jennaf Posted May 24, 2013 Posted May 24, 2013 We both went to a smaller high school, but never interacted or spoke. The night of our graduation, we began talking and really got along. We started dating, and I fell fast and hard, as he was my first boyfriend. We were both saying I love you by two months. Although we weren't going to the same college, we were headed to the same city with only a short commute between our schools. First semester worked really well. We saw each other every week, if not twice a week. But, when second semester came along things got tougher. I joined a sorority and he joined a fraternity. Although neither of us were tempted by other guys/girls, his pledging process was long, time consuming, and draining. I saw less of him, heard less from him, and when we were together he was tired and constantly being called away. But, we still loved each other. I got through the semester by just thinking about summer and getting to spend the whole time back at home with him. I know these feelings weren't one sided. He would always talk about how he couldn't wait to just be done with pledging and get home and be with me. We made plans for the summer and I genuinely thought we were both excited to reconnect. I always thought he loved me. He didn't just say it-- I thought he really meant it. We did come from very different families/backgrounds. I never got along with his friends, and he never got along with mine. But, he always insisted it didn't matter because he loved me. I was the first girl he felt proud to call his girlfriend-- all of his brothers knew who I was even before I met them and he was always showing me off to his friends at school. He always told me how he loved me because I challenged him to be a better person. Less than a week into our time at home, he broke up with me. All he said was "I simply don't feel the same way about you anymore." Before the breakup, I was expecting a fight. I was frustrated because we hadn't spend that much time together since we had gotten home. But, I wasn't expecting him to end it. I am beyond broken and a mess, as I didn't see this coming. Even the night before the breakup, we went on a date and had a great time. I thought the distance I felt with him was due to his pledging, but never questioned that he still loved me. I guess I just don't see how it was so easy for him to walk away? He didn't want to work things out or talk, he just broke it off. I met up with him two days after, and he already wouldn't get near me and talked to me like I was a stranger. I called him a week later, and he didn't pick up or respond. I know he didn't meet another girl... my only possible explanation is that he never loved me at all? Because even though I was tired and we have our problems, I loved him enough to work on them. Why was it so easy for him to walk away from everything we shared and felt for each other, unless he never really felt anything at all?
Echo000 Posted May 24, 2013 Posted May 24, 2013 two things. 1. its quite easy to move on when you dont love the person anymore. Your heart doesnt feel that love, so you no longer hold that special place in his heart. This takes the break out of heartbreak. "I simply don't feel the same way about you anymore." Enough said. 2. Everyone shows their pain differently. Just because he appears to be totally okay and fine, does not mean that is true. I went cold, complete NC for four months straight. Still loved and cared about her. Just kept to myself in order to heal. So maybe he doesnt care anymore, but maybe not. Let your mind rest. Most of the things that hurt you are created in your mind, where they will reside until you cleanse yourself with positivity. 1
youngnlove89 Posted May 24, 2013 Posted May 24, 2013 That is the worst feeling: not knowing if they miss you too. Then after that, you just add to it by thinking: they don't miss me, they are fine, they are happy, they don't love me anymore, they have moved on, met someone else etc. But that's all us. That's hurting ourselves. We are adding to it by thinking too much. Reality is sometimes not what we think it is. But the thing is, we won't know. He could be sad. He could miss you. Maybe regret some things. But his actions speak louder. He isn't talking to you for a reason. He either misses you and is doing nothing about it which means he wants to move on. Or He doesn't miss you and doesn't want to talk to you anymore. Either way, it sucks. Don't focus on it too much. This is part of going through a breakup. We just have to deal with the uncomfortable.
Recommended Posts