Col1 Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 If in a relationship: is eyerolling a partner a sign that it's time to end it? (Implying: "that's a dumb idea" or even "you're an idiot.") Probably not a match in manners between the two partners, even though there is a lot of chemistry.
Kelemvor Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Yes, it's impending disaster. It usually portends "Look...we need to talk..." within 10 or so days, + or - 2. Get out now. If any part of the person's name contains either "Jodi" or "Arias" or close variants...hide the kitchenware.
ChessPieceFace Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 If in a relationship: is eyerolling a partner a sign that it's time to end it? (Implying: "that's a dumb idea" or even "you're an idiot.") Probably not a match in manners between the two partners, even though there is a lot of chemistry. Interesting. Guess it would depend on the context and frequency of eyerolling, but the idea definitely has merit. 1
xorro Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Shoot.. I think I'm an eye-roller. If someone's doing it in absolute seriousness, yes, it's pretty disrespectful. Which is never a good thing. They're basically invalidating whatever you're feeling. If the couple is very comfortable with each other, and do it in a semi-teasing way, or when only mildly-irritated, then I think it's ok. Vital difference. 1
Almond_Joy Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Some people are just harsh with their words. I grew up in a household where I was spoken to harshly, so being called an idiot wasn't really an indicator that someone didn't love or care about you. They just called you like they saw it in a harsh way. If you want to stay with her stand your ground and tell her to stop talking to you like that if you don't like it. She can disagree with you without berating you. And if you continue to let her berate you without defending yourself, then yes this probably could be the beginning of the end. Most women I know don't like a man who lets himself be treated poorly.
Author Col1 Posted May 25, 2013 Author Posted May 25, 2013 Some people are just harsh with their words. Non-verbal communication (eyerolling, for example) conveys that person's inner feelings. Eyerolling shows a level of contempt for another person. Maybe the person who rolls eyes at others needs a partner who'll roll eyes right back. They'd be a match. 1
Almond_Joy Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Non-verbal communication (eyerolling, for example) conveys that person's inner feelings. Eyerolling shows a level of contempt for another person. Maybe the person who rolls eyes at others needs a partner who'll roll eyes right back. They'd be a match. Yes, it does. But as I said that does not mean that person doesn't love or care about the person they're rolling their eyes at. People do hurtful things when they're angry or frustrated whether they love you or not. If you feel like should be with like.....and you don't roll your eyes......what does that say to you about the relationship? If you want to break up with her over this then do it. I was just saying it's not unforgivable or irreparable in my experience.
Author Col1 Posted May 25, 2013 Author Posted May 25, 2013 Women who accept rude treatment from men are on the path to an abusive relationship. It can start with small things like non-verbal disrepect, and then escalate. 2
Vinegar Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 yes, this is a sign of disrespect and can lead to abuse. My ex use to roll his eyes at me and he was very abusive.
apple OR orange Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 well spotted, yes i would say you have a problem, you never see "wow, great sex [eyeroll]" do you. Its the opposite of "i want sex with you" so i would say shes going to browse other guys at some point.
Shepp Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 I hope not...everyone rolls there eyes at me all the time! ...even my own mum!! I guess there's teasing/messign about eyerolling and downright rude eyerolling - I guess if its the latter you might have a problem! 1
Geiss Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 I eyerolled my friend because he was being an idiot and then he said don't you eyeroll me. Shortly after we stopped talking altogether. So yes it is possible eyerolling could be the beginning of the end.
tbf Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Eyerolling is as much the beginning of the end, as anger or a frowny face.
Janesays Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 There was actually a study done on this a few years back. Apparently, eye rolling was a bigger indicator of impending divorce than an affair. I always found that particular study interesting. 1
Charlie Harper Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Eye rolling is a sure sign of Disaster, I even read somewhere that after eye rolling most couples won't last more than 36 months, I am not making this up.
pcplod Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Just ask, "May I have a translation, please? Just for the record". 1
tbf Posted May 25, 2013 Posted May 25, 2013 Eye rolling isn't indicative of the end. People need to clearly understand that negative body language is only one of the four possible indicators of a marriage in trouble, of which one might be eye rolling. Wish people and the media would explain and understand theories without ridiculous simplifications. Having said that, one wonders about sellers like Gottman. I use the term "seller" because he's selling his marriage counseling theories same as Dr. Phil and a few others who oversimplify relationships and marriages. Instead of controlling for differences, they use empirical observations where while there maybe correlations, causation is presumed through hasty generalizations. So annoying.
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