pessimisticpete Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Would like your opinions on this letter i plan on sending to my ex. Background: We've been together and in love for 3 and a half years. Recently though, she said she's been losing feelings for me because of the way i act, complacent, disrespectful, and lazy. Also i think she's been extremely stressed out because of uni exams and moving houses out of town, with her mom's boyfriend whom she doesn't like. She broke it off and we've been on NC for 2 weeks. She's a very emotional girl and I'm pretty sure she still has a soft spot for me. I'd rather send this sooner than later before its too late, also should i handwrite it? All advice is welcome. "I thought I'd write you this letter to share what i've been thinking about these days, and facebook/txt msg just doesn't cut it. I'll try to make it straight forward and the least corny possible. I sincerely want to thank you for breaking up with me. Breaking up with me is ironically one of the best things you've ever done for me. For the first bit i was depressed, feeling sorry for myself, and frantically trying to find solutions to your problems. But after a couple of days, i started realizing my own problems. I literally pushed the girl i'm in love with right out of my life all because of my,[sIZE=3]controlling, [/sIZE][sIZE=3]condescending[/sIZE][sIZE=3], anxious, lazy, and selfish[/sIZE] attitude towards you and towards life in general. Usually we figure things out and make-up within a couple of hours and it usually also doesn't fix anything, but this time was different and it was a huge wake-up call. Ever since then I've been trying to figure out ways to try to better myself and change my attitude in life. Stupid little things like trying to cook my own meals without relying on the microwave and working out more. Ever since i started exercising again, I feel like I'm thinking a lot clearer and feeling a lot more energetic. You probably know this from kin, because of all the endorphins being released in my body, it actually makes a huge difference. I'm really glad i got the wake-up call and I'm feeling a whole lot physically and mentally healthier. That being said, I still miss you like words can't describe. I wake up every single morning with a sick feeling in my gut knowing that the girl I'm in love with doesn't love me like she used to and won't talk to me. That's motivation enough for me to get up, work out, and try to be a better person. Believe me, words don't mean ****, but i can guarantee you that I'm trying my best to change my attitude towards life. I would never want to feel this type of pain, of pushing away someone i love dearly, ever again. I'm just sorry it took you to fully break up with me for me to realize. There's a lot of things i love about you. I couldn't fit it all onto this page so i made a separate page for that. The thing i miss most though is experiencing life with you. Having one person that you love to experience life with is the most fulfilling feeling I've ever felt. At this point, I'm not sure if I'll ever get the chance to experience life with you again, so in the meantime I plan on continuing to work on my attitude and just being a better person."
aisuru Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 (edited) Good God. NO. I skimmed it. But no. No second chances letter. You have not changed in 2 weeks. You are still the same person. Take some time and really really think about this. The letter may actually make it worse and push her away more. My advice... take a full 4-6 week break of no contact. Then decide how you feel. Right now you're just reflectively reacting to rejection. You need the time to assess, pick yourself up, and determine what you really need to work on. You don't have to be no contact forever. Just take some time. The space, time, distance will do you both good. Edited May 30, 2013 by aisuru 1
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