Sunshine87 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Hey all, I've noticed a lot of recent posts about dating. I honestly think that when it gets to a point where people have to ask for advice regarding the person they are dating, this is often indicative of a doomed relationship. The truth is: If your relationship is going fine (at least during the early stages), you certainly won't have to ask questions online. Are you aware of any serious relationship that commenced with the little issues and questions people ask about? Perhaps the fact that one is forced to ask these questions at the start of a relationship or during the early dating stages is indicative that the relationship is faulty I.e one person isn't doing something right. Thoughts?
Author Sunshine87 Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 Or perhaps it is indicative of one's insecurities and baggage emanating from previous years of disappointment? Surely if you're in the "right" relationship, it won't be fraught with anxiety but peace and calm?
sillyanswer Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Hey all, I've noticed a lot of recent posts about dating. In a dating forum? Where people come to ask questions about dating? Amazing! 3
Emilia Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Perhaps the fact that one is forced to ask these questions at the start of a relationship or during the early dating stages is indicative that the relationship is faulty I.e one person isn't doing something right. Thoughts? I think that people sometimes face something they haven't before. If they are smart they notice it earlier and don't just ignore it. I don't think that's necessarily doom and gloom, no. I like it when posters post about something that's quite new to them and pushes them out of the their comfort zone. That usually means they probably like the person 3
lamaga Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Perhaps the fact that one is forced to ask these questions at the start of a relationship or during the early dating stages is indicative that the relationship is faulty I.e one person isn't doing something right. Well I don't feel forced to ask questions but it helps me understand my actions better. I did a lot of things wrong in past relationships and I have difficulties learning from my mistakes, albeit knowing WHAT I did wrong. I have gotten lots of good advice over the past few months here and it has changed my outlook on dating life a great amount, for the better that is. 1
Author Sunshine87 Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 Good points. I do agree that the advice on here has prevented me from making a lot of mistakes that I made in the past. It keeps me on guard and makes me extremely cautious. It also makes me anaylse a lot. I guess this isn't inherently a bad thing? But in a way, it takes away some of the fun from dating. Ultimately if you are looking for a serious relationship, I guess this is a good thing because it helps reduce the severity of potential heartbreak and also helps you conduct yourself in the best possible way (although this could involve some games) lol.
scorpio1978 Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 I came to a revelation yesterday after reading some of the posts I had written about someone I have been dating. They are all about him and riddled with uncertainty and insecurity coming from me. I actually made a statement yesterday "I know what I need to do here" and something to the effect of "If I have to ask if he is truly interested, he very well likely isn't". So, I agree with what you're saying to a certain degree. However, in my defense, and I am sure others may feel the same, sometimes a little encouragement or reassurance is needed.
Tinie Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Actually it doesn't necessarily mean a relationship is doomed. People are trying to understand each other since we are not all the same and therefore think in different ways. I have trouble understanding guys sometimes so I post, not because I think something is doomed, but because I need the advice of more experienced people, like the ones here on LS.
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