LostOne1 Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 So I accidentally got onto my ex's FB page. It's a long story on how I got there.. but I did... I then found new pictures of her in the same place with this guy I heard she cheated on me with a year ago. None of the pictures posted had her and the guy together. But based off the comments and all.. it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure it out. I gotta say it's kinda good knowing she did cheat on me. Why? Because I never knew the story. One moment it was she cheated on me, the other it was she didn't. But I think now that I know it's good and bad. Good, because I KNOW what really happened. Fact is she was needy and this guy gave her full attention. She liked it and chose him over me after being with me for 3 yrs. And the whole time she lied to me and behind my back. Bad, because I'm obviously single still and since she found someone it seems like she got the better end of the deal for now. But who knows about the future.. I guess it also sucks to know some other guy is sleeping with her. I gotta say it sounds funny and sad at the same time. Funny, because he gets my sloppy seconds, and sad because at the end of the day she is with him and not me. Being at 1 year almost reminds me that her and me were not very compatible. And, I think that is by far the hardest part to live with. The fact that the life she wanted is what this guy can give her or is a life she wants. The life I wanted is one I think she never wanted, but she took it because only I was in it and she felt that was good enough. So I've learned to let go to the fact that she has found her happiness, though she had to hurt me to get it. I look at everyday as a new day to find my happiness too. For once I don't feel pain of knowing she cheated on me and chose another guy over me. I'm relived knowing she DID cheat on me and sadly never had the guts to tell me. But now I KNOW she did cheat, and I'm okay with it knowing she wasn't worth it. It's now allowed me to judge a girl properly, and what to look for and THAT it's okay to leave a girl if I feel she isn't the one. My career has gotten better and now I'm just looking for my happiness in finding someone that I can connect with once again. And I hope like her I can find someone that wants the life I want and can relate to me. I gained a lot from being with her and at the same time learned lots from losing her. So for those that are broken hearted.. let me tell you when you reach 1 year of the break up. Things get easier and better and you will see how far you have come through the pain. I've healed from the fact that her and I are OVER pretty much forever. BUT, what it does give me is a chance and hope to find someone better than her. I've met some very amazing people, I've learned and gained better social skills. I've tried to improve quite a lot and am a lot healthier than I was before. So if your feeling hopeless and down. Just remember, that someone out there (me) went through it too. And I lived and survived, though it was hard I made it. And that we all WILL be happy and find someone. But don't give up and just fake it till you make it.
Author LostOne1 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 "LostOne" is lost no more! haha I'm still a little lost, I mean life is still not steady. But the thing is I've realized it's OKAY to be lost at times. We freak out when we are lost or unsure of something. But, we eventually find our way, then might get lost again etc.. it's normal, but for now I know I'm strong, okay and I will survive. I can look at myself in the mirror and tell myself I am one strong mofo! haha
s.a.i.n.t. Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 thanks for the update, after i give this one last letter going to restart NC.
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