kitcat123 Posted May 24, 2013 Posted May 24, 2013 I'm desperate for advice, please. ): My ex and I broke up last Sept after dating for 2 years. I initially wanted to break up with him, but he wanted a break instead. 3 months later he starts to ignore me, and avoids seeing me, and I learned later he met another girl. He never told me he was calling off the break, and I never thought that we was going to. I thought that one day we'd just be together officially again, cause this 'break' of ours was just basically us dating still. He ignored me for a good 3-4 weeks in Feb, then in March after desperate pleas from me to have us meet up (I know really bad on my part), we starting hooking up and he was cheating on his ex. It was really a big mess, i wanted to sleep with him because I loved him still, and I hoped that he'd get back with me. In mid March, my ex would drunk text me every now and then and tell me how much he misses me, and how it feels so 'right' to be with me, and that when hes with me he feels like he's home. Clearly that led me to believe that we were gonna get back together, and one of the last text he sent me said that he needed to find a way to break up with his gf, but I was too eager and frustrated with his indecisiveness, so I told him to break up with her by midnight. Lo and behold, he doesn't and the next day we sat down at dinner and he said he's too scared to come back to me because he thinks i'll just break up with him and do the same hurtful things to him again. After that I initiated no contact for 1.5 months. Fast forward to 2 weeks ago, I caved in and called my ex, asked if he still had something of mine (stupid excuse just to talk to him), on the phone he said he's been wanting to contact me but since I initiated no contact, he didn't want to be selfish. He asked me to go get coffee with him, and that he'll text me when. 1 week ago he finally gets around to msging me, and I decided that i should stick with NC, because seeing him hurts too much. He argued with me and told me he was really excited to catch up, and that he's really sorry for leaving me and that he really wants to make it up to me. He thinks that we can be friends, but i love him in a romantic way and it hurts to see him. When i finally saw him I was really bitter and sad, but it was still nice to see him. He invited me to his birthday bar run, and I don't know if i should go or not. Thing is, i still want to get back with him. But my ex once told my sister that the only way he'll get back with me is if we were friends, and he saw that i actually changed. He's dating someone else right now, and I just feel like i dont know if i should be friends with him. I don't want to give him everything he wants, but if what he told my sister was true, then i have to bear through the pain of seeing him, and show that i've changed? right? Help please ): (I'm 20, he's 20)
aisuru Posted May 24, 2013 Posted May 24, 2013 TOO MUCH DRAMA. You're both young so still not good at letting go. Don't you think you deserve more than sleeping with our ex-boyfriend who is now dating somebody else???? And hey, I did the exact same thing when I was your age. Seriously, same story. Very eery. I'm 36 now. Never been married. So you guess how that worked out for me. Actually, we spent the next 15 years meeting up off and on and going on international trips together between our relationships with other people to have lots of wild sex because we get along so well and have great chemistry. He got married two years ago and haven't heard from him since. We could not be trusted together to this day. Just is what it is. Give that some thought.
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