Dancegirl1 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 Okay this is long but I need advice to my situation so I did details. It's been a little more than a month and it's still hard. It's hard to believe he's someone I just knew now. We dated for 15 months and we broke up because he said he wasn't ready/mature for a relationship. He said he won't want one for awhile and doesn't know when he will. It could be until later on in college. He just couldn't handle it anymore. He's 17 and I'm 18. I fell for a boy when I needed a man. :/ I should've ended it awhile ago but didn't because I liked him a lot and he made me happy. He was always too busy for me (now he's not) and barely had time to talk or see me. He made me think we had potential so I held on. He didn't know what he was doing and I mostly led the relationship. I went above and beyond for him when he just sat back. He never went out of his way for me and I made all the effort. He told me he was a bad bf and won't be ready to date until college. So I think he was sparing me the hurt because he knew I'd stay with him even if he was too busy for me or couldn't give me what I needed. He was gonna go away all summer and I got told he didn't want to do that to me even tho we agreed we'd stick through it. But now he's not going away.. Now he's a different guy and he's trying to be outgoing when he was introverted while we dated. He avoids me and is kind of jerky to me when he's nice to everyone else. He moved on fast because he liked someone right after we broke up and he flirted with her in front of me. Idk if that's cause he thought I was flirting with guys a week after we broke up. I wasn't..He told his sister that made him upset because he then thought I didn't like him while we dated? He blocked me from his facebook friend list and likes everything of that girl. Idk how he could just get over me so fast! Idk if he's trying to be outgoing to forget about me and gain friends or what. He's like trying to be the opposite of who he used to be. But I know I shouldn't care anymore. He has great morals and everything I looked for in a guy but just wasn't a good bf. Now it's hard to make him a stranger. I never wanted him to become a memory and it's just so weird not having him mine and thinking of how important he once was to me. I see him at my church a lot and it's weird with not having our routine together. It's hard to see him especially because he's not going away all summer anymore and I'm best friends with his sister.. I think back to our greatest moments and just want to cry. We like grew up together and had the best times. We were great together minus the hard stuff. I think he couldn't take us as serious as I did because he wasn't developed yet. I miss the old us and it sucks it'll never be the same. How can I let go off the anger and feelings towards him? Some days it's easy and others it's hard. He used to be crazy about me epically in the beginning but I guess that changed within in a month. Advice?
HopelessRomantick Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 Hi DanceGirl1, I am sorry for your sadness and struggle. I don't know what to say except that it does get better with time. I was in love with whom I believe is my soulmate. I loved and still love her unconditionally despite the pain and heartache she has caused. She broke up with me after a 3yr LDR back in July. And I think that because it was an LDR and lacked certain aspects of a traditional relationship it has made it more difficult to move on. However, I had moved on after many months of anguish and depression, not completely but I made progress. Up until last night of course. I called her because we incurred some debt together and I need her help to pay it back. I wasn't going to ask her help but I'm in financial hardship as a result. After hearing her voice [which I feared beforehand because I knew it would stir up emotions] I am now miserable again. I guess what I am trying to tell you is what I said before, it does get better and now that I am having a relapse of emotions since last night I'm noticing it is a bit easier to refocus my thoughts on something else and get on with my day. Hope this gives you some inspiration. 1
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