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Posted
Living at home as a grown man will definitely cramp your style, but I didn't know you also shared a room... :eek: Yeah, that's going to be a big problem.

 

Is there a reason why you don't live independently? Or at least, in your own room?

 

:laugh:

 

Yeah, it's a small room too (9x10). If I get a decent job I could move out. Unfortunately my job search hasn't been going so stellar. Particularly since I have nothing going for me aside from a college degree and retail experience.

 

Sales associates don't get paid enough to live on their own...

Posted
Well, I'm guessing that the poster you quoted actually got those 'girls' when he was in his teens (given that it usually takes several years to go from 'no direction' to $100k/year, so if he's telling the truth, this is the only timeline that makes sense). To teenage girls, I think looks, charm, and 'fun' matters the most, hence them ignoring the fact that he lived in mom's basement. But in your case, in your age range, I do agree that having a paying job and your own place would help. Is there any reason you have not been able to get one for so long? Or are you a full-time student/volunteer for a cause/etc?

 

I don't know. I quit my part time job as a sales associate 2 years ago because I was tired of it (was there for 9 years and had no future with the company). Ever since I have just not been able to get anywhere with any of my job applications. Despite some networking and getting some interviews from time to time.

 

I probably should have studied something a little more lucrative when I was school. But I was young and dumb and wasted that opportunity.

 

Now I just send job applications to jobs that I seem qualified for. With no luck obviously.

Posted
I don't know. I quit my part time job as a sales associate 2 years ago because I was tired of it (was there for 9 years and had no future with the company). Ever since I have just not been able to get anywhere with any of my job applications. Despite some networking and getting some interviews from time to time.

 

I probably should have studied something a little more lucrative when I was school. But I was young and dumb and wasted that opportunity.

 

Now I just send job applications to jobs that I seem qualified for. With no luck obviously.

I feel your pain on that front, 49.

 

Hopefully some positive news for both of us soon :).

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Posted

Hmmm. Can you not get a place of your own on a minimum-wage unrelated job? I know some folks in your position - got themselves into a very saturated field with few job prospects. Many of them branched out into different fields, starting out at the very bottom.

Posted
Sales associates don't get paid enough to live on their own...

 

With roommates, they do.

 

Everyone with a job can afford to have their own room. Don't try to sell me otherwise. I'm on to you. ;)

Posted
Hmmm. Can you not get a place of your own on a minimum-wage unrelated job? I know some folks in your position - got themselves into a very saturated field with few job prospects. Many of them branched out into different fields, starting out at the very bottom.

 

Where I live? Not a chance.

 

Maybe if I worked 2-3 jobs. But, I'm not sure I'd want to do that.

Posted
Where I live? Not a chance.

 

Maybe if I worked 2-3 jobs. But, I'm not sure I'd want to do that.

 

Even if it was full-time?

 

Well, I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you regardless. Hope you get that big break someday. :)

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Posted
With roommates, they do.

 

Everyone with a job can afford to have their own room. Don't try to sell me otherwise. I'm on to you. ;)

 

Where I live? No way. I've looked. Two bedroom apartment is $1200 minimum.

 

If you work a part time job at 10 dollars an hour, 25 hours a week you're making $250 a week, before taxes. Factor in utilities, car insurance, cell phone bill (for a regular phone, I don't have a smart phone with internet plans and all of that), food, there's no way.

 

I suppose I could work 2 part time jobs. Problem is, I've had a hard enough time finding just one part time job how am I going to find two?

Posted
Even if it was full-time?

 

Well, I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you regardless. Hope you get that big break someday. :)

 

Well, I've got a promising situation lined up for a bank teller position, as well as another full time job which I was contacted for.

 

So, hopefully one of those work out. In the meantime I have to keep grinding it out.

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Posted
Where I live? No way. I've looked. Two bedroom apartment is $1200 minimum.

 

I managed to do just that (rent was higher, actually), while balancing a 15 units a semester. You're making excuses.

Posted

Until I could afford my own apartment, I always had roommates. Sometimes we converted the apartment living room into another bedroom so we could bring someone else in to split the rent. I would have done anything back then NOT to live at home.

 

Start looking for all those Yahoo Finance articles that pop up listing jobs that pay well, many most would never consider or have never heard of.

Posted
Where I live? No way. I've looked. Two bedroom apartment is $1200 minimum.

 

If you work a part time job at 10 dollars an hour, 25 hours a week you're making $250 a week, before taxes. Factor in utilities, car insurance, cell phone bill (for a regular phone, I don't have a smart phone with internet plans and all of that), food, there's no way.

 

I suppose I could work 2 part time jobs. Problem is, I've had a hard enough time finding just one part time job how am I going to find two?

 

Well, yeaahh, 25 hours/week is gonna be pretty difficult to subsist on unless you're at consultant/professor level, of course.

 

Regarding 2-bedroom apartments, though - I'm not sure if these are available where you live, but where I live, the bigger houses in the suburbs are much, much cheaper. Not only is the land value cheaper in general due to being in the suburbs, but when there are more occupants in a house, the rent per room goes down. So if you were to go for, say, a 4-bedroom house with 3 other roommates, you would likely pay less than if you were in a 2-bedroom apartment. You will need to commute to the city for your job, but sometimes it's worth it.

 

It was from my late teens to early 20s (specifically 18-23). I'm now 26.

 

There are very few careers where you could go from 0 to 100 in 3 years. I'm in one of them.

 

That's not to say that I particularly like it though....

 

Fair enough. Still stands, though, that priorities change as people grow older - and you too are going to be assessed by your age. 18 year old guy living at home with no direction is usually acceptable to fellow 18 yo girls. 23 is rather iffy, but still possible. Mid twenties onwards will be much more difficult.

Posted
I managed to do just that (rent was higher, actually), while balancing a 15 units a semester. You're making excuses.

 

I guess you're a better person than I am. But the math doesn't add up. Unless, like I said you work 2 jobs.

 

By the way, I can't get a job at all. Seriously. I haven't exactly applied to McDonalds, but I've applied to minimum wage positions. Keep getting thrown in the trash I suppose.

Posted
Until I could afford my own apartment, I always had roommates. Sometimes we converted the apartment living room into another bedroom so we could bring someone else in to split the rent. I would have done anything back then NOT to live at home.

 

Same here. There are options. Choosing to live at home, and share a room with a sibling on top of that? Nooooo way.

  • Author
Posted
I have seen some studies over the years suggesting it is very important to women so much so they would pick a very obese man the kind who look pregnant all the time over a fit supermodel.

 

Many women are resources focused since the female fantasy is still a male as provider.

 

OK so am I just different? Although in all honesty, I don't want a male who models, :laugh:!

Posted
I guess you're a better person than I am.

 

It's not that I'm a better person; I just prioritized my independence over mooching off the fam' and being miserable and complaining about it as a result. You're complaining about your situation, but not really doing anything to change it.

 

It's about choices here, friend.

 

But the math doesn't add up. Unless, like I said you work 2 jobs.

 

Then work them, or get a full time job. 25 hours isn't full time. And 25 hours a week at $10 barely falls above the taxable income minimum; you don't even pay taxes on the gross majority of it.

Posted

The other thing, if I were to work say 60 hours a week just to have the privilege of moving out, I wouldn't have any free time to date anyway so I still wouldn't have any dating success. So, it's really 13 one way a baker's dozen the other...

  • Like 1
Posted
Choosing to live at home, and share a room with a sibling on top of that? Nooooo way.

 

Even as a child, I refused to share a room with a sibling. Can't imagine doing it as an adult.

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  • Author
Posted
Possibly but do you not want a man exhibiting any of the classic traits?

 

What are they?

Posted
It's not that I'm a better person; I just prioritized my independence over mooching off the fam' and being miserable and complaining about it as a result. You're complaining about your situation, but not really doing anything to change it.

 

It's about choices here, friend.

 

I'm not totally mooching. I still pay for my gas, cell phone, and car insurance. I still drive my half blind dad around (the only way he could get to work). The only thing I mooch is a rood and food.

 

And I'm not really complaining. I'm saying it probably hurts my dating chances. But it's far from the only thing.

 

Then work them, or get a full time job. 25 hours isn't full time. And 25 hours a week at $10 barely falls above the taxable income minimum; you don't even pay taxes on the gross majority of it.

 

I know it's not full time, that's the point. How do I find a full time job? How do I find any job? I haven't exactly been sitting on my hands the last two years...

  • Like 1
Posted
How much were you making and how many hours a week were you working?

 

I remember earning around $16-17K a year, waiting tables. I worked 4-5 times a week, sometimes more if a friend needed a shift covered. During non-school times (summer, winter), I picked up seasonal shifts in retail, A&F specifically.

 

I had a nice 2 bed/2 bath apartment I shared with a roommate, 1/2 utilities, a brand new car and payment, insurance, gas, groceries, and I went out drinking 2-3 nights a week. I made it work. If I'd had a more reasonable car, it would have actually been comfortable.

 

Oh, I also paid my state college tuition on that income.

 

The only thing I didn't pay for was my cell phone and books, which my mom covered.

  • Author
Posted
The other thing, if I were to work say 60 hours a week just to have the privilege of moving out, I wouldn't have any free time to date anyway so I still wouldn't have any dating success. So, it's really 13 one way a baker's dozen the other...

 

When I met my ex, he worked 90+ hours/week, two full-time jobs, and then still took me dancing and to the park, etc. But I think he was super-human.

Posted
The other thing, if I were to work say 60 hours a week just to have the privilege of moving out, I wouldn't have any free time to date anyway so I still wouldn't have any dating success. So, it's really 13 one way a baker's dozen the other...

 

I worked 65-70 hours a week while in private practice for 7 years, and had no trouble finding time to date.

 

Excuses, excuses. Keep makin' 'em!

  • Like 1
Posted
I worked 65-70 hours a week while in private practice for 7 years, and had no trouble finding time to date.

 

Excuses, excuses. Keep makin' 'em!

 

I will.

 

Look, this isn't the only thing that makes me undateable. I hardly see why this is such a big deal. Yeah I live at home, I know guys who live at home and do fine.

 

I'm also quite socially awkward around females, and I've never kissed a girl in my life. Those are much much bigger issues than the fact that I live with my parents.

 

One problem at a time....

  • Like 2
  • Author
Posted
That is the funny part. Women demand a man who lives on his own but if you earn little that either means roommates and no privacy or him working ridiculous hours and treading water so dates will consist of ramen on the stoop when he has the time. It could even be both at the same time. Both very often also come with very cramped accommodations.

 

My ex had roommates.

 

He was also a fabulous cook and could prepare very healthy meals -- no ramen.

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