Col1 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 (edited) Many single adults own homes. If a single homeowner marries a spouse who also owns a home, then: -Will the couple choose one house to live in, and the other will most likely sell or rent out the vacant home? OR -Do both sell their homes, and then they buy a different house together? Please share what have you observed people do in this situation when two separate homeowners marry. Edited May 30, 2013 by Col1
CarrieT Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Everyone is different... I knew some couples who kept both houses and bought a third... Some will sell both and use the equity to buy a new one. There are too many variables - like who has more equity or stability in one house versus another...
Silly_Girl Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 We bought a new house (both keen to start that adventure together, since it was a feasible option) and now consider his previous fairly modest house 'our investment'. We have a good tenant and hope to just leave it running until there's no mortgage.
AlexDP Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Many single adults own homes. If a single homeowner marries a spouse who also owns a home, then: -Will the couple choose one house to live in, and the other will most likely sell or rent out the vacant home? OR -Do both sell their homes, and then they buy a different house together? Please share what have you observed people do in this situation when two separate homeowners marry. Seriously? Many single adults own homes? Not in most parts of the world..
TaraMaiden Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Quite common here in the UK, particularly with middle-aged/senior adults....
AlexDP Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Quite common here in the UK, particularly with middle-aged/senior adults.... Not in Belgium, I can tell you that. Among seniors the situation is different of course.
Nyla Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Many single adults own homes. If a single homeowner marries a spouse who also owns a home, then: -Will the couple choose one house to live in, and the other will most likely sell or rent out the vacant home? OR -Do both sell their homes, and then they buy a different house together? Please share what have you observed people do in this situation when two separate homeowners marry. I have noticed that the partner with the smaller and less expensive home will often move into the other partner's house. Selling both homes and looking for a new one together seems like the most compromising choice. It also shows that the couple wants to merge their tastes for a home which reflects the both of them. 1
TaraMaiden Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Not in Belgium, I can tell you that. Among seniors the situation is different of course. Take a look... The secret of a happy marriage? Live next door to your husband | Mail Online Divided we stand: committed couples who live apart - Telegraph The live-apartners: How one million couples live in separate homes | Mail Online
carhill Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Please share what have you observed people do in this situation when two separate homeowners marry. Most of the folks in my social circle who re-married later in life where both owned homes either added both to their rental portfolios/gave them to the kids/grandkids and bought new together or sold both and went full-timing.
Nyla Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Most people I know, single or not, here in the US eventually buy a home. Most in my age range (late 20s/30ish) are working on buying a home if they haven't already. Same here, though that has changed a great deal since the recession. I know a lot of young people who have been forced to move back in with their parents, because of the economic decline. Many of them are highly educated but cannot find work. 1
tbf Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 I sold my condo and moved into his single family detached home since we knew we wanted kids and my place was too small.
georgia girl Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 We talked about it extensively - the "yours, mine or ours" question and ended up choosing his home. Although my home was more finished, his had more space and more property. In the end, the space inside the home fit our lifestyle - we both thought we needed an individualized office space to have our own personal bolt-hole - and the space outside fit our lifestyle. We like to garden and do outdoor activities and I had a city lot. Here's what some of our thoughts were: 1) We decided quickly that if we could, we wanted to choose one of our homes. The expense related to selling both homes equaled lost equity. Paying realtor fees to sell both homes and then closing fees to buy a new home would result in a loss of capital. 2) My home was nicer, but in the end I argued that it was the "lipstick on the pig" so to speak. I could easily recreate it in his house - helping to make it mine, too - and mine would be easier to sell. 3) Lifestyle and location had to be paramount. How did we want to live? Where? More downtown? More in the country? To be honest, once we decided that, the decision was done. I think it depends on the couple. Some women would feel uncomfortable moving into "another woman's" house; some want a fresh start as another poster put it; and some honestly don't want that much change. For us, picking one was a financial and a lifestyle decision. We made the right choice. 1
Ursa Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Well, I owned a townhouse but I had already moved to a different city and was using my place as a rental unit when I met my H, so I ended up moving into his condo. We originally planned to sell his place, keep mine as a rental, and buy a larger house to move our growing family into...but the conditions of the market at that time and in that location led to our using his place as a rental as well, and then buying our third property together. My place is larger and with nicer grounds and a pool, but in a less desirable location. His place has the better school district and great public transit.
ThomasD Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Here's what some of our thoughts were: Reviewing your process and consideration, it sounds like you have the basis for a solid marriage. Keep up the good work!
ThomasD Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 I suppose the "most traditional" approach is that the wife moves to join the husband. -Do both sell their homes, and then they buy a different house together? This was the advice I most commonly heard, especially when there was a prior marriage by either partner but also if it was both partners' first marriage. This supposedly symbolized "forsaking all others", establishing their new identity as a married couple, etc. There is probably some validity to that reasoning but I don't think it should be assumed as the default approach. Since questions about family, life directions, and finances are fundamental to a marriage I think they should be evaluated as significant factors in the decision.
AlexDP Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Take a look... The secret of a happy marriage? Live next door to your husband | Mail Online Divided we stand: committed couples who live apart - Telegraph The live-apartners: How one million couples live in separate homes | Mail Online I'm talking about how people can afford homes, Tara .
georgia girl Posted June 1, 2013 Posted June 1, 2013 Reviewing your process and consideration, it sounds like you have the basis for a solid marriage. Keep up the good work! Thanks! We do have a great marriage, even though I am a little annoyed with him at this moment. Please don't remind me he's a great guy right now. 1
ThomasD Posted June 1, 2013 Posted June 1, 2013 . . . I am a little annoyed with him at this moment. . . . Yeah, from time to time I remind her that I need to make a new entry on the list of "Things My NEXT Wife Won't Do". After almost 39 years it's rather lengthy. (And there's her list of "Things My NEXT Husband Won't Do".) Probably a topic for a new thread, though.
Recommended Posts