LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 The last thing my ex said was 'Having a relationship shouldn't be this hard, you won't hear from me again' And thats how he ended it. I replied, it was a pretty long message, I told how he has been treating me like a doormat and takes me for granted. I told him how much I loved him but it seems to be a waste because he doesn't appreciate it or enjoy it. At the end of the message I told him that I'll leave him alone and that there is no need to reply.... I'm kicking myself now, I shouldn't have told him not to reply. I needed a reply, even if it was one that I didn't want. Now I'm tempted to contact him.
Kristopher1 Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I'm kicking myself now, I shouldn't have told him not to reply. I needed a reply, even if it was one that I didn't want. Now I'm tempted to contact him. I think if it was important to him, he would have responded regardless of what you said. I get the urge to send my ex a message nearly every day, to tell her how much she's betrayed me and messed me up. However I will not do that, I can't, I wont. She has to come forward now as I've done my part, no more chasing. I urge you to not contact him, it won't make you feel better and you will definitely regret it. 2
aisuru Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 Get a journal. Write in the journal. I promise you that every time you write to him when he doesn't want to hear from you, will push him much further away and make you feel worse. He does NOT deserve to hear or know what you're feeling. He needs to think you are having the time of your life, unaffected by the breakup. Do not do anything that makes it obvious you are dwelling on him and heartbroken. They don't want to hear it. Why harm yourself in that? You're not going to force him to see the light. Journal. Stat.
Flatline Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 You will kick yourself in the head and set yourself back even more. Let's start over again with that NC, shall we? No more breaks. The ball is in his court. Definitely you will regret contacting him again when it amounts to nothing. Save yourself further pain and try to let go for today. Keep busy hour by hour. Baby steps.
Author LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 I won't contact him. I just can't help thinking that he would have replied if I hadn't have said that!
aisuru Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I won't contact him. I just can't help thinking that he would have replied if I hadn't have said that! Nope, he wouldn't have. There is nothing magical you can say that will make him reply or not reply. He already checked out. Nada, zip, zilch.
geegirl Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I won't contact him. I just can't help thinking that he would have replied if I hadn't have said that! Telling him not to reply shouldn't stop him from wanting to, if he cared to reply. How much more of this? Going on for far too long. Expecting him to be this person you need him to be but he won't and can't. You're upset he treated you like a doormat? Not his fault but yours. After all the crap he's done, when do you say enough? Go back and read your many many threads. What's changed? Nothing. No amount of anything anyone can say because you still insist in engaging this clown no matter how much advice you've gotten, even after the last time he treated you like nothing. 1
cavalier99 Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 And if he replies then what? More and more meanigless contact that prevents your healing. Just stay NC. Cav 1
Author LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 Telling him not to reply shouldn't stop him from wanting to, if he cared to reply. How much more of this? Going on for far too long. Expecting him to be this person you need him to be but he won't and can't. You're upset he treated you like a doormat? Not his fault but yours. After all the crap he's done, when do you say enough? Go back and read your many many threads. What's changed? Nothing. No amount of anything anyone can say because you still insist in engaging this clown no matter how much advice you've gotten, even after the last time he treated you like nothing. I agree with everything you're saying. It's my own fault. I allowed him to treat me like crap. I really am done with him. I can't live like this anymore. It isn't healthy, he isn't healthy, we're not healthy together.
Simon Phoenix Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I won't contact him. I just can't help thinking that he would have replied if I hadn't have said that! No he wouldn't have. What you said wouldn't affect that in any way, shape or form. 1
geegirl Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I agree with everything you're saying. It's my own fault. I allowed him to treat me like crap. I really am done with him. I can't live like this anymore. It isn't healthy, he isn't healthy, we're not healthy together. You have to believe what you're saying and be steadfast in being done because you know you don't want this toxicity in your life. You've been doing this for too long, Lost.
Author LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 No he wouldn't have. What you said wouldn't affect that in any way, shape or form. I know that deep down. I just need to stop with the obsessive thoughts, because once they start the urges to contact him start....
Author LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 You have to believe what you're saying and be steadfast in being done because you know you don't want this toxicity in your life. You've been doing this for too long, Lost. I do. I'm done. He isn't going to change. I'm hurt, I'm back to square one, my mind is completely ****ed from all the games, and I'll be posing on here but I'm actually a little relieved. I'm drained. No more.
CelticGibson Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 Try to remember that the longer you stay stuck with this toxicity, you are preventing yourself from meeting someone who will want you as much as you want them. By accepting it's over and moving on, you are one step closer to the happiness you deserve. 1
Author LostGirl11 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 Try to remember that the longer you stay stuck with this toxicity, you are preventing yourself from meeting someone who will want you as much as you want them. By accepting it's over and moving on, you are one step closer to the happiness you deserve. We're done. For good. I'm tired. Yeah, I'll be posting because I'm heartbroken, because I need the support but I don't want anyone thinking that I don't want to move on, because I do. More than anything. It's just going to take some time getting there. Probably twice as long as last time, but I'll get there. I hope.
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