starrynightz45 Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 I've asked about this guy before, but he continues to confuse me. Basically, I met him in college in August, he asked for my number in February, and we started dating in early May. We've been on 3 dates so far. Just yesterday, I was invited over to his house. He was a complete gentleman, we had dinner, cuddled, and watched movies. He seems to be a somewhat negative person, and has a LONG list of dislikes. I joked that he hated me yesterday, and he said "I never hated you!." Today, I joked thru text that I was a horrible person for not exercising today and he responded on a text "I agree, you're a horrible person." When I responded saying "I knew u hated me all along!!," his response was "herp derp." I know I'm probably being too sensitive, BUT I feel like his response was a tad childish, and that at this point he should be able to admit that he at least enjoys my company. He has yet to say something like "I enjoy spending time with you, I like you, I like xyz about you" or something along those lines, even though I've said such things. I plan to stop saying those things for now. Does he just not like me or something?
lamaga Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 If a guy texts me "herp derp" I know I have found my perfect match. What more do you want?
lamaga Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 All jokes aside: Stop overanalyzing and STOP playing games. If you guys are college aged and not in high school anymore it shouldn't be too hard to admit to feelings, and if you think he isn't the kind of guy who'd admit to his feelings in verbal expression with help of the words that you want to hear then why don't you just make the first step? He obviously is into you. But you might have a different kind of humor than he has... could be an issue. Good luck.
mammasita Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 (edited) I think he may be a tad immature emotionally. Sounds like he has a great sense of humor but doesn't have a clear line regarding when to joke and when to be serious. Not sure that you and he would be a good match based on personalities clashing. Edited June 2, 2013 by mammasita Grammar 2
phineas Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 I've asked about this guy before, but he continues to confuse me. Basically, I met him in college in August, he asked for my number in February, and we started dating in early May. We've been on 3 dates so far. Just yesterday, I was invited over to his house. He was a complete gentleman, we had dinner, cuddled, and watched movies. He seems to be a somewhat negative person, and has a LONG list of dislikes. I joked that he hated me yesterday, and he said "I never hated you!." Today, I joked thru text that I was a horrible person for not exercising today and he responded on a text "I agree, you're a horrible person." When I responded saying "I knew u hated me all along!!," his response was "herp derp." I know I'm probably being too sensitive, BUT I feel like his response was a tad childish, and that at this point he should be able to admit that he at least enjoys my company. He has yet to say something like "I enjoy spending time with you, I like you, I like xyz about you" or something along those lines, even though I've said such things. I plan to stop saying those things for now. Does he just not like me or something? You sound insecure. what are you confused about? That he came over for a movie & didn't try to stick his dic inside you like all the other guys you've dated? How about you stop fishing for compliments? It's annoying from a guys stand point. 5
joystickd Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 He tells you how he feels it's over because he gave you validation. If you tell him first how you feel then he may tell you. 2
phineas Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 He tells you how he feels it's over because he gave you validation. If you tell him first how you feel then he may tell you. Pretty much this is my experiance. it's almost a guarantee if the woman is insecure. *poofaronie* LOL! It becomes a turn-off for most woman unless they are in a relationship with the guy.
Adele0908 Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 It takes most guys a long time to express their feelings. A lot of women expect their men to act like women. It's not gonna happen. Unless you get one of those sensitive "nice" guys 1
TheGuard13 Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 Some people convey their feelings through actions, not words. What do his actions say? 1
FitChick Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 I agree that actions speak louder than words. If he wants to spend time with you he likes you. Talk is cheap. 1
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 2, 2013 Author Posted June 2, 2013 1. Yea, I'm definitely a bit insecure, I'll admit that. This is why it's bothering me!! 2. Actually, the fact that he invited me over without trying anything made me like him A LOT more, it didn't bother me in the least. He's a gentleman 3. Really? Is that actually what happens? I feel like if he admitted he had feelings for me, I'd be SO MUCH more into him! I don't understand the logic of this one, and it's a little hard to believe.
Author starrynightz45 Posted June 3, 2013 Author Posted June 3, 2013 Is this really men's experience? That women back off once you SAY you're actually interested in them? That sounds so ridiculous.
MercuryMorrison1 Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Is this really men's experience? That women back off once you SAY you're actually interested in them? That sounds so ridiculous. As much as I hate to admit it...Its happened to me before. 1
Eddie Edirol Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Is this really men's experience? That women back off once you SAY you're actually interested in them? That sounds so ridiculous. Oh yeah, when some women dont have to wonder, they make a run for it. 2
carhill Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Why a guy won't admit that he likes you/is into you? He wants to date you. As shared prior, he may have, as most of we males here have, had significant and/or numerous experiences with 'sharing' his 'interest' in a woman and having them disappear so he becomes more reticent. If he doesn't learn his lesson soon enough, he gets to be a cynic like me. I didn't learn until my 30's, so have scores of anecdotes which support the 'why' here. The 20's were the worst. Yikes. Anyway, only he knows for sure 'why'. Evidently the mystery is keeping you in the game for now. If he's sufficiently attractive, you hang around to figure it out. He likes you, in that fuzzy, wuzzy, romantic way, IMO. Up to you what you do with that. Good luck. 1
phineas Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Oh yeah, when some women dont have to wonder, they make a run for it. Yep. and to be honest, when i never said a damn thing about whether I liked a woman or not & kept my feeling to myself & just banged them for a while those women fell hardest for me. 1
TheGuard13 Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Ditto. There's something to be said for tension and mystery.
Steph321 Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 I used to feel a bit insecure and even hurt by the fact that my boyfriend would never tell me how much he cares for me or missed me while on vacation. It took me awhile to figure out he is more "action" then "verbal." For example, after he returns from a trip away from me I'll tell him how much I missed him, and he'll give me a very tight and long hug without saying a damn thing. Or he'll show me he cares by teaching me things and sharing his wisdom with me when I show interest in a subject. Or he'll stand beside me in the kitchen and help with cooking and/or dishes. He has a hard time verbalizing his feelings, so he does little things like that, which shows how he feels. That's just how he is.. I'm sure alot of men are similar. Now that I understand him better I don't mind it at all and appreciate him much more for it.
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