vortmax Posted October 5, 2004 Posted October 5, 2004 I'm in one heck of a situation. About a year ago I me this girl. Unfortunatly we happened to live about 600 miles apart. So after the initial meeting, the only means of communication we had were telephone and IM. So we kept in contact, and after several months i found myself falling for her. A few weeks after we had met, she had met and started casually seeing this guy in the navy. At the time all was cool, after all we had just started to get to know one another. Well, the whole time I saw it happening, but we still continued to become closer and closer. He ended up going off to Japan on a duty tour and since I became the one she would turn to for everything. So eventually it had to happen. I found the time to make a trip out to see her again. When I saw her, I realized how much she really meant to me and i could tell there was something between us. But there were still these complications keeping it from becoming. So after an amazing visit, I head home and find out through talking to her that she really enjoyed it and that she really misses me. So I tell her how I felt and she reveals that she does have feelings for me too, but didn't let them go anywhere because she was already with this other guy. So I go on for about a month knowing this. Trying to get over her bcause i know nothing will probably happen. For one she has this other serious realtionship, and she's told me she really loves the guy, and even if he as out of the picture there is still this 600 mile distance between us. So it's looking hopeless for me. Yet still when we talk, I constantly get the impression that there is something there that will not go away. So tonight I am talking to her and we start talking about songs and I send her a certain set of lyrics from the song "i miss you" by incubus. She then asks me if i was just sending that or if i meant it. I told her i meant it and she hinted that she had much deeper feelings then she was letting on because of the aformentioned complications. Even with her knowing all this out in the open, it's not uncomfortable with her. In fact we talk about and she gets really concerned when she knows i'm depressed about it. So now i'm at a complete loss. This girl is probably the most compatable girl I have ever met. I have feelings for her, she has them back for me....yet it seems like everything is trying to keep us away from one another. Her b/f comes back in Jan and they're supposed to move in together. She tells me that she loves him, but at the same time she tells me that he's starting to annoy her and she's thinking about breaking it off with him. I guess his visit here in a month will be the acid test. For once i just really don't know what to do. I really don't want to give up on her, but I have the impression that is not realistic. Even if it were to happen, I'd have to make a major change in my plans for future grad school and such to make this work. I try to move on, but i'm always drawn back...like i'm not supposed to.
Author vortmax Posted October 5, 2004 Author Posted October 5, 2004 it's hard to have patience. In another month or so i get to start applying for grad schools. This is what is going to determine where I'm going to be for the next 2 to 3 years and probably a lot longer then that. I would hate to accept an offer froma school way out west, then have something actually happen, and be stuck with a several thousand miles seperation as opposed to a mere several hundred mile. On the other hand, I could also see accepting a school close to her, then nothing working out. They I'd be stuck wondering "why didn't i just head out west." grrrr
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