nick01675 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 I been in NC for more than 3 months and was doing well. I broke up with her 4 months back.. Today when i had gone to gym I met this random guy and started chatting to him about workouts and stuff. All of sudden he started talking about my ex. Yes!! about my ex. We were talking about psychology and He is a psychology major and even she is pursuing major in psychology (he told i know a girl her name is **** and she is doing...) He knew her and it seems they are parting together (she has a big group now). I mean a random guy knows her!!! I never thought that guy knew her. Crap!! I was avoiding all my mutual friends so that they don't update me with her news now I don't from where this guy came and he is talking about her. I'am doing a lot to avoid her news and updates and I don't understand why god sends some random people and tell about her. I hate my life...
BustedUpInside Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 Isn't life cruel sometimes? It seems so unfair that you are working so hard and then someone randomly brings your ex up and tells you all sorts of details that you would rather not know. I know it hurts, but don't let it take away from your recovery. You are doing just fine, and you shouldn't let this little setback take away from that. Keep moving forward and try to have a better today than yesterday! 1
mtnbiker3000 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 I been in NC for more than 3 months and was doing well. I broke up with her 4 months back.. Today when i had gone to gym I met this random guy and started chatting to him about workouts and stuff. All of sudden he started talking about my ex. Yes!! about my ex. We were talking about psychology and He is a psychology major and even she is pursuing major in psychology (he told i know a girl her name is **** and she is doing...) He knew her and it seems they are parting together (she has a big group now). I mean a random guy knows her!!! I never thought that guy knew her. Crap!! I was avoiding all my mutual friends so that they don't update me with her news now I don't from where this guy came and he is talking about her. I'am doing a lot to avoid her news and updates and I don't understand why god sends some random people and tell about her. I hate my life... Just a bump in the cosmic road... Try to forget about it. And props to you for doing everything in your power to keep her out of your life. Exactly what I am doing also. Don't know where her new place is. Don't check FB. Don't call call/text/email. Nothing. It's the only way for me... You and I are about the same spot too. Almost 3 months NC and almost 4 months since BU for me... So hard right now. Up, down, back and fourth... Hope I am nearing a turning point soon. How about you? Is getting any easier? 1
Author nick01675 Posted June 4, 2013 Author Posted June 4, 2013 Isn't life cruel sometimes? It seems so unfair that you are working so hard and then someone randomly brings your ex up and tells you all sorts of details that you would rather not know. I know it hurts, but don't let it take away from your recovery. You are doing just fine, and you shouldn't let this little setback take away from that. Keep moving forward and try to have a better today than yesterday! Yes it is cruel. I'm trying almost everything so that i don't relapse, but no luck sometimes i feel that there is manhole in the dark tunnel (I know I'm taking things in a negative way but ill be fine)
Author nick01675 Posted June 4, 2013 Author Posted June 4, 2013 Just a bump in the cosmic road... Try to forget about it. And props to you for doing everything in your power to keep her out of your life. Exactly what I am doing also. Don't know where her new place is. Don't check FB. Don't call call/text/email. Nothing. It's the only way for me... You and I are about the same spot too. Almost 3 months NC and almost 4 months since BU for me... So hard right now. Up, down, back and fourth... Hope I am nearing a turning point soon. How about you? Is getting any easier? It was getting easier till i saw that guy.. Now I don't miss her, last couple of months she used to pass my mind but day by day her memories were reducing, but rite now i feel irritated and angry she is like a ghost who is just following and not letting me have a peaceful life 1
KPChick000 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 I'm almost at the same spot as you. Broken up for about four months, two months no direct contact. Avoiding any information from other sources has always been a struggle because the ex and I have many mutual friends. I've blocked all of them from fb and I'm trying hard not to succumb to temptation. One good thing is that I live in a different city from them. This is just a little step backwards for you. Keep on trucking along on your NC journey. It sucks that it happened and opened the floodgates a crack, but now do damage control and close them. Let the thoughts pass and try not to dwell!
mtnbiker3000 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 It was getting easier till i saw that guy.. Now I don't miss her, last couple of months she used to pass my mind but day by day her memories were reducing, but rite now i feel irritated and angry she is like a ghost who is just following and not letting me have a peaceful life Oh, I guess I am much worse than you as I still think about her daily. Every day!! Miss her. Miss us. Over analyze. Over think... Just basically spin around in circles. Feel pretty much the same as I did a week ago. A month ago. Two months ago. I think I am too close to it to see any improvement. Got to believe there is some. I hope... 2
BustedUpInside Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 Oh, I guess I am much worse than you as I still think about her daily. Every day!! Miss her. Miss us. Over analyze. Over think... Just basically spin around in circles. Feel pretty much the same as I did a week ago. A month ago. Two months ago. I think I am too close to it to see any improvement. Got to believe there is some. I hope... I think you are too close. I don't even know you and I can tell just from your posts that you are getting a lot better. You should re-read everything and you will be able to see how different you have become in just a couple of months to the OP, small setbacks really make you question your progress, but just trust in the fact that you are doing the right thing, and you will get over this small hump, and be right back to normal in no time.
mtnbiker3000 Posted June 4, 2013 Posted June 4, 2013 I think you are too close. I don't even know you and I can tell just from your posts that you are getting a lot better. You should re-read everything and you will be able to see how different you have become in just a couple of months Thanks BUI. I think it helps hearing from an outside observer. Right now, the hardest things I am dealing with are (1) the rejection. And (2) how much our RS changed from beginning to end. It was like two separate RS's. I just don't get how someone can feel so strong in one direction, and within a relatively short time (3 years) feel literally, the opposite. Just baffling. And makes me very nervous about any future RS that seems to start so well. Because who knows, right? Obviously, people can and do change... Very scary It's like my therapist said, the things that initially attract you, will end up being the same things that you despise later in the RS. Well that just plain sucks!! PS. Sorry for yet another Threadjack 1
Author nick01675 Posted June 5, 2013 Author Posted June 5, 2013 Sorry I need to vent. I think its a relapse for me .. Its as if I broke NC.. I don't know whom to blame but yeah I could have stopped that guy when he was telling about her. I mean I was curious to know about her but maybe be I would've told him "BRO stop I DON'T WANT HER UPDATES". But i wasn't strong enough to do that. That guy had lot of information about her and what she was doing for the past couple of months. It kills me when I came to know some random guys knows her I mean was she so desperate? When she came into my life same time last year she had just few friends when she was with me I treated her very nicely and initial months she was very close to me. When she started making new friends and groups she started becoming cold.. Due to this fights started (I caught her red handed with Flirt text message with some dude twice). When she found that she can survive without me as she made lot of friends she wanted to breakup. After every fight she used to tell lets break up.. Fights were because 1 . She was cold. 2 She used to tell "On the scale of 10 your love towards me is 8 and my love toward you is just 6 i'm trying to reach there but these fights are stopping me" 3 She used tell that she will lie and she cant promise that she will be truthful always but those lies wouldn't harm you. 4 She has nothing to talk me as we communicate daily so nothing new its all the same thats happening in her life and our calls would last for 5 to 10 mins and she will be on her phone watsapp till 1 am .. I dont understand what she is talking to them. She is fake and she cries everytime. She was with me as I had money and because of my lifestyle, she wasn't in love with me. when she found a new group I was dropped. If she was a human being or she had little feeling towards me she wouldn't have gone for the party the same day when we broke up. I feel miserable now feel like I'm betrayed and feels crap when we realize it was fake love which she had toward me. Sorry for the long post. I have just LS to vent as you guys are the one who is listening now.. Even god has shut his ears. Shall I consider this as Day 1 NC???
Author nick01675 Posted June 5, 2013 Author Posted June 5, 2013 Is this closure?? As now I know that she is Fake and she was suffering from G.I.G.S ??
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