SuperGeek Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Then you my friend are quite lucky. Some of us just don't get those kind of vibes from women ever. Usually women are looking the other way, hurrying out the door, etc etc. I find it much easier to approach girls who have shown a notable interest in me rather than ones I have a notable interest in. They are usually far more receptive.
Suave Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Then you my friend are quite lucky. Some of us just don't get those kind of vibes from women ever. Usually women are looking the other way, hurrying out the door, etc etc. Heh, looks fade my friend. That is why we need to become social experts while we can.
Esoteric Elf Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I corrected your grammar because what you wrote and what you probably intended were two different things, and I might have misunderstood you otherwise. If I were concentrating only on grammar, I would have pointed out your use of "badly" as incorrect. Grammar is not my concern unless I can't get at your meaning. Quite frankly that is insulting. I don't know who you think you are to make up such wild theories about me. I don't need your pity- save it for yourself. Sorry, I just went off of what you wrote. Perhaps you meant something different than you wrote again? I have my reasons as to why I ask guys out. It has to do with my type of workplace, and what kind of people I'm exposed to. Though obviously you didn't bother to find that out before you started jumping to conclusions. Again, I go off of what you wrote. You said: "I've approached the shy guys because I find guys unlike me interesting". This is slightly confusing, but the structure is hinting that you approach shy guys because any other guy would dislike you, which, to me, is sad that you have to approach guys because your first choice(s) are not receptive. I don't know why loyalty and empathy are not boring. Maybe in that case, I am a boring person because I like boring qualities in guys. Because I'm not doing any bar hopping and banging the hot players left and right. Because I'm not attracted to guys who have 10 girlfriends all simultaneously. Boring is a charged word these days. I am an extremely shy guy who has shed tears in the presence of girls he has liked, and I suppose I could label myself as "boring" comparatively speaking.
salparadise Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I am curious about a few things in your post. How do you tell the difference between a woman who is caught up in the attentions of multiple men (an attention whore as I have seen such women called here) and a woman who is just a social butterfly and genuinely just enjoys people or new conversations? Would there be a compelling difference in your observations if you knew inside what she was thinking? If you knew that rather than thinking, "All these guys want me, I am hot stuff!" she was actually thinking, "People are so interesting, I just love getting to know what makes folks tick!" On a slightly different note, how do you tell the difference between a woman who is sending "players packing" and is thinking, "I really wish men these douche bags would quit trying to get in my pants so I could talk to that nice dude over there." and a woman who is thinking "I can't believe the audacity of these guys, I am way too good for all of them." In other words, if you saw a woman you perceived as beautiful reject man after man that approaches, would you actually be inclined to approach her? I am really interested in your response. At first blush, it appears that a woman can't really win. If she is nice and kind to all the men that talk to her, she is an attention whore. If she rejects all the men that approach then she is stuck up. What is your ideal scenario and how do you think women should respond? These distinctions you're asking about are not hard to discern for men (or women) who are able to read cues have a bit of experience with people. They're actually quite different behaviors and cues exist in everything from attire to body language and facial expressions. Granted, some women are more transparent than others, and some people read the cues better than others, but people emit a vibe that is readable by other people. Most women are masterful at transmitting signals, partly subconscious, to either encourage or discourage the kind of male attention they desire. They're also good at affirming or rejecting in the same manner once approached. What they're not usually good at is being deceptive about the kind of attention they're trying to attract. Excerpt from Woman Woman, 1968, Gary Puckett and the Union Gap: A woman wears a certain look When she is on the move And a man can always tell what's on her mind I hate to have to say it But that look's all over you Woman oh woman Have you got cheating on your mind 1
AKisBaked Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 PUA approach girls and destroy the rest of the competition.
jma500 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 I have never approached women. I always thought that women wouldn't want a guy like me approaching them. A poster recently told me i have been lying to myself and after some thought i believe he is right. After all i have had several women become close friends . If not for negative beliefs a couple of those ladies could have become girlfriends. No woman i have ever spoken to at home, on photoshoots in nyc, quebec city, boston, etc. has ever been nasty, rude, or called me a creep. So the above mentioned poster must be correct.
Author Tinie Posted May 30, 2013 Author Posted May 30, 2013 @Esoteric elf- Ah, I see, a slight misunderstanding. I do get a lot of guys approaching me, however I am usually attracted to the shy guys, mostly because they don't come over and talk to me, and I am intrigued. I suppose because I find them mysterious. And guys who come up to me make things too easy and I don't value them. I like a little challenge. Most of my female friends are like that too. And they've asked guys out, so it's really not as rare of an occurrence as you think. I go crazy over the vulerable guys. So if I saw a guy crying, my heart would melt and I'd probably break down myself. I don't know why I find that attractive, but I think it's because my personality is very dominant and protective so I want to be the one protecting my man. I know it sounds weird, but that's how I am...
hppr Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 No woman i have ever spoken to at home, on photoshoots in nyc, quebec city, boston, etc. has ever been nasty, rude, or called me a creep. So the above mentioned poster must be correct. Yeah if they don't like you trust me they will let you know. I never got called creep but I did get to hear every variation of the term 'ugly' under the Sun. Any time I read/hear people talking about how girls 'don't care about looks' I get a chuckle out of it.
jma500 Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 Yeah if they don't like you trust me they will let you know. I never got called creep but I did get to hear every variation of the term 'ugly' under the Sun. Any time I read/hear people talking about how girls 'don't care about looks' I get a chuckle out of it. I have never been called ugly and i used to be roughly 40 pounds overweight. Women still liked me and i thought i was homely. So i do not know what to tell you.
phineas Posted May 30, 2013 Posted May 30, 2013 (edited) I am curious about a few things in your post. How do you tell the difference between a woman who is caught up in the attentions of multiple men (an attention whore as I have seen such women called here) and a woman who is just a social butterfly and genuinely just enjoys people or new conversations? Would there be a compelling difference in your observations if you knew inside what she was thinking? If you knew that rather than thinking, "All these guys want me, I am hot stuff!" she was actually thinking, "People are so interesting, I just love getting to know what makes folks tick!" On a slightly different note, how do you tell the difference between a woman who is sending "players packing" and is thinking, "I really wish men these douche bags would quit trying to get in my pants so I could talk to that nice dude over there." and a woman who is thinking "I can't believe the audacity of these guys, I am way too good for all of them." In other words, if you saw a woman you perceived as beautiful reject man after man that approaches, would you actually be inclined to approach her? I am really interested in your response. At first blush, it appears that a woman can't really win. If she is nice and kind to all the men that talk to her, she is an attention whore. If she rejects all the men that approach then she is stuck up. What is your ideal scenario and how do you think women should respond? Simple. Zero attempt at real conversation & full-on macking. Putting their arm around her waist, when she went to the bar, telling her she's hot, touching her ass & telling her how nice it was. buying her drinks. guys just rudely sitting down at our table shouting over the music, putting their arm around her wanting to take her up to the bar to do shots. Asking if she wants to go out to the parking lot then still talking to them. Lot's of grandstanding between the men hooting & whistling & pointing at her. The one group of guys were actually making bets on who could dance with her first & she was clearly enjoying all the attention. As soon as the first guy just walked up & put his arm around her & she didn't take it off it was like open season. She is honestly just that hot. But I was so turned off and by the end of the night it was just us until some fat guy came over & I was gonna bail but this guy was so desperate he was buying me drinks to stay because he knew if I left she'd go also. I stayed for the free drinks. sue me. LOL! These were 40+ aged men acting like complete idiots. What really blew my mind was that for months after she would email me about how much fun she had hanging out with me & how funny I was, ect. Then she'd try flirting with me & i'd just keep it friendly & not go there. And like I said the last few times I had been out with her she polity disengaged any guy who came onto her a few times & mostly just talked to me. I know she didn't spend all that time talking to me just to keep the wolves at bay either. LOL! Like I said she either changed, or is putting a good girl act on for me for some reason. Oh and the times I hung out with her when she had a BF (she had been legally separated for a number of yrs), that guy would not let her talk to any other guy. Every time she'd say "hi" to me he'd put his arm around her & try to bust on me. when we were talking he had to one-up me on everything. Whatever. I lol'd. Insecure as hell. Edited May 30, 2013 by phineas
Author Tinie Posted May 31, 2013 Author Posted May 31, 2013 You've been brainwashed. You're going to be very unhappy with the type of relationship you've just described. If you're really into shy guys who cry and look to you for protection good luck to you. These guys often like to be chased and don't pick up on signals so you're probably going to have to bully them into a relationship. That's the way they want it though. That's actually not what I said. Here's Esoteric Elf's post: "Boring is a charged word these days. I am an extremely shy guy who has shed tears in the presence of girls he has liked, and I suppose I could label myself as "boring" comparatively speaking." That's something I find attractive in a man. I never said I want a guy who is crying and looking for my protection like a child. I am protective of anyone and everyone I love. Some boyfriend of my best friend started physically harassing her and being grabby when she didn't want it, coming up to her and making out with her after she broke it off with him, and if I didn't care about being kicked out of uni, I would have beaten his balls so bad they'd have turned blue. Shy guys do pick up on signals. I know a shy guy who's picked up on mine and he's responding to them in a good way. I like guys who are more quiet and introverted. But maybe that's because most of my guy friends are extroverts who spend their lives at the gym, bar hop, brag about how much alcohol they can guzzle in one sitting, and hit on girls. The best guys I get along with are my introvert guy friends. I wasn't talking about crybabies.
salparadise Posted May 31, 2013 Posted May 31, 2013 Shy guys do pick up on signals. I know a shy guy who's picked up on mine and he's responding to them in a good way. I like guys who are more quiet and introverted. But maybe that's because most of my guy friends are extroverts who spend their lives at the gym, bar hop, brag about how much alcohol they can guzzle in one sitting, and hit on girls. The best guys I get along with are my introvert guy friends. ^^^ :love: 1
Author Tinie Posted June 4, 2013 Author Posted June 4, 2013 The OP has to realize that some guys just don't know what to say I do realize that. Unfortunately that doesn't get the guys in question anywhere.
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