veggirl Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Just ask if it's bothering you. The passive aggressive beating around the bush (why do you want me to go on a trip with you? REALLY???) is going to turn him off really quickly. It comes off as needy and dramatic, be confident and straight forward.
Author lamaga Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 (edited) Good grief woman you are spoiled. From your post it seems as if he is the one putting forth all the effort. What are you doing for him and the relationship? I am not spoiled, I am just not experienced when it comes to this kind of dating. I am doing a lot for this relationship. I take the one and a half hour train to see him more than twice a week and I take him for dinner and drinks, cook for him, I am helping him plan our trip cause he is busy, I am always very affectionate and caring (he likes that), so your judgement is inaccurate. I can't see any reason at all based on what you posted about why you would be questioning this relationship. He seems totally into you, and things are going along as they should be for one month into the relationship. What is your problem? You are going to sabotage this relationship if you don't get a handle on your insecurity. You need to just go with the flow and stop worrying about labels. You have established exclusivity. Enjoy that. It's only been one month, for Gods sakes. Be patient. Asking him WHY he wants to take you on a trip is absurd. The correct answer is "I would love to go." Stop second guessing things, stop overanalyzing things, and go with it. He wants to take you on the trip because he likes you. End of story. Do you have any idea how annoying it is to deal with someone who is insecure as you are when he seems to be doing everything he should be doing? He is initiating contact, taking you out on dates, inviting you on trips...what more do you need? Seriously! You sound super high maintenance. And stop comparing him to your ex. He isn't your ex. I am not comparing him to my ex at all. He is nothing like any guy I ever dated and I am happy that's how things are. I am not super high maintenance either. As I said before, this kind of dating (where you meet someone online, go on a date and see where things go from there) I have NEVER done before and I am just a bit nervous. I am also not insecure about not being able to keep him or anything like that. I guess I just sometimes have trouble reading him is all. I am very much enjoying our time together and have no expectations. I got a lot of great advice from you guys on the first page of this thread, the last few posts were a bit aggressive and you guys are getting the wrong picture of me... :/ Just ask if it's bothering you. The passive aggressive beating around the bush (why do you want me to go on a trip with you? REALLY???) is going to turn him off really quickly. It comes off as needy and dramatic, be confident and straight forward. I am not passive aggressive at all, I am very chill with him, we mutually enjoy spending time with each other and there is not hostility, passive aggressiveness, drama or neediness from my side at all. I am a very confident young woman and this is one of the reasons he likes me, I think. I just suck at typed communication, like Skype chat or text because I can't be myself, overanalyze and all that **** Maybe from now on I just tell him to call me instead. Anyway, we are going on a vacation together, so I think all will be awesome and great and I will stop worrying about anything now... Thanks to the ones who were helpful! Edited May 30, 2013 by lamaga
MidwestUSA Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I'm signing off for a long weekend, but once again, enjoy!! 1
Eddie Edirol Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Maybe from now on I just tell him to call me instead. yes please, stop typing and just talk on the phone, or do the video chat on skype. If you have a hard time reading him, either you are trying to hard or h makes it difficult for some reason. Just keep your feelings close and ride it out for a while until you get to know him better.
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