babybear Posted October 7, 2004 Posted October 7, 2004 I posted this before...but I'm not sure it worked, so I apologize if you read this twice. K, here's why I'm so confused. Last nite I had drinks with somebody I used to date. The relationship was always pretty casual (though he's a wonderful guy and a good friend), and just recently after I broke up with my bf, he and I started to sleep together from time to time once again. He has a gf now, someone he just met about 3 months ago, the time that he and I stopped messing around. So, he asks me if I want to go get a drink around 11:30PM. I asked him if his gf would mind, and am wondering if any of you would mind if your bf was going to get drinks with a girl around midnite. So we go there, and are chatting and having a great time...and then he got sorta cuddly. He would put his arms around me, and I hugged him back a little, but not too much. Also, he would kiss me on the cheek. At one point, we were about to kiss, but he sort of pulled back, and after that, I made sure we had some distance between us. At the end of the nite he offers to walk me home, and comes up to my apartment. He was going to sleep on the couch, but he's tall and the couch is small, so he shared my bed. I have a large queen size. So, NOTHING at all happened. I slept on one side, he on the other...which was kind of odd to have to do with someone you've had sex with. But I had to be respectful of the situation. I got up around 7 and went to work while he was still sleeping. So, nothing really happened...but I'm sort of confused by his actions. I felt like he was really friendly for someone with a gf, and I'm wondering if sleeping in my bed was appropriate for a guy with a gf to do. Honestly, I felt like if I had pushed it, I coulda kissed him, but that would just suck. I know that I am not completely over the feelings I have had for him in the past, and last nite i felt like he was not either. at the same time, i'm wondering if this is normal behavior to have when you're with an ex. He's so used to being affectionate wiht me, that maybe this wasn't out of the ordinary? any input? babybear
Jilly10340 Posted October 7, 2004 Posted October 7, 2004 NO, sleeping in the same bed with another girl when you have a girlfriend is NOT appropriate for a guy to do. If I was his gf I would drop him so fast. I mean, going out for drinks in the wee hours of the night is one thing but sleeping in the same bed when the floor or couch (I don't care if it's too small) is crossing the line. No, it's not out of the ordinary for someone to be affectionate towards you when you're together or you're both single, it is out of the ordinary for someone to be affectionate towards you when they are with someone other then you. Are you sure he's going out with this girl still? Maybe they broke up?
Papillon Posted October 7, 2004 Posted October 7, 2004 Yes, it's not appropriate in the least. Your history together will create a comfortable atmosphere, but because he's involved, sleeping in the same bed with you should not even enter his mind at all. If he's tall enough to find the couch to small, then his legs are long enough to take him straight back home.
sweetpea01 Posted October 7, 2004 Posted October 7, 2004 Maybe he's dating (AKA sleeping with) this other girl, and isn't totally committed to her, so that's why he's still being so touchy feely. Did he specifically say he had a serious gf? Sweetpea
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