ShiningMoon Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 (edited) Hi everyone, I've met this guy on a dating website about 2 months ago. He messaged me first and we instantly hit it off. We talked everyday for about 1 month (mainly him initiating). We met up about 3 weeks ago (it wasn't a date, just a first "meet up"). At the end of this "meet up" he asked me out on a date and I agreed. He sent me a text telling me he had a great time about 15 minutes after I left. Then he kept on sending me messages everyday for a little while. However, I've been noticing some weird changes lately. He doesn't initiate messages anymore (and he barely responded to mine). I have to initiate all contacts now. About a week ago, he suddenly became significantly less active. I decided to deactivate my account for personal reasons and boom, I noticed he suddenly became super active (I know he noticed I was gone). It's like I was bothering him or something. I sent him a little text to tell him I deleted my account from that website, he responded by scheduling a date. However, he hasn't texted me since. He never texts me. However, he is free enough to spend hours on that dating website (check out of curiosity). I get the fact that we just met and I shouldn't overthink this. But I don't think his behavior shows he's even remotely interested in me. And I don't want to waste my time. My question is : I'm looking for something serious, am I just heading for another disappointement? Should I just drop it? I can't seem to figure out what he wants because he's being very evasive. Is this typical behavior of someone who doesn't want something serious/who wants something casual? I know for fact that so far, I'm the only girl he's met through this website because supposedly he didn't click with other girls bla bla bla. Edited May 23, 2013 by ShiningMoon
happydate Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 (edited) Hi everyone, I've met this guy on a dating website about 2 months ago. He messaged me first and we instantly hit it off. We talked everyday for about 1 month (mainly him initiating). We met up about 3 weeks ago (it wasn't a date, just a first "meet up"). At the end of this "meet up" he asked me out on a date and I agreed. He sent me a text telling me he had a great time about 15 minutes after I left. Then he kept on sending me messages everyday for a little while. However, I've been noticing some weird changes lately. He doesn't initiate messages anymore (and he barely responded to mine). I have to initiate all contacts now. About a week ago, he suddenly became significantly less active. I decided to deactivate my account for personal reasons and boom, I noticed he suddenly became super active (I know he noticed I was gone). It's like I was bothering him or something. I sent him a little text to tell him I deleted my account from that website, he responded by scheduling a date. However, he hasn't texted me since. He never texts me. However, he is free enough to spend hours on that dating website (check out of curiosity). I get the fact that we just met and I shouldn't overthink this. But I don't think his behavior shows he's even remotely interested in me. And I don't want to waste my time. My question is : I'm looking for something serious, am I just heading for another disappointement? Should I just drop it? I can't seem to figure out what he wants because he's being very evasive. Is this typical behavior of someone who doesn't want something serious/who wants something casual? I know for fact that so far, I'm the only girl he's met through this website because supposedly he didn't click with other girls bla bla bla. Just a few meets and you are obsessed about his whereabouts, need his attention and even monitoring his activities on the dating site. Why is this a disappointment when he's an adult and he has a life. Maybe he's busy with work or have other commitments he kept before he met you. It's easy to check on dating sites as well. Maybe he is trying to keep tabs on you when he's online because he can't get away from his obligations. Do you think it is reasonable to ask the guy to continually shower you with attention you just met? Maybe you're a little insecure and needy for attention and he sensed that during his meet. Now, he's a bit reluctant to see you cause perhaps of 2 things. He's too shy to call it off, or he may want something slow and casual with you to ascertain if your needy and clingy is just a one-off thing that you just got excited because he's new to you. Either way, we're just speculating here. Just keep dating more and find out more about him. Don't need to write him off. Edited May 23, 2013 by happydate
Zahara Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 I know for fact that so far, I'm the only girl he's met through this website because supposedly he didn't click with other girls bla bla bla. You know for a FACT just because he told you? Don't believe everything people tell you. He's lacking interest. I'd move on. 1
BluEyeL Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Yes, he lost interest. The sooner you move on, the less heartache and trouble for you.
Author ShiningMoon Posted May 23, 2013 Author Posted May 23, 2013 (edited) Honestly, during the meet, I genuinely thought he wouldn't ask me on a date just because I really wasn't interested anymore and it showed. He was doing most of the talking (about himself again and again). And, I was the one who ended the meet after 45 minutes. I was quite distant during the meet, not clingy at all. However, the fact that he asked me out on a date is what kept my interest going. And I'm not monitoring his activities. I just checked once. I'm probably a little clingy because it's new, that's it. Edited May 23, 2013 by ShiningMoon
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