How do I prevent my shyness from increasing guys´fear of rejection?

[Cfb770099]

I´m very shy and usually don´t like to show too much interest in people too fast when I first meet them.

 

This is not the first time I find myself in a similar situation: A guy likes me (like I can clearly see he´s interested) and I like him but he never makes a move! I think the problem is my incapacity to show the guys that I DO want them to make a move on me. Instead, I just seem to increase their fear of rejection. I understand that my shyness can sometimes be perceived as lack of interest and I think it in general just confuses people and I end up coming across as difficult to approach.

 

What is the best way for me to show guys that their interest for me is mutual?

For instance I´m considering writing to a guy I met recently and whom I´ve been chit-chatting with quite a lot lately, is that an off- putting way to go about it (I mean showing my interest in him by writing to him instead of using my body language and expressions like extrovert people do)?

 

I seems like even though I´m trying hard, I simply cannot get my message across and everything would be so much easier if I was just a bit more extrovert!

 

(NB this is not about fixing shyness, introvert is just the way I am )

Edited May 24, 2013 by Cfb770099

[jolie_baby]

I´m very shy and usually don´t like to show too much interest in people too fast when I first meet them.

 

This is not the first time I find myself in a similar situation: A guy likes me (like I can clearly see he´s interested) and I like him but he never makes a move! I think the problem is my incapacity to show the guys that I DO want them to make a move on me. Instead, I just seem to increase their fear of rejection. I understand that my shyness can sometimes be perceived as lack of interest and I think it in general just confuses people and I end up coming across as difficult to approach.

 

What is the best way for me to show guys that their interest for me is mutual?

For instance I´m considering writing to a guy I met recently and whom I´ve been chit-chatting with quite a lot lately, is that an off- putting way to go about it (I mean showing my interest in him by writing to him instead of using my body language and expressions like extrovert people do)?

 

I seems like even though I´m trying hard, I simply cannot get my message across and everything would be so much easier if I was just a bit more extrovert!

 

(NB this is not about fixing shyness, introvert is just the way I am )

 

 

My two cents...

 

I am in general a shy girl too... (or at least have been for a long time...) and with time I realized that when you want to reciprocate interest, it is better to stick to the already established way of communication, whether its verbal (chit chatting as you said) or if you usually email, or text...

 

Even for a shy girl, if you already chit chat with the guy, just show him little signs, touch his arm, say you are going for coffee and whether he likes to join, simply talk about your plans for the coming days and say something like, would you like to join or something... as simple as that... and a guy who is really interested would get that... no need to exaggerate anything...