alibaby Posted May 28, 2013 Posted May 28, 2013 I'm new here. SO here is my long story short. My ex and I had been together for 3 and a half years. We broke up at about 1 year because of some circumstances that I feel were valid and stress led to us taking things out on each other and the fighting was constant. We got back together a month later. 2.5 years later, he breaks up with me pretty much out of nowhere. He's supported me in nursing school for the past 6 months and continuously talked about how proud and excited he was for our future. We planned on getting married when I graduated. He claims that he just wasn't happy in his own life, or with the direction his life was taking. Instead of fighting it, I told him ok, if that's what he needed to be happy, then that would be it. As much as it absolutely killed me, I couldn't fight for it anymore. I can't hold on to something that's not there. I loved him unconditionally and all I want is for him to be happy. He told me he appreciated it and that it showed a lot of maturity. I cried and stayed the night there because I needed him to comfort me. It's been no contact for almost 3 weeks now and it's absolutely killed me. There are some days where i'm not so sure I can do this. I miss him, and I miss us. I feel like my whole life was turned upside down, not to mention that i'm still incredibly close with his entire family. I haven't had much of a support system within my own family, so him and his family have been what's kept me going in nursing school. Not just financially, but emotionally. Everyone keeps telling me to work on myself and my own life, but I feel like that's what I've been doing all along and i'm not really sure where to go from here. I wonder if he's thinking about me, especially because I can't get him off my mind. I've always felt like he's the one, and listening to my gut, it still tells me that. Even though I know that I need to move on, what if he comes back? I'm not so sure how to get myself through these "bad" days anymore. I just want to sleep constantly because at least when I sleep he's in my dreams. HELP!
BLS Posted May 29, 2013 Posted May 29, 2013 "This too shall pass" If I did my math right, you were in a 5.5 year relationship. These 'bad days' will persist for months. However you will come to see that they become significantly less frequent. Every month, there will be less of them. It will get better. Here's what you NEED to do. No Contact. At all. That includes ALL SOCIAL NETWORK STALKING, cutting off his family, cutting off HIS friends, deleting ALL his contact information from any platform and throwing away anything he's given you or anything that reminds you of him. ONLY ONCE ALL OF THAT IS GONE, WILL YOU START TO GET BETTER Bad days really suck, we ALL have been there numerous times. What's important is to NEVER BREAK NO CONTACT. DO NOT DO IT (including social network stalking, that is just as bad as calling them). Secondly, talk to somebody. Let it all out, cry to your friends and express how you feel. Always remember this, "This too shall pass". Enjoy the rest of your day
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