Picturing relationship

[askingques122]

Because I've never had a girlfriend, I struggle to picture the relationship.

 

My lifestyle is simple. I study. I workout. I like to go for walks. I do community service and school clubs. I like music but can't dance. That's about it.

 

A lot of the standard date ideas are borring to me (I don't like bowling, art galleries, I hate going to restaurants). Also, I don't want things to get expensive.

 

So now that I'm writing this, I guess I realize that I'm (A) trying to make my life more exciting, (B) trying to picture what a relationship could be.

 

I know these are stupid questions. Thanks for any comments.

[JuneJulySeptember]

Because I've never had a girlfriend, I struggle to picture the relationship.

 

My lifestyle is simple. I study. I workout. I like to go for walks. I do community service and school clubs. I like music but can't dance. That's about it.

 

A lot of the standard date ideas are borring to me (I don't like bowling, art galleries, I hate going to restaurants). Also, I don't want things to get expensive.

 

So now that I'm writing this, I guess I realize that I'm (A) trying to make my life more exciting, (B) trying to picture what a relationship could be.

 

I know these are stupid questions. Thanks for any comments.

 

It's just a lot of hanging out and doing boring stuff.

 

Depends on the woman. Some women will expect you to entertain them, yes.

 

You'd be surprised how quickly a relationship forms for certain people. Two people like what they see, they start dating. and see where it goes. They figure out the other stuff later.

[BeholdtheMan]

Because I've never had a girlfriend, I struggle to picture the relationship.

 

My lifestyle is simple. I study. I workout. I like to go for walks. I do community service and school clubs. I like music but can't dance. That's about it.

 

A lot of the standard date ideas are borring to me (I don't like bowling, art galleries, I hate going to restaurants). Also, I don't want things to get expensive.

 

So now that I'm writing this, I guess I realize that I'm (A) trying to make my life more exciting, (B) trying to picture what a relationship could be.

 

I know these are stupid questions. Thanks for any comments.

You've heard of the phrase "platonic friend" yes?

 

A relationship is like having a sexual friend. In the beginning, you'll be really into each other. It gets "less exciting" as you go along...because seriously, how exciting can sex with the same person be after a year or two?

 

Whether the relationship survives after the initial "honeymoon" stage depends on how compatible the two of you are in areas beyond sex

[pcplod]

While being compatible beyond sexual compatibility is important, in fact essential, the latter is equally important, whether that starts off with great gusto and then becomes humdrum, or not. What is important is not change in individual's lives but continuing synchronicity between a couple.

 

Unfortunately, that is the issue that kills most relationships or marriages that do fail. You need to be flexible to make it through this life and if you can't or wont then you will not experience a smooth and pleasant ride, to put it mildly.

 

What I would regard as important in all this, is how you feel about yourself, purely about yourself and not about how you feel about how other people may feel about yourself.

 

Do you think you are a frightful bore to yourself? Are you disappointed with yourself? Do you consider yourself an incomplete person, not only in terms of what interests you, are prepared to do, but also in terms of how you think and regard the world around you?

 

Personally, I don't think we are ever finished being a complete person, that there are always psychological and emotional challenges for us to take on and often we need or want to realise those challenges in some sort of practical and demonstrable way. Yet, we will die, still being incomplete beings. The challenge is not arriving at the destination but the process, the journey of trying to get there.

 

Some people will enjoy being on that journey with you, others, for whatever reason, will not. Your challenge is to figure out not only who you are but also who will best fit whatever life you choose for yourself and how that might evolve, between now and the grave, always bearing in mind that it isn't and can't always be within your control.

[BruinFan95]

Because I've never had a girlfriend, I struggle to picture the relationship.

 

My lifestyle is simple. I study. I workout. I like to go for walks. I do community service and school clubs. I like music but can't dance. That's about it.

A lot of the standard date ideas are borring to me (I don't like bowling, art galleries, I hate going to restaurants). Also, I don't want things to get expensive.

 

So now that I'm writing this, I guess I realize that I'm (A) trying to make my life more exciting, (B) trying to picture what a relationship could be.

 

I know these are stupid questions. Thanks for any comments.

 

Easy, don't do those boring dates then. I see only negativity here, what are some positive things you want in a significant other?

 

Do you even know what you're looking for in a woman or what date ideas interest you? If not then that's a reason you can't picture yourself in a relationship. You want someone that falls in line with who you are naturally.

 

You like working out, get a woman who likes that too. You're a cheap bastard then get a low maintenance woman. I would love a woman who workouts and sits on the couch with me to watch Parks and Rec and smoke a few bowls. I've found one who likes one but never both. But you're too picky and seeing how you never been in a relationship, you need experience. What if you find your ideal woman but seeing how you lack experience you can lose her. Opportunities are only great if you are prepared to seize them, ya get me? I was like you, like really similar to you. I felt that I knew who i was looking for but until I actually got out there and tried different relationships, I really didn't know. Each experience changes you man, and changes what you value and look for. You want an exciting life, get outside your comfort zone. "If you're aren't uncomfortable, you aren't growing as a person."