Co Dependant No more? What is this

[Stone]

My theripist i saw yesterday told me to go to a "Co Dependant no more" class I guess it's like a co-dependancy thing... but I don't really know what the hell that means... what it is or what you talk about there... Anybody here ever went to one? Anybody know what the heck it is? I did a search and all I can find is some dammed book for sale.

[disconcertainly]

Codependency is:

 

at it's core, a dysfunctional relationship with self. We do not know how to Love our self in healthy ways because our parents did not know how to Love themselves. We were raised in shame-based societies that taught us that there is something wrong with being human. The messages we got often included that there is something wrong: with making mistakes; with not being perfect; with being sexual; with being emotional; with being too fat or too thin or too tall or too short or too whatever. As children we were taught to determine our worth in comparison with others. If we were smarter than, prettier than, better grades than, faster than, etc. - then we were validated and got the message that we had worth.

In a codependent society everyone has to have someone to look down on in order to feel good about themselves. And, conversely, there is always someone we can compare ourselves to that can cause us to not feel good enough.

 

Hope this helps!

[Stone]

Wow!! Thanks I am not sure if this is me... .... but I do CONSTANTLY find myself in relationships where I take care of men in every way possible..... like a mother. And I do everything possible for other people... I'd take the shirt off my back and give it to a stranger but I do little for myself.. Huh Thanks so much

[wvd]

my ex-girlfriend was that way to me (treating me like she was my mom, taking care of me), which i really needed at the time. i didn't appreciate it until now. you're ex-boyfriends are lucky men.