Author rricardo35 Posted June 6, 2013 Author Posted June 6, 2013 Last night was terrible for me. The kids saw me crying. I made up a story that I needed to go take care of my mom. It kills me seeing her because she acts like it is nothing. How do you just toss away 2 years. I've read and read on here and it seems easy to help you prepare but once the pain kicks in, it takes over. I told her I felt she was dishonest to me all along.
eucalyptus Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 Sorry to hear about your misery, man. The likely reason that she can be so stoic about the break up is that she's probably been thinking about it for awhile. More than likely her dissatisfaction with the relationship is something that is really stemming from her own insecurity. Many people who enter relationships attempt to gain something from their mate that they themselves are lacking. The problem is that they often eventually discover that having access to their mate's admired qualities doesn't make their previous feelings of inadequacy vanish. It is my opinion that they then subconsciously start to blame the relationship for their angst instead of looking inward. It's kind of like the saying "You need to be able to be single in order to be able to be married." I am not saying that one needs to be totally OK with who they are in order to be in a life-long, successful relationship, but rather that some people are better than others at realizing that no one can make you truly happy but yourself. Significant others are supposed to compliment instead of define us. I say do what you can to stay NC. There are plenty of women out there who are looking to have a man compliment their lives instead of relying on them for their own internal validation.
aloneinaz Posted June 7, 2013 Posted June 7, 2013 The problem is It is my opinion that they then subconsciously start to blame the relationship for their angst instead of looking inward. It's kind of like the saying "You need to be able to be single in order to be able to be married." I am not saying that one needs to be totally OK with who they are in order to be in a life-long, successful relationship, but rather that some people are better than others at realizing that no one can make you truly happy but yourself. . Absolutely on point. It's NEVER there fault for their un-happiness, its someone elses.
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