femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 So i'm 27, 6'2" 180lbs, 32 waist, go to the gym every other night, have a fairly good physique. I consider myself to be an attractive (but not overly) young man, at least all the nurses (especially the older ones) have made comments "if they were 30 years younger". I have a very nice warm smile. I'm a doctor, so not exactly like i don't have a respected job and have worked hard for it. I drive a really nice car. I had a strong upbringing. I've been taught proper manners regarding women by my mother (even little things like holding doors for ladies, which is something all men should do). So what exactly is my issue with finding someone? I catch women eyeing me all the time, I chat them up and they flirt back. I never say anything inappropriate and keep it light hearted, but when I ask them what they're doing this weekend etc they always seem to have plans or some excuse. Then I'll call or send one more text and they never respond so I don't either as I'm not going to harass a woman if she's not interested or playing games. This has happened with the past 4 women I guess I'm just venting. If i was abrasive and rude to women im sure they'de be lining up
Els Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I was a little skeptical when I heard that a doctor in residency had the time to go to the gym every other night , so I went to your previous posts. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/386639-am-i-settling-she-one shows that you've been in a relationship at MOST a month ago. What's up with thinking you have an 'issue with finding someone'? Also, why were you 28 a month ago? 2
Author femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 I rounded, I technically turn 28 in a few months, point is i'm around there and i'm not too old yet. Yes but that was my only relationship in the past 3 years, and it was more off and on than on. The one before that ended in a train wreck, seriously as bad as possible Yes i do go to the gym, yes I am a doctor, yes the medical field but not a physician. Yes I go directly after going off, and 50 minutes tops. Thanks for the constructive feedback ;-)
hppr Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I was a little skeptical when I heard that a doctor in residency had the time to go to the gym every other night , so I went to your previous posts. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/romantic/dating/386639-am-i-settling-she-one shows that you've been in a relationship at MOST a month ago. What's up with thinking you have an 'issue with finding someone'? Also, why were you 28 a month ago? LOL. Makes me think he might be fibbing about other things. Unless she didn't really count or something, IE not a real relationship just more of an "I'm single, so are you, wanna be my friend" sort of thing.
Author femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 Honestly I guess I'm just venting that it's so hard to find someone who you're crazy about who's crazy about you who is compatible enough to spend your life with please excuse the double post
Author femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 LOL. Makes me think he might be fibbing about other things. Unless she didn't really count or something, IE not a real relationship just more of an "I'm single, so are you, wanna be my friend" sort of thing. Guys, please don't turn this into a joke thread. I was honestly coming here for just a little input. Wasn't looking to get flamed here
BluEyeL Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I'd blame the statistics, need compatibility on multiple levels.
Els Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 (edited) A 9-month R in 3 years sounds pretty much par by course to me, chap. Doesn't sound like anything to worry about. Also, sounds like she was crazy about you, but you ended it because you weren't crazy about her (and she didn't cook and clean for you). So the issue doesn't seem like 'it's hard to get women interested in you'. I also don't understand how you can be a doctor but not a physician. I understand that some specialties are less taxing than others, but they too are technically 'physicians'. Care to elaborate? Edited May 30, 2013 by Elswyth
Author femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 A 9-month R in 3 years sounds pretty much par by course for me, chap. Doesn't sound like anything to worry about. I also don't understand how you can be a doctor but not a physician. I understand that some specialties are less taxing than others, but they too are technically 'physicians'. Care to elaborate? Thanks, that's good to hear. I've always felt that I don't date much (very seldom go on a date, maybe 1-2x every 6 months, honest. I have a small social circle and seldom go to bars etc. I never drink to excess, only social drinks infrequently) Dentists are doctors too, trying to be a little vague to keep the internet semi-anonymous
Els Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Thanks, that's good to hear. I've always felt that I don't date much (very seldom go on a date, maybe 1-2x every 6 months, honest. I have a small social circle and seldom go to bars etc. I never drink to excess, only social drinks infrequently) Referring to your previous thread, I don't think the issue here is you having women interested in you, as I said. It's more about your expectations of women. Dentists are doctors too, trying to be a little vague to keep the internet semi-anonymous Uh, first time I've heard that being said. Most people I know (who are in the medical profession) would disagree, but let's leave it at that.
hppr Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Thanks, that's good to hear. I've always felt that I don't date much (very seldom go on a date, maybe 1-2x every 6 months, honest. I have a small social circle and seldom go to bars etc. I never drink to excess, only social drinks infrequently) Dentists are doctors too, trying to be a little vague to keep the internet semi-anonymous It sounds to me like you want to figure out how to more successfully flirt/get laid rather than just 1-2 unsatisfying girlfriends you've had in the past. First you aren't dating your mother, or one of those nice 50 year old ladies at work, you're talking to young chicks who you don't know from Adam. So forget about all that gentleman stuff and just treat them the same way you would some other random stranger, at least until you get to know them well enough. Second of all you say that when they turn you down you don't bug them...your second lesson is that women almost ALWAYS turn guys down right off the bat. "I have a boyfriend, I'm really busy" PFFT. BS. They do that stuff to see if you'll still come after them. If you're nice, polite, okay that's great whatever they write you off. You have to bug them a bit more, don't take no for an answer. Be assertive, if some girl agrees to a date and then blows you off ask her what her problem is. Another thing is appearances. I don't know how you dress but if you work in the medical field making GOOD money don't be shy about flaunting that. Nice car, nice clothes, nice shoes, do your best to look important. So if you've already got that going for you okay, if not think about that sort of stuff. Believe me women home in on this sort of thing. Finally where do you go to MEET WOMEN? If you work all day, then go to the gym, then go home and curl up with a good book you're not going to meet anyone. How often do you go out to the clubs and dance with girls? How often you hit up house parties? That sort of stuff. Really just reading your posts the answer should be staring you bold in the face. You don't go out much, not really assertive, that's just no bueno for getting girls.
Author femaletroubles Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 thanks for the advice hppr. Honestly, I'm at the point in my life i don't really care about getting "laid anymore" college was a long time ago. I'll have to work on going out more. (seldom do, not a huge bar scene person) Stop being such a gentlemen to women, got it. I can be more assertive. I already dress professionally every day. Thank you for taking the time to give some great advice
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