Phantom888 Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Ladies, If you are currently talking to a bunch of men, went on 1st dates with some of them, and suddenly come across a man that you feel REALLY GOOD about, would you: 1) Focus on that one guy, and reduce your communication with other potentials? 2) Continue to talk and go on dates with others to compare, until you find someone BETTER than that one compatible guy? 3) Try to accumulate several men that you feel REALLY GOOD about, weed out the rest, and choose one to pursue? I'm interested in knowing whether you ladies are always seeking something better, or are content when you find a special connection. Thanks!
tbf Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 When I used to multidate, it was because my mindset wasn't relationship focused. In juggling, it prevented investment. 1
sweetkiwi Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 First I do number 1. Then 3. followed, of course by 5. I always try to multidate but I just end up focusing all my attention on the guy I am super into. 1
sweetheart5381 Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Definitely #1... only #1. I personally don't feel a special connection very often (likely because I am very content being single and independent) so if I feel that with one man, every other man disappears to me. The way I see it is that: A) The others will still be there if it doesn't work out with the special connection. B) If it isn't special, then I'd rather not waste my time on A 1
Woohoo Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Ladies, If you are currently talking to a bunch of men, went on 1st dates with some of them, and suddenly come across a man that you feel REALLY GOOD about, would you: 1) Focus on that one guy, and reduce your communication with other potentials? 2) Continue to talk and go on dates with others to compare, until you find someone BETTER than that one compatible guy? 3) Try to accumulate several men that you feel REALLY GOOD about, weed out the rest, and choose one to pursue? I'm interested in knowing whether you ladies are always seeking something better, or are content when you find a special connection. Thanks! Guy with his .02. As a general note I would prefer a woman who uses option 3. You know she wants the best and is mature enough to go for it. I am the best.
Author Phantom888 Posted May 31, 2013 Author Posted May 31, 2013 Guy with his .02. As a general note I would prefer a woman who uses option 3. You know she wants the best and is mature enough to go for it. I am the best. The thing is, I don't like to be chosen...like a contestant on The Bachelor. I prefer to swoop in, and take her, and everyone else becomes smoke (distant memory). I'd prefer a girl who picks #1. I suspect my lady is that kind of girl.
pteromom Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 It would depend on my goal. If my goal was a LTR, then yes, 1. If my goal was just having fun, then I'd continue to multidate.
Estate Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Ok, I'm a guy BUT... Lets say you're chatting to 4 guys and meet the 5th. Make the 5th guy your priority in making something happen with if he is what you want... Keep the others until you KNOW it's going somewhere with the latest guy. Maybe start whittling them down. You never know if it'll work out so if there's 1-2 others who you kinda like, why not just keep dating them for a little bit too. That all said... don't make it obvious tot he guys you are dating around. It can be a turnoff when a girl boats about it.
clia Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 I would do 4) Continue to talk and go on dates with others until the compatible guy brought up exclusivity. However, the others would likely begin to fall off over time as I started to focus on the compatible guy, provided things were going well between us. But I wouldn't initially reduce the amount of communication with the other guys. 1
serial muse Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Ladies, If you are currently talking to a bunch of men, went on 1st dates with some of them, and suddenly come across a man that you feel REALLY GOOD about, would you: 1) Focus on that one guy, and reduce your communication with other potentials? 2) Continue to talk and go on dates with others to compare, until you find someone BETTER than that one compatible guy? 3) Try to accumulate several men that you feel REALLY GOOD about, weed out the rest, and choose one to pursue? I'm interested in knowing whether you ladies are always seeking something better, or are content when you find a special connection. Thanks! I'd do the first. 1
Author Phantom888 Posted May 31, 2013 Author Posted May 31, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time?
Treasa Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time? It wouldn't turn me off at all.
happykat Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time? That wouldn't turn me off, as long as he's not dictating that that's what I should be doing too (at least not early on in the relationship). Personally, I am #1 - I don't have much time to date period, and if there was one guy that stands out as special, then yes - I would concentrate what little time I do have on him. 1
sweetheart5381 Posted June 2, 2013 Posted June 2, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time? Hell no, that's what sets the stage for fireworks. TBH, I am fine if a guy doesn't want to date exclusively, it clearly tells me that he isn't really that into me and I move on easy and fast 2 people really into one another that are on the same page should NOT be multi-dating. They should be enjoying the time and that feeling for all it is worth.
serial muse Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time? Not at all; I'd find it very appealing.
tbf Posted June 3, 2013 Posted June 3, 2013 Would it turn you ladies off if the compatible man, whom you really like, told you he's the kind of guy who only dates one at a time, and doesn't particularly like to multi-date because he wants to focus on getting to know one lady at a time?Not at all. Bonus!
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