Roxy1689 Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 I have been talkin to this guy for a little over two months. We have known each other for around eight months. I stay at his house with him 4 to 5 nights a week. We sleep in the same bed, pick on each other, joke around and have recently started going places together. We rarely kiss, it took him a month to simply give me a small kiss. He has made it clear that he isn't talkin to any other girls and that I'm off limits to his friends. This is the dumbest question ever but I want to make it official and I'm scared of running him off. Things r going great but since he isn't very affectionate in the line of kissing and stuff I'm worried I would be pushing things. How can I bring it up?
BluEyeL Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 Sounds very unusual. Sleeping in the same bed? Overnight? And nothing sexual happens? It sounds like he's not attracted to you physically....but maybe we need more details.
Author Roxy1689 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 We have slept together one time about three weeks ago and then things went back to normal and he claims it's cuz he is really shy. He has made it clear to me that we r more than just friends but I dunno how far it goes.
Adele0908 Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 I have been talkin to this guy for a little over two months. We have known each other for around eight months. I stay at his house with him 4 to 5 nights a week. We sleep in the same bed, pick on each other, joke around and have recently started going places together. We rarely kiss, it took him a month to simply give me a small kiss. He has made it clear that he isn't talkin to any other girls and that I'm off limits to his friends. This is the dumbest question ever but I want to make it official and I'm scared of running him off. Things r going great but since he isn't very affectionate in the line of kissing and stuff I'm worried I would be pushing things. How can I bring it up? First off, why are you at his house 4 or 5 nights a week? That is too much. You have to pace yourself with dating. Once or twice a week is enough time to spend with someone when you just started dating. If you keep being so available, he might take you for granted. You can get bored of a person if you see them too much. Second, I personally don't think it's a good idea to bring it up. It might make you look desperate. Not saying you are, but it could look that way. What I personally would do, is just pull back and not see him as much. Stop seeing him 4 or 5 nights a week. Be less available. Basically, increase the attraction between you two by letting him miss you. When he starts to miss you, then he might want to make things more official. If he doesn't fear losing you, then nothing would change, but if he fears losing you, then he might be *inspired* to take things to the next level.
Woohoo Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 Run, run away. If you are so desperate to be loved you will put up with that, then you are in a dangerous place. Seriously, that is not a relationship and something is very wrong with him.
MrRightNow Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 Sounds like this guy is either inexperienced and clueless, or he doesn't like you as much as you like him. Either way, I wouldn't bring it up. Take Adele's advice and back off for a bit.
apple OR orange Posted May 26, 2013 Posted May 26, 2013 If he has aspergers syndrome then this would be a 100% for what's going on. I would put him through an on line free test, that will show, if its does now you have to change your thinking pattern with regards how he will act in a relationship. He wont be voicing his inner desire to sleep with you. I know someone almost identical to what your doing and they have been together over 10 years (they live together though).
Author Roxy1689 Posted May 26, 2013 Author Posted May 26, 2013 Let me go into a lot more detail. I think I need to explain more. When I first met this guy I was immediately attracted. We knew each other around 6 months or so before we started talkin. I had a boyfriend and had broken up with him. This new guy.. We will call him bob.. Messaged me wantin to gang out and I blew him off cuz I didn't want any drama from the recent break up. Well bout a week later I gave in... We hang out 4 to 5 times a week... It's mutual on who initiates it. Yes I stay the night almost every night I see him cuz we stay up so late. Both night owls. We text every day. I found out from friends that they could always tell there was an attraction between the two of us. It took him around a month to kiss me and it was a simple kiss on the cheek. Bout 2 weeks after that we both got completely drunk and slept together. Since then there has been nothin but random cuddling and flirting, it's almost as though we never slept together. I'm extremely shy and he claims he is too. We have only been talkin a little over 2 months. He has made a point to let me know he isn't talkin to any other girls. Btw he lives with his parents so I see them allll the time. We were at a bar tofethèr a few weeks ago and one of his buddies tried taking me home behind his back and he made it clear that I was off limits. I know we r more than just friends and I think what has me worried is that he seems shy in the sexual aspect that he hasn't tried sleeping with me again or even foreplay. We only goof around and he picks on me by pinching my boobs and stuff or grabbing my butt. I'm so used to each guy I talk to always trying to sleep with me immediately that this guy taking his time and being respectful has me bewildered. Please do not judge the way we do things... I'm happy seeing him this much and so is he... I'm not neccisarily asking for him to put a label on our relationship but I basically want the reassurance that he feels the same way and maybe he is just tryin to be respectful and maybe feel me out better and do the right thing to not run me off. On the other hand he may not be attracted to me... But then why am I the only girl around that he still flirts with? And another thing y'all... This guy is a body builder who works out every day.. I dunno if that makes a difference but my mom said maybe he has a low sex drive.
Recommended Posts