hw172 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 So I will paste in the message I sent today. But just a quick background. She left me jan 1st, and since day one has never said it's fully over and always has made it seem like like it may work out in the future. Since then she got back with ex, got really cold, etc. Basically it has completely held me back from recovery. I keep thinking she will call but I know she has a bf and is trying to work it out with him so it's been tough. I still have feelings for her but I think it was about time to say what I had to say, considering I've always been the "nice guy who will always care for her". By being that, I've realized she has had all the power and knew she could have me back at anytime, which i'm sure is a turn off. So I messaged this. I just hope it didn't come across rude or anything. I want to be remembered well. Tell me what you think please. Dear *****, Please read this letter and understand that everything that I say is meant with the upmost respect for you so please do not take offense. Since we had coffee a few things you said have kind of stuck with me- the first being that you miss the single life. The second was that you were for sure over 50% that we would never work out. First of all, I have cared for you more than anyone or anything that has ever come into my life and still do. But from how things have unfolded, I have found myself resentful towards the situation. From day one of the breakup you have lead me to believe that there was a chance of things working out, which has made it extremely hard for me. I think this is unfair. Either it's over and you don't love someone, or you do love them and you want to work things out. I believe if someone really loves someone they will do whatever to make things work until they know pretty certain it is going no where. The thing that really just gets to me is how you told me things were over for good with casey, and you were 100%. Also how you said you loved me and always would and would always work through things. But only for you to end up with him, not work out things with me, and then tell me you can't say you "love me" because it's unfair to casey. This truly broke my heart and was so tough at times. From all this I honestly do not see how there could ever be any trust between us. I completely let me guard down with you and truly believed everything you said, only to have every promise broken. It really must not be meant to be. And that's okay. It has been a lesson for me, it also has been a new/first experience for me. Before you I didn't really want to get married. But after meeting you, I was certain i wanted to and I wanted to settle down and have a family and I thought that person was you. So I just want to say thanks for the memories and thanks for being you. But you're clearly back with your ex and are trying to make it work, and we both have moved to different chapters in our lives. So from here, I think there is really is no point for either of us to have any hope that things will workout someday because it clearly isn't meant to be. Again, I care for you and always will. But I think it's best if we delete each others numbers and go our separate ways. Please don't text, snap chat, instagram, etc. me. Sorry if that sounds rude, but if you respect me you will understand that these things just send false messages to me. I will also do the same and respect you and your personal life. Anyway, again you have been a big part of my life believe it or not, and I wish you the best of luck with teaching and Casey. You are a great person and I know great things are ahead for you, and i really mean that. You don't need to reply, as I'm sure we've both said just about everything possible to each other that we can. xoxo *******
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I hope this provides you with the closure you're seeking. 1
Author hw172 Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 I hope this provides you with the closure you're seeking. It helps for sure. Before message she knew I was pretty much waiting around. I cannot do that. Being the guy that is waiting around is not a good look for anyone i'm sure. What do you think? Mature and appropriate message?
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 It helps for sure. Before message she knew I was pretty much waiting around. I cannot do that. Being the guy that is waiting around is not a good look for anyone i'm sure. What do you think? Mature and appropriate message? It doesn't matter what I think. It only matters if you feel better now. However, I wouldn't (and never have) have sent it. I'm not even sure what I would think if I got an email like that. I do understand where the urge comes from however.
Author hw172 Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 It doesn't matter what I think. It only matters if you feel better now. However, I wouldn't (and never have) have sent it. I'm not even sure what I would think if I got an email like that. I do understand where the urge comes from however. Well it's still fresh after contact, so obviously it's a little weird. Kind of the feeling of breaking NC. Kind of feel bad, but I just look at like it was either cut the cord or let her believe that i'm always here for her and me have the hope she will someday react on that and call me. If I got a message like that, I would probably think that the person still cares, but isn't going to tollerate being 2nd choice. And that the promises broken have created damage that is very likely something that can't be undone. And I would not contact them again. Well I guess that's how i hope it came across. 1
Recommended Posts