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What does it mean if you met a person & they admitted that they are dating others?

Mystic Dreamer

By Mystic Dreamer
in Dating

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Mystic Dreamer Member

Mystic Dreamer

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To explain my question into further detail:

 

Suppose you met someone and went on a few dates then they tell you that they are also dating other people what would you think about that? Like if you asked "hey I haven't heard from you in a few what happened" and they would say something like "well I'm dating other people as well so sorry if I haven't gotten back to you" (or if they volunteered and told you they are dating others simultaneously), wouldn't you take that as they are not into you like that?

 

I mean I know they are not exclusive but if you was starting to like a person on a serious level why would you try to make them jealous and tell them that there's a possibility that you are also interested in others as well. Shouldn't you at least keep that to yourself?

 

I just want to see other people's opinions on this topic that I saw on another site.

GB25 Established Member

GB25

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depends on how attracted i was to her..but most likely i would stop initiating contact..if she came running to me then we will see

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mortensorchid Established Member

mortensorchid

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Well she openly admitted that she was seeing others, so at least you know that this is the case. I have been in situations where I suspected the guy was seeing others but they would never actually tell me that. If that's the case, then she is really either seeing others or she's just not that into you. I'd wait it out a few days, then contact. If she comes running back then you know she at least likes you but if she's not in a rush to be with you for any reason then you have your answer.

HokeyReligions Established Member

HokeyReligions

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I was dating others when I started dating my now husband. So was he. I call it honesty. No one starts out exclusive. If sex is involved then you know what precautions to take. Keep communication open and if one developes deeper feelings talk about it. Just know that two people seldom feel the same thing at the same time. The choice becomes to wait for the other or make an exclusive commitment hoping shared feelings develope or end it then.

TheGuard13 Established Member

TheGuard13

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It means you're in an adult relationship with someone who is attractive enough to the opposite sex to be dating multiple people.

 

Why on earth would anyone keep this to themselves?

Treasa Established Member

Treasa

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I tend to know if they're dating anyone else before I go out on a date with them. It's part of my basic checklist. Are you married? Seeing anyone? A serial killer? Stuff like that.

 

However, if we're both upfront about dating others, I don't care about it at all. Actually, if I found out they were dating others but didn't tell me, I still doubt I'd care. If I enjoyed my dates, I'd continue dating them. If not, I'd stop.

 

I don't see dating as a competition with the person being a prize to be won. Therefore I don't get jealous about things like that anymore. If two people want to be together, good for them. :)

 

Edited to clarify: I would never get with someone who was married or in a relationship, no matter how much I liked that person. I know I shouldn't have to make that clear, but on this site, if I don't, someone will try to jump all over that.

ltjg45 Established Member

ltjg45

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Personally, I would end all contact.

 

I'm not interested in "competing" for a woman. If I actually do get into said competition, I would most likely lose so I rather save myself the time and embarrassment and remove myself from the audition.

crederer Established Member

crederer

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If no one is exclusive, then that is fine. I mean, this exactly what dating is. Looking around for a suitable partner. Until you are exclusive, it's acceptable. At least she's honest about it. I'd give her points for that. It shows she's trust worthy.

 

And to the people that say they don't want to compete for a woman. I got news for you, you are always competing for a partner. You are competing with every man out there. You are trying to win a partners attention in order to make them choose to be with you. That is a competition, whether you want to believe it or not.

Suave Established Member

Suave

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I would back off and if she comes looking for me, then take things a step further. But I am not willing to be a backup plan for anyone.

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Treasa Established Member

Treasa

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I'm not looking for a partner. I make that clear to people. You would think it would put men off, but no...

sillyanswer Established Member

sillyanswer

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I tend to know if they're dating anyone else before I go out on a date with them. It's part of my basic checklist. Are you married? Seeing anyone? A serial killer? Stuff like that.

 

I have actually been asked if I was an axe murderer. That's before I tell them how many axes I have.

 

Anyway, for the OPs situation it sounds like someone is owning up to multi-dating. That's 99 times better than lying about it, but it's still up to the OP whether it's an acceptable form of dating. Everyone has red lines or deal breakers etc, and sometimes multi-dating is one of them.

 

The topic question of "what does it mean?" ... it means what it says at face value.

phineas Established Member

phineas

Posted
Posted
To explain my question into further detail:

 

Suppose you met someone and went on a few dates then they tell you that they are also dating other people what would you think about that? Like if you asked "hey I haven't heard from you in a few what happened" and they would say something like "well I'm dating other people as well so sorry if I haven't gotten back to you" (or if they volunteered and told you they are dating others simultaneously), wouldn't you take that as they are not into you like that?

 

I mean I know they are not exclusive but if you was starting to like a person on a serious level why would you try to make them jealous and tell them that there's a possibility that you are also interested in others as well. Shouldn't you at least keep that to yourself?

 

I just want to see other people's opinions on this topic that I saw on another site.

 

she's being honest & just not that into you or legitimately doesn't want a commitment.

The majority of women my age (i'm 41) are like this.

 

I don't care if she's seeing other guys but If she isn't seeing me once a week she becomes hook-up fodder because you simply cannot get to know somebody if you are not seeing them at least once a week.

 

Basically, they got my number & I will go for it the next time they call me up to do something because I don't know when i'll see them again or if I will & 9/10 they will sleep with you then disappear for a few weeks then come back.

 

If you want a real relationship this is not the woman for you because it will frustrate you to no end.

 

If you have a busy life & other options then don't cut contact & see where it goes.

However again 9/10 times you will end up meeting someone in between your outings with her.

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