gd1039 Posted September 30, 2004 Posted September 30, 2004 Ok strange question. Do you think that asking for a lot of advice can actually become a crutch for some? I am talking about simple advice like "how did this date go?" type things. Example...I had coffee with this girl from school today, I thought it went well and would like to see her again, but questions linger in my mind over whether she thought it was a date or if we are just friends. I am refraining from actually asking for opinions and advice because I sort of think it is bad to constantly need (and ask for) others opinions and not to be able to decide for yourself. So, what does everyone think? Is it a crutch to feel the need to ask for advice after meeting potential dates so that you can satisfy your understanding of the situation? More applied to me, should I be able to just go with the flow and not think so much, or is it normal to seek other opinons on mundane details like this?
Mr Spock Posted September 30, 2004 Posted September 30, 2004 Very good question, I am way too tired to think of something right now-I'll post on it tomorrow. I think it has to do with our tendancy to turn our crushes into obessions. Over analyzing every little thing. More later.
Author gd1039 Posted September 30, 2004 Author Posted September 30, 2004 And, the fastest self response to a thread started by ones self: This is quickly (in my mind) steering into an analysis of myself. Fast background on myself, I haven't had a girlfriend in a lengthy amount of time and an semi anxious to meet a great girl. But...I do stay very level headed and don't fall for every single girl I meet. I am not blinded in my search for love. Now, I do meet girls but I have been having terrible luck, so like Mr. Spock had said, I probably do over analyze every little thing. So having got that out in the air, I think a problem (and where the crutch comes in) is a lack of confidence. I have more than enough confidence to approach and talk to girls, but maybe I don't have confidence over the dating situation. I haven't really thought much about this "date" today, as I mentioened I think it went well, but like I said in the back of my head there is some doubt over how she viewed this "date". I would feel much more comfortable knowing exactly how it went, but I don't think I am going to lose sleep tonight thinking about it either.
Merin Posted September 30, 2004 Posted September 30, 2004 I don't think it's a "crutch" to ask for advice or seek opinion's of others.... I do agree with Spock, that sometimes people tend to over analyze and obsess over every detail of what was said and what could it mean.... With that said though... I don't think it's wierd or bad to seek outside opinions when you feel uncertain about what is going on or trying to sort through Bulls*** sometimes to find a more clear meaning.... AND LOL I've read enough post's to know that when ppl here think you've fallen into the catagory of obsessing, they will point it out to you... even that sometimes helps!
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