Noma Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 I work with my ex. We run a restaurant together. I have had thoughts these past few weeks about finding a new job and moving away. However, I am in a situation right now where I can save a lot of money staying right where I am, and the restaurant is in its busiest season. It would be a stress on everyone involved in the business if I left. I know, maybe I shouldn't care, but I do. I plan to keep working there. I went out last night for the first time in a while, danced, drank, had fun. Did nothing real exciting, but it felt good! And then I decided, hey, I can do this. I can work there at the place I love, and things can get better. Mind over matter right??? It's all about what I put in to it. And I need to get back in to life. Who's to say I can't do that right where I am. And should it not work out... I can leave then. But, I'm 3 mo post BU. and doing ok most days. 1
BustedUpInside Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 If it is working for you, then why change it? Like you said, if it ever stops working, then you can move on. I agree, it sounds like you know what you want and are doing just fine
metal_chick Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 If it works for you, keep doing it until it stops working for you. Sounds like you're doing fine. Good luck :-)
Author Noma Posted June 1, 2013 Author Posted June 1, 2013 I am surprised. Everyone says do NC. Not going to lie some days are hard still. But its getting better.
Leigh 87 Posted June 1, 2013 Posted June 1, 2013 But you do not contact him unless it is work related. Your not at home stalking his facebook page... Your not calling or texting him.. You have accepted it is over and want to move onto better things. All seeing an ex would do is prolong the healing process, not halt it entirely. There are folks who do not work with or see their ex, who do total NC, and still do not move on as well as you have.
Author Noma Posted June 1, 2013 Author Posted June 1, 2013 We do still talk about things. We split up our pets. Talk about that, and other things sometimes. But I do try my best to keep things about work.
metal_chick Posted June 1, 2013 Posted June 1, 2013 I am surprised. Everyone says do NC. Not going to lie some days are hard still. But its getting better. Everyone is different. NC is a proven strategy, but there are always exceptions that prove the rule. If you're comfortable around him, if you're not pining for him, if you're living your life like he is a business partner and not a potential lover, if you're living your own life that is not influenced by him, then do it until it stops working. You sound fine. Just take care of you. And no "ex sex"! :-)
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