I've realize I acted crazy on ex boyfriend and now I want to know if I can fix anythi

[joygirl73]

I've realize I acted crazy on ex boyfriend and now I want to know if I can fix anything...

 

I broke up with him because he was texting with the other girl (he texted her "I miss u", "keep it tight" and sent her picture of his pool). I knew it was not just friendly text message because he did same thing to me while he was in relationship with him. Later that night, he took me to home and I was still confused but I let the thoughts of cheating for a little while because he told me that she was just his friend and did not make any physical contact. Me and him was in my bedroom siting on top of each other with clothes on and my sister walked in my room saw the scene.

 

My sister yelled at us to break off. I told my ex to just leave and that was the last thing that I remember as a couple with him. I had intercourse with him and I told my family about that after I sent him off. My family asked me if I want to get marry to him and I told them no. Later that evening my ex texted how is everything and I told him what I talked about with my family. he responded if I planned for this for the marriage. I never planned anything like that with him throughout the relationship and I was shocked how he turned to cold turkey after the marriage talk. I broke up with him couple days later. This relationship was my first serious relationship so I broke up with him not knowing that I will miss him.

 

Couple days later I told him I miss him and want to get back together. (We been dating for 8 months...) He told me he needs some space. I never understood why he need space to think (again I admit I started to act desperate and needy because it was my first relationship) I kept calling on him more than 30 times and I eventually called his step mom so I can talk to him. I did not realize that moment how I was acting so stupid but kept making same mistakes because I never had boyfriend like him in my life (I was actually in love with him). He told me it's better for us to go separate way since we have different value in our life. But I insist him that I will meet his value but he kept telling me that it is not working out.

 

I drove to his home about a week later and telling him to rethink about the relationship and telling him that I don't think him and I was not ready for the marriage since we did not have place of our own but we can work it out when we get back to relationship and also did have different view for having kids ( he wanted them but I was not ready for the kids I told him I will be ready when we get back ) and telling him to call my family to say the things I told him to say I broke down on him crying so bad... that evening I returned to my home late and my family was asking me where was I.

 

I told my family that I was at school ( I am college student and he had his first stable job ) but they knew I spent the time with him because he called my family and had the talk. He also lied that I was not there but like cliche, my mom knew that I spent the time with him. My family had bad feeling about him since he lied to them about me spending time with him. Whether I made him or not, my family believed he should not lie what so ever. My family told me to leave the house for good if I want to continue to see him if not I should not make any contact with him. In the meanwhile, my ex texted me that he is not feeling good about this relationship and told me once again that we should go separate way. I kept calling and text him and he eventually said don't call him anymore... I felt rejected from not only from him but with my family at the same time.

 

I felt really depressed and attempted suicide very next day... My professor took me to counseling center at my school and I was still in confusion... I felt really angry that all the things I've tried did not worked out in the way I wanted. in the april's fools day I lied to my ex that I was HIV positive and I meant to ruin his day or two. he was upset and told me he wasted his money for the testing... I could not believe he would believe my jokes but not believe that we have future together... I kept texting him to take off all the photos that we took each other from his facebook and tell him that he is coward and was not being manlike. He strike me back telling me I am psycho and I am stalking him and he will put the restraining order against me if I keep contact him. I took a couple weeks of break with the contact and made contact telling him we should not argue like who can get more ugly. he agreed but he made sure he was not going back to relationship.

 

I was making too much apology and lowered my self-esteem as I was going through depression. He didn't like it. I met him for the last time for the lunch and we had some laugh but I talked about break ups and he didn't like that conversation. he made sure that he is not going back to relationship I told him I understand him without accepting his decision.I tried to show off he made wrong decision about me ever since the break up.

 

Now he does even respond to my text message. I got to admit that I still have feelings for him but this time I can work out things better. can I still fix anything to make him talk?

Edited May 25, 2013 by a LoveShack.org Moderator
paragraphs added

[MrRightNow]

I think you need to move on with your life. Don't humiliate yourself over this guy. The fact that he was texting other girls and his recent behavior suggests he's no longer interested. Don't ruin your relationship with your family over him. Romantic relationships rarely last, family is more important. You're young and in college, don't waste these years being depressed over some guy. You'll regret it later. Make the most of your college experience and enjoy your youth. You'll find someone better eventually.

[joygirl73]

This is update for the story

 

Me: I still love you but I can't do anything about it when you do not want anything with me, I wish you the best for your life

EX: U too

EX: And sorry