so she should be able to test now right ? yeah I feel like I've had alone time for long enough. i'm back to myself. I just didn't want a relationship.. it was sex. i'd be surprised if you guys could have turned it down with her and admire you for it. you're obviously all better men than me. I've learnt from my mistake. but maybe it's too late? I think she's faking though. to be honest I really don't want to go over to her house I don't ever want to see her again..
Balzac Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 why would she only tell me today she was 10 days late? we had sex on the 24th. so she should be able to test now right ? The ONLY reason for a girl to make the above statement is drama. Add to that she's a functional moron who cannot do simple math. What I don't get is why you're talking w her about anything.
todreaminblue Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 thank you everyone, and fair play. I shouldn't have slept with her. Yes I've chosen to remain sexually active. I broke up with my ex 6 months ago.. my friends convinced me the best way to get over one girl is to get under others.. she was interested. I got drunk I thought it might help. it didn't. lesson learnt. why would she only tell me today she was 10 days late? we had sex on the 24th. so she should be able to test now right ? yeah I feel like I've had alone time for long enough. i'm back to myself. I just didn't want a relationship.. it was sex. i'd be surprised if you guys could have turned it down with her and admire you for it. you're obviously all better men than me. I've learnt from my mistake. but maybe it's too late? I think she's faking though. to be honest I really don't want to go over to her house I don't ever want to see her again.. i think you just have to be blunt...obviously this woman is unstable and not in control......but you are stable...so be stable and do the right thing.....don't go visit her, you dont have to....you do have to be honest with her....leave no ambiguity in your last contact.....make it over...dont answer her if she replies...she will move on..... the way the other men have said dont stick your dick in crazy has disgusted me actually.....like its ok to stick your dick in normal......and use a woman ...if she is mentally sound...women are not vehicles for penises.women have feelings and get hurt...treating crazy people with disdain.....and disregard......and that is supposedly normal behavior to put down a woman who is unstable .. and you admire them...kudos...i just dont feel any admiration what so ever ...deb
The Shepherd Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 I think you need a new set of friends. I know you need to drop at least one of them. I find them quite thoughtless. 1
FitChick Posted June 12, 2013 Posted June 12, 2013 I shouldn't have slept with her. Yes I've chosen to remain sexually active. . i'm back to myself. I just didn't want a relationship.. it was sex. I've learnt from my mistake. but maybe it's too late? To avoid dramas like this, get a vasectomy. It's cheaper than paying child support for eighteen years, isn't it? No woman will be able to blackmail you and you will sleep better at night. 1
veggirl Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Go knowingly into it and take advantage of her and play victim. Nice. When you already knew she was looking for a relationship and you are not willing to give it to her, why did you sleep with her? You could also say why did she have sex with him knowing he wasn't interested? She did this to herself. Op the preg scare is likely a lie. Anyone over age 13 knows you can take a preg test at TEN DAYS LATE. She just wants attention. It's sad and pathetic. Go over there w a preg test or ask her NOW why she hasn't taken one. Quit being so retardedly gullible about when she can take one, geez.
veggirl Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 (edited) i think you just have to be blunt...obviously this woman is unstable and not in control......but you are stable...so be stable and do the right thing.....don't go visit her, you dont have to....you do have to be honest with her....leave no ambiguity in your last contact.....make it over...dont answer her if she replies...she will move on..... the way the other men have said dont stick your dick in crazy has disgusted me actually.....like its ok to stick your dick in normal......and use a woman ...if she is mentally sound...women are not vehicles for penises.women have feelings and get hurt...treating crazy people with disdain.....and disregard......and that is supposedly normal behavior to put down a woman who is unstable .. and you admire them...kudos...i just dont feel any admiration what so ever ...deb Women are also smart enough to realize a guy who ignores your texts etc is NOT into you and if a woman gives sex to a guy like that...that's on her. Saying this chick was used makes her sound stupid. I'm sure she's not. She knew she was fking a guy who didnt like her. She wasn't used, she tried to use sex to win over a guy who clearly didnt dig her. There is no basis to legit call her mentally unstable. Most likely she's a typical insecure young 20s girl...it's not like op broke into the state mental ward and started trolling the halls. She did this willingly hoping sex would win him over. Edited June 13, 2013 by veggirl 2
dasein Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 (edited) She knew she was fking a guy who didnt like her. She wasn't used, she tried to use sex to win over a guy who clearly didnt dig her. Agree, and actually respect that she made a proactive plan to try to turn things around on second thought. Then the preg stuff and the multitexts and weirdness. But up to there, she was just someone like any other person who knew what she wanted, set out to get it, took risk and action. Women are allowed to do that without being painted as eternal victims or babies preyed on by male predators when things don't turn out as they want. Viewing women as helpless incompetents and ingenues in these types of threads is what is insulting. Other than the preg manipulation stalky stuff, there aren't really any wrongdoers in this story, and as you say, that's not really a big deal either, certainly not a sign of mental issues... turnoff of course, probably not mental. I can't count the number of female... and male friends of mine who got a hot crush and call up sobbing and running all over town trying to find the unrequitted love. They are usuallly fine and dandy in a couple days. I remember one of my friends was dating a psychiatrist, who got it bad and would call my house blubbering away, "where is X? waaaaahhhhhwaah, where is X? He hasn't caaaaaaaaalllleeeed!" Full on bawling cryface (thank goodness I couldn't see it) "ahuuhuuuahuuuaaaawaaaaaaaa!"... psychiatrist. She was just fine later but wouldn't look me in the eye for awhile. Have been that way myself long ago, but suppose could get that way even today under the right circumstances. It means we are humans, not machines. Edited June 13, 2013 by dasein 2
The Shepherd Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 veggirl, you are one of the smarter and more balanced women posters over here and I admire you for that. Honestly, I do not know what else to say here except I believe that people are not supposed to behave like predators and I think he and his friends were in a better position to make decisions in this situation. I think he should have made it very clear to her that he doesn't want a relationship with her before sleeping with her.
shexy Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 We get that she's crazy. You can do one of two things - keep playing her game and keep answering her texts and stuff. Or, take advantage of the one-time-for-free phone number change most wireless companies allow, change your number, and BOOM problem solved. She's NOT pregnant, I'll bet on it.
shexy Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 veggirl, you are one of the smarter and more balanced women posters over here and I admire you for that. Hmmmm, why do I suddenly feel stupid and unbalanced
SJC2008 Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 So let me get this strait. This woman asks a guy out for drinks, asks him out again and he blows her off. Then she says he's like all other men and is just after sex, invites him to a party and starts flirting with him, they have sex and SHE'S the victim? How about this?: She's batshyt crazy, he knew it and is now reaping the consequences! Lesson learned. Everyone happy?
Estate Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Look.... not trying to be the moral police here but... Yes, we all know the BEST solution would have been to not go there and meet her in the first place. We can harp and harp and harp at the OP about it but at the end of the day, yes, guys are guys... if it's offered on a plate then guys will cave. So while we can be the moral police all day, it's not really the point of this thread. Just because he accepted HER advances when he knew it might not be a good idea doesn't mean he deserves this situation... so can we keep it on track and try to offer advice on the actual situation. So OP, I had an ex who pulled this on me, she was very unstable, constant suicide threats when I tried to break up with her. When I finally held my guns and went through with it she had several "life threatening illnesses" and then that turned into it just being side effects of .... you guessed it! She was pregnant. I knew should couldn't have been, we hadn't slept together for more 2-3 months at the end things were so horrible but I couldn't get out. The she came up with a story about how she was actually 3-4 months pregnant but wasn't eating to stay thin... then had an abortion... then said that was a lie... then had a miscarriage... then said that was a lie... This whole time she was stalking me everywhere and my Mom too... Basically, it was so insane we went to the police... even no contact just made her worse. You're entitled to send a text as someone else said... tell her she couldn't be pregnant by you and that you are not interested... but expect her to only get worse... So cut contact... if she gets worse to the point it actually IS stalking.... go to the police and explain the situation.... All you have to do is sit down with them and tell them you had sex with her, that she is threatening pregnancy and is harassing you. Explain that if she WAS pregnant that you would be responsible but you do not feel that she is and that she appears unstable and cannot deal with her. If she is confronted with some authority she will have to come clean. This is an extreme measure but if she does not stop or this becomes unbareable harassment then you are entitled to seek help.
The Shepherd Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Hmmmm, why do I suddenly feel stupid and unbalanced I have no idea. You tell us.
Author calgary Posted June 13, 2013 Author Posted June 13, 2013 thanks again everyone I appreciate it. I think the reason I started the thread was, I wanted other peoples opinions on the pregnancy scare.. and it seems the majority of you don't believe she's pregnant at all and that she is actually just using that as some weird way of making me stay in contact.. even though im not she's still texting me.. I suppose she dumped her boyfriend.. her friends took her boyfriends side.. and then I abandoned her.. but I never asked her to dump her boyfriend or told her I liked her... she lived with him and everything.. I would never dump a girl I lived with for years, to be with somebody I just met for drinks once. I wont reply to her. I think the only way i'd reply to her, is if I could say something that would magically make her turn around and admit she's not pregnant just for my own peace of mind.. I've learnt a valuable lesson and i'll feel lucky to walk away from this without a pregnant, obsessive girl after me.
Balzac Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 To be clear / she may very well be pregnant but statistically it's improbable that's it by your seed. Think of it that way. It's not a question of pregnant or not. It's that you followed a prevention plan.
todreaminblue Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Women are also smart enough to realize a guy who ignores your texts etc is NOT into you and if a woman gives sex to a guy like that...that's on her. Saying this chick was used makes her sound stupid. I'm sure she's not. She knew she was fking a guy who didnt like her. She wasn't used, she tried to use sex to win over a guy who clearly didnt dig her. There is no basis to legit call her mentally unstable. Most likely she's a typical insecure young 20s girl...it's not like op broke into the state mental ward and started trolling the halls. She did this willingly hoping sex would win him over. i took the basis for calling her mentally unstable to be from the op himself...... the opening line of the ops post.... crazy crazy girl I need help getting rid of! then the posts saying dont you know not to stick your dick in crazy.....those are the posts i am referring to..... i guess none of us on loveshack know her mental state.......we can only assume from one side of the story......so there's no basis for legit assumption unless of course we know her personally...... what other reason does the op i have i wonder for having sex with her.......other than to use her for sex, because he wanted to have sex...how do you know that she knew he didnt like her????? the op took responisbility for his mistake....he admits it was a mistake for him to have sex with her.....or he wouldn't have learned anything..at least he admits it..dont understand why you are placing all the responsibility on to.... as you put ...........an insecure 20 something girl....why is she insecure in your mind..you dont know her.......because she allowed herself to be used for sex?....or is she as the op himself put a crazy crazy girl.....i didnt coin that first line...that on him....not my assumption...i simply replied to that assumption.....................deb
HoneyBadgerDontCare Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 There are a lot of haters here, OP. Props for banging the hot girl. Most guys here would have too (and most girls here would have banged the equally crazy, douchebag, good-looking guy). So don't pay attention to their moral high ground. It's all BS. Anyway, have you considered just changing your number?
The Shepherd Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 thanks again everyone I appreciate it. I think the reason I started the thread was, I wanted other peoples opinions on the pregnancy scare.. and it seems the majority of you don't believe she's pregnant at all and that she is actually just using that as some weird way of making me stay in contact.. even though im not she's still texting me.. I suppose she dumped her boyfriend.. her friends took her boyfriends side.. and then I abandoned her.. but I never asked her to dump her boyfriend or told her I liked her... she lived with him and everything.. I would never dump a girl I lived with for years, to be with somebody I just met for drinks once. I wont reply to her. I think the only way i'd reply to her, is if I could say something that would magically make her turn around and admit she's not pregnant just for my own peace of mind.. I've learnt a valuable lesson and i'll feel lucky to walk away from this without a pregnant, obsessive girl after me. calgary, I too don't think that that girl is pregnant by you if at all she is pregnant. She could just be harassing you out of desperation and frustration. I advise you again to lose the entire set of people that put you in this situation, especially those that knew the girl very well. Report anyone to the cops that harasses you. I hope you learnt your lesson for real and for life. 2
sillyanswer Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 Free beer and food seduced you? Who are you hommer simpson? The way to a man's heart is though his stomach? Anyway, the thread starter shouldn't do nothing and hope she'll go away. Any of the other suggestions are better, from blocking her number, changing his number, going to see her with a pregnancy test kit in his hand etc. She might be pregnant (!) but it might be by her recently dumped bf, but I'm guessing not.
Eternal Sunshine Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 The Homer Simpson comment made me lol But anyway, OP got what he deserved. This girl clearly showed signs of being emotionally unstable and overly attached BEFORE sex. Any man over the age of 13 should know that women generally only get more attached and more emotional AFTER sex. Which is exactly what happened. 1
dasein Posted June 13, 2013 Posted June 13, 2013 what other reason does the op i have i wonder for having sex with her.......other than to use her for sex, because he wanted to have sex...how do you know that she knew he didnt like her????? The notion that women who freely engage in consensual sex, sex that they desire and even initiate or encourage, have been "used" for sex by a man when more dates or a relationship don't result needs to -go- yesterday. The year is 2013. 4
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