circusrebellion Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 My boyfriend and I have been dating for a little over 2 years. Our relationships has had it's ups and downs like any relationship. Anyway, a few days ago I asked a simple question that sparked an argument that eventually led to us breaking up. The argument was sparked by me but for good reason. I said that I wish he would have talked it out more with me about his decision to join the military. (he's joining the navy soon). I thought it was a reasonable statement. He then went on about how annoying I was and how I was so dramatic about everything. He also mentioned how he resented me from earlier in the relationship for making him do something he didn't want to do. I admitted SEVERAL times after the fact that I was sorry, and how I wished i was more understanding during that time. This argument got very heated and he ended up breaking up with me. He was saying things like he hasn't been happy for awhile, and he was only with me because he was trying to make things work. But my little statement pushed him over the edge. By the end of the night we were both hysterically crying and telling each other that we loved each other and didn't want either of us to go out and date anyone right away. Fast forward a day later. I send him a text asking if he would still give me feed back on my novel whenever I sent him updates, and he said yes he could do that for me. Moving on, I didn't expect much contact from him after that...but then later on in the day he IM'S me and we start talking about our fave tv show like the fight before did not happen. We ended the day saying I love you etc Later on that night I went to his apartment and saw him we kissed several times and said i love you to each other. We saw each other the day before yesterday and the same thing happened. I tried to do more than kiss but he stopped me, but we still kissed! Anyway (later today) around the evening we had/have plans to hang out before i go on a week long trip to nyc. And when I call him to confirm the plans everything is fine, except after i say i love you he doesn't say anything back! Just a second after the phone call he tweets "this **** has got to stop" I'm pretty sure he was talking about me. At this point i don't know what to do. We're still listed as in a relationship on facebook, and as far as i know we're still on for later today. What I want to know however, is how to approach him when we do hang out. Do I ask him if we're together? Or what? This is the second time we've broken up. The first time was six months ago because he didn't think our happiness was real. this is also my first post!
aisuru Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 You're young aren't you? Time for you to be strong. Stop grasping at straws. Give him his space. He feels suffocated. I get it, I've been you. Years and years ago. You want to cling on to him because you feel him slipping away. WRONG. You must give him space to breathe or you will suffocate the life out of this relationship. I know you want answers. Right now, if you want any chance of salvaging this (and seems like you might still have a chance), you absolutely MUST give him some space. Go google about push and pull in relationships. You're both young so it's almost inevitable that this phase will drive you apart. But it is possible for you to get a grip, knock it off, and make it past this phase. Slim chance. But it's possible. IF you stop acting like a desperate needy girlfriend. Sorry, harsh reality, but it's true. SPACE. Be the independent fun girl you were when you met him. And don't tell him that's who you are. BE THAT GIRL. 1
Author circusrebellion Posted May 23, 2013 Author Posted May 23, 2013 You're young aren't you? Time for you to be strong. Stop grasping at straws. Give him his space. He feels suffocated. I get it, I've been you. Years and years ago. You want to cling on to him because you feel him slipping away. WRONG. You must give him space to breathe or you will suffocate the life out of this relationship. I know you want answers. Right now, if you want any chance of salvaging this (and seems like you might still have a chance), you absolutely MUST give him some space. Go google about push and pull in relationships. You're both young so it's almost inevitable that this phase will drive you apart. But it is possible for you to get a grip, knock it off, and make it past this phase. Slim chance. But it's possible. IF you stop acting like a desperate needy girlfriend. Sorry, harsh reality, but it's true. SPACE. Be the independent fun girl you were when you met him. And don't tell him that's who you are. BE THAT GIRL. You are right. I am clingy. Maybe this week apart would be really good on us.
Recommended Posts