Kaia92 Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 my ex and I were in an LDR for over 10 months before mutually agreeing to end things about a week ago. We met over a summer and we're really close for about 3 months before we started dating. We go to different colleges about 4 hours apart. Things went really great for the whole relationship and we would see each other about every 6 weeks, we grew even closer and never had any problems. However, he graduated from college and is moving a 4 hour plane ride away while I have one more year of school left before I can join him. We talked it out and decided it was too expensive and difficult to maintain our relationship during this year. Basically we were worried that LDR issues would cause problems that had nothing to do with how much we love each other. He kept telling me how much I meant to him and how much he loves me, saying things like "i'll always love you most". He said that he didnt want to ruin what we have over distance we cant control. And he keeps referring to this break up as "taking time off" or "taking a break" saying we will see what happens. Im really confused as to what he means by this and how im supposed to react. we still talk to each other all the time and things seem really normal, exactly how it used to be. Help!
justwhoiam Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Basically, he doesn't feel like being committed to you. So he can sleep with other girls. And you two are not a couple anymore. Given the situation, you'll be free to date whomever you want, which might lead to falling in love with someone else. If no one of you falls in love with someone else, when he gets back, maybe you might still want to be a couple again. A break can work, but rarely under these terms. So I guess you should stop talking to him and take the break up seriously, before it hurts you really bad. 1
umirano Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Make sure you're not some kind of backup plan, i.e. to keep him entertained as long as he doesn't pick up a new girl in the new city. Usually people who broke up don't talk to each other, and certainly no sweet talk. Are you guys still sweet with each other? Then why the tough talk about break up / taking a break? You don't look to me like you're really over him, you probably just agreed to his idea of taking a break to not completely lose him. See above, you don't want to be a back up. It will suck hard when he dumps you or just goes silent on you and it turns out he has another girl. Be careful, and good luck!
Author Kaia92 Posted May 24, 2013 Author Posted May 24, 2013 Thanks guys. It definitely hurt but I probably needed to hear it. It's all just so confusing to me and I wish I knew once and for all exactly what he was thinking and what he wanted. We are still talking exactly like we used to, sweet talk and all so my brain is just a giant mess and I keep going through weird mood swings over it. One minute I think he did it so as not to hurt me and other I think he's being incredibly selfish. I don't know how to get through this all but hopefully it'll get better
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