Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I will. Look, this isn't the only thing that makes me undateable. I hardly see why this is such a big deal. Yeah I live at home, I know guys who live at home and do fine. I'm also quite socially awkward around females, and I've never kissed a girl in my life. Those are much much bigger issues than the fact that I live with my parents. One problem at a time.... Exactly. So, start with the biggest and most obvious hurdle you have: your living situation. Even if you weren't socially awkward and were a sex god, you'd have difficulty dating given your living situation. Ease that, ease your troubles.
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Men come to women. Women don't come to men. Women don't have a clue how much time it takes for a man to date them and how many rejections it took to find one who would say yes. That rejection process takes a lot of time. Are you saying it takes women less time than men to find someone to date? Hahaha
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Exactly. So, start with the biggest and most obvious hurdle you have: your living situation. Even if you weren't socially awkward and were a sex god, you'd have difficulty dating given your living situation. Ease that, ease your troubles. Well, I have to get a paying job first. And, I have no idea how to get my resume not thrown into the trash. So there's that. And no, I'm not joining the military. There was some wise a** who said that to me not all that long ago... 1
Els Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I will. Look, this isn't the only thing that makes me undateable. I hardly see why this is such a big deal. Yeah I live at home, I know guys who live at home and do fine. I'm also quite socially awkward around females, and I've never kissed a girl in my life. Those are much much bigger issues than the fact that I live with my parents. One problem at a time.... Well, both problems are an 'ongoing' thing, as in you can't just focus on one and then the other. They have a lot of synergy with each other, and neither can be solved in a few days of focused work. Yes, both of the issues are hurting your chances. Living at home is generally a big deal at your age, especially if you are doing so because you cannot afford a place of your own (as opposed to being caretaker for an ill parent, etc). Living with roommates generally sits better because it means you are independent, even if it denotes lesser privacy than having an apartment all to yourself. When people suggest ways for you to try and move out, I doubt any of us are saying that you should stop working on your social abilities. Going from '25 hours a week' to 'zero time to date' is quite a stretch, don't you think? Nobody is expecting you to be perfect - ie loaded with cash while always being available at the snap of a finger when a woman wants him. I think most adult women understand that many jobs require a little sacrifice, so if you need to work late on Friday night, it's okay as long as you do your best to spend the time you do have off with her. 1
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Where I live the people who earn $16-17K live in the ghetto and are forced to take the bus. And......? My BFF lives in a nice part of SF where rent on a studio is $4K, and she takes the bus. What other excuses do you have to offer?
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Well, I have to get a paying job first. And, I have no idea how to get my resume not thrown into the trash. So there's that. Retail jobs don't require resumes. They involve hitting the pavement, and filling out applications.
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Well, both problems are an 'ongoing' thing, as in you can't just focus on one and then the other. They have a lot of synergy with each other, and neither can be solved in a few days of focused work. Yes, both of the issues are hurting your chances. Living at home is generally a big deal at your age, especially if you are doing so because you cannot afford a place of your own (as opposed to being caretaker for an ill parent, etc). Living with roommates generally sits better because it means you are independent, even if it denotes lesser privacy than having an apartment all to yourself. When people suggest ways for you to try and move out, I doubt any of us are saying that you should stop working on your social abilities. Going from '25 hours a week' to 'zero time to date' is quite a stretch, don't you think? Nobody is expecting you to be perfect - ie loaded with cash while always being available at the snap of a finger when a woman wants him. I think most adult women understand that many jobs require a little sacrifice, so if you need to work late on Friday night, it's okay as long as you do your best to spend the time you do have off with her. Yeah I used to work weekends all the time at my sales job. That's not really what I was thinking of. I was thinking of like working 9-4 at one job and then 5 or 6-10 at the other. Every day. Or 5-6 days or something like that. That would make it hard to have any kind of social life. In contrast to people who work 8-5 or 9-6 every day. But anyway, I'm not saying that I shouldn't move out. I'm saying that I have no idea how to muster up the resources to do so without resorting to the scenario I laid out above. Ideally, I'd find a nice 40 hour a week job. But so far that's not happening. 1
USMCHokie Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I'm working almost as much as you are, Star Gazer (I work 60 hours a week, plus random on-call times). Reading this prompted me to do the calculation just out of curiosity...I work anywhere between 84 and 96 hours a week. Dafuq.
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Retail jobs don't require resumes. They involve hitting the pavement, and filling out applications. Really? When I went to target a few months ago they told me they don't accept in person applications. The grocery store across the street said the same thing. I didn't go to the mall or anything (perhaps I should) but I figured most places didn't bother with in person applications anymore. I guess I was wrong in that... 2
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Yes, this. I'm working almost as much as you are, Star Gazer (I work 60 hours a week, plus random on-call times). I can tell you, it's much more difficult to date as the pursuer than the pursuee. The issue is about not having "time" to date. So, 49 is saying he either doesn't work and doesn't date (because he's not financially able to even take a girl out, nevermind attract one because he's sharing a room at his parents' house), or works so much that he's not able to date... and that either way, he's screwed, woah is him. I call B.S. on the latter.
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 The issue is about not having "time" to date. So, 49 is saying he either doesn't work and doesn't date (because he's not financially able to even take a girl out, nevermind attract one because he's sharing a room at his parents' house), or works so much that he's not able to date... and that either way, he's screwed, woah is him. I call B.S. on the latter. Well, I was thinking something like I would work 9-4 at job #1 and 5-10 and job #2. That makes living on my own (with a roommate or two) doable. But, I'm pretty sure I would not have time to date. I could be wrong on that though, I'm not sure. And I do work now, it's just for zero dollars until the company turns a profit. 1
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 She earns $16-17K and has an apartment that is $4K/mo? Huh? No. You're mixing posts. I am not my BFF. I earned $16-17K a year while in college full time. My BFF currently lives in an area where rent for a studio is around $4K. My point was, my BFF lives in an area where rents are sky high, and so how she manages is by taking the dang bus.
USMCHokie Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I didn't know LS was paying you to post. ::golf clap:: 2
thefooloftheyear Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Well, I have to get a paying job first. And, I have no idea how to get my resume not thrown into the trash. So there's that. And no, I'm not joining the military. There was some wise a** who said that to me not all that long ago... I am assuming you live in the States? You seem like the perfect candidate for the oil rig work out in the Dakota's...Or maybe fracking gas for the utilities,,A friend of mine's kid went out there and is making 150K/yr. 23 year old kid. The work is a bit tough, and its really cold in the winter, but hes doing it and actually likes it. He spends very little of his own money and is bacnking a bundle...He isnt gong to do it long term, but figures he could save a half a mil in some time and go back home and start a business of his own..I think its great.. He also told me a lot of women are flocking around there hawking the guys. He is getting laid regularly so his father says... Seriously....Id do it if I was in my 20's....No question.. TFY 3
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Well, I was thinking something like I would work 9-4 at job #1 and 5-10 and job #2. That makes living on my own (with a roommate or two) doable. But, I'm pretty sure I would not have time to date. I could be wrong on that though, I'm not sure. And I do work now, it's just for zero dollars until the company turns a profit. I already explained to you how I managed to do it with just ONE paying part-time job. I didn't work two jobs, but I also went to school full time. Full time school, part time job, and I managed to live outside my parents' house AND have a boyfriend. Excuses, excuses. I've shown you the way, but as they say, you can lead a horse to water...
Author Eggplant Posted May 21, 2013 Author Posted May 21, 2013 between 84 and 96 hours a week. Dafuq. Work ethic is impressive. Now you're making me feel guilty... going to stop slacking off on LS.
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I am assuming you live in the States? You seem like the perfect candidate for the oil rig work out in the Dakota's...Or maybe fracking gas for the utilities,,A friend of mine's kid went out there and is making 150K/yr. 23 year old kid. The work is a bit tough, and its really cold in the winter, but hes doing it and actually likes it. He spends very little of his own money and is bacnking a bundle...He isnt gong to do it long term, but figures he could save a half a mil in some time and go back home and start a business of his own..I think its great.. He also told me a lot of women are flocking around there hawking the guys. He is getting laid regularly so his father says... Seriously....Id do it if I was in my 20's....No question.. TFY What kind of experience do you need? If they'll hire literally anyone, I'm game.
USMCHokie Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 Work ethic is impressive. Now you're making me feel guilty... going to stop slacking off on LS. I wouldn't go that far...I'm just here to be here.
fortyninethousand322 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 I already explained to you how I managed to do it with just ONE paying part-time job. I didn't work two jobs, but I also went to school full time. Full time school, part time job, and I managed to live outside my parents' house AND have a boyfriend. Excuses, excuses. I've shown you the way, but as they say, you can lead a horse to water... You're saying you did it, but what was a typical day like? Because I can't imagine how any woman would go out with a guy at like 10 pm (unless they were already dating). I can't imagine having any time to meet potential dates at that. Unless we're putting dating coworkers in bounds...
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 and where I live people use the bus to manage living in the ghetto. Again, and....? It's about priorities and choices. Live at home, share a room with your bro, remain dateless and celibate and complaining... ...or be a cool dude confident to live on your own, and able to draw the ladies back to your ghetto lair?
Author Eggplant Posted May 21, 2013 Author Posted May 21, 2013 You're saying you did it, but what was a typical day like? Because I can't imagine how any woman would go out with a guy at like 10 pm (unless they were already dating). I can't imagine having any time to meet potential dates at that. Unless we're putting dating coworkers in bounds... He'd pick me up at 11 pm and we'd go dancing.
thefooloftheyear Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 What kind of experience do you need? If they'll hire literally anyone, I'm game. I honestly dont know..I dont think too much..From what I hear they just need able bodies out there... I would seriously look into it...There are all sorts of resources on the net for this...From what I understand, he got a contact off the net and was working within a month..I dont know the details.. Go to it! TFY 3
Star Gazer Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 You're saying you did it, but what was a typical day like? Because I can't imagine how any woman would go out with a guy at like 10 pm (unless they were already dating). I can't imagine having any time to meet potential dates at that. Unless we're putting dating coworkers in bounds... School: I went from about 9-4, M-F. Work: I, like most service staff in the restaurant/bar industry (both FOH and BOH), worked Friday and Saturday nights. I also worked two other nights during the week. That left 3 nights free for dates, which was not unlike my current dating schedule, which allows me only 3-4 nights a week to date given other commitments I have at night.
BluEyeL Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 This. Since I discovered LS, I've been 250% less productive. Neah, I had facebook before, and other forums before that, for 11 years straight. Still doing OK with the job, you don't need to work harder, you need to work smarter Actually, I just got my yearly evaluation, the committee congratulated me for being lazy. They said something like "the committee is happy that you make decisions based on career impact and work load balance":laugh:
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