rainmayker Posted May 19, 2013 Posted May 19, 2013 Hi guys, this is an important post and I want you to keep it in your heart. I recently went through a very painful breakup where my ex-gf dumped me "out of the blue" (blindsided breakup) after having been together for 3 years. I learned quite a few things from this, especially since she was my first love. I want to share this information with you so that you will at least have the answers that I did not have when I was going through it. You may or may not get your ex back, but if you use the information that I give you here, your chances increase exponentially. Steps and Rules During the breakup, fight for it! Express your emotions and let everything out so that they know that you care about the relationship and that you will want to work it out. Best to end with high energy. Tell them that it's not over, that you're just taking a break.Immediately after breakup, disappear for at least a week. VERY IMPORTANT! This will "shock" them into loneliness and missing you. This works EVEN IF they have found a rebound. If they have found a rebound, it may be better to wait for two weeks instead.1 to 2 weeks after breakup, message him/her to talk about the relationship and accept that it's over. Tell them that you agree that it's best if you are just friends, and leave on a good note.Make yourself available on Skype or FB Chat for a few days... he/she will contact you. When he/she does, this is your CHANCE to take back power. They will call "just to talk" or because they are lonely. When you talk, get on the phone or voice chat. Sound like you are perfectly fine. Then, end the call. Don't let them be the one to end the call, so make sure that you are the one who does it! They will start to wonder if leaving you was a bad thing.Afterward, go on Limited Contact (LC). Never be the one to initiate contact. When they contact you, respond relatively quickly about 1-3 times. Then, stop responding for that particular session (without saying goodbye - just abruptly stop messaging). Do this every time they contact you. This has worked for me VERY well, as it keeps them on their toes. Be very vague about what you're doing, where you're going, and who you're with. If you really want them to think about you, try to be places where they have always been nervous about you being at (such as concerts). When they ask you where you are, just tell them! They will start to boil with jealousy, and you take center stage in their mind again.*Mind Game* Okay, so I hate playing mind games, but this is the ONE time that I actually think that you should do something like this... (if you aren't already feeling it). When I felt that my ex was getting into me again, I was already on my way out, as I had started to see someone new. So, when she started contacting me a lot more, I told her that maybe we should stop contacting each other as often with a short break. I felt that she was starting to suffocate me again, so I put the stop right there, and it drove her NUTS! If you aren't seeing anyone, I urge you to *pretend* that you are (without making up lies) and that you are *starting* to lose interest in your ex. The happier you seem without her, the more she will want you back.Seal the Deal. This is where you can finally get her/him back. A few things may happen at this point, but the important thing is that your ex wants you back (or doesn't want you back). If she wants you back, then she will start paying more attention to you. In my case, she started "Liking" my FB posts more often. Then, she started stalking me on Skype... (she would be invisible until I signed online, then she would sign on, and when I'd go invisible, she'd magically sign offline, too). At this point, you can either talk to her first, or respond when she talks to you. Start off by doing some light-hearted conversation (with plenty of jokes), then start talking about the "good old days" when you were together. Let her remember the good times and it's even better if she brings them up on her own. Then, after maybe 15mins of talking, start talking about how "hey, I wonder how it would be if we got back together?" She will either agree or disagree. It's up to you now whether or not you want to have the relationship. But whatever happens, make sure to be the better person and start things fresh or to leave on a good note. That, my friends, is how you get your ex back, all from personal experience. Please enjoy, and if you found this helpful, please leave a comment below - preferably with your own story or experience.
crederer Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 I've done pretty much all of these things up until point 6. About a week ago her sister posted a picture of herself getting ready for her prom that night on FB and I said "they grow up so fast! Have fun and behave yourself! God, I sound like my mother". My ex's mom and her two aunts, who I was very close to, all "liked" the status. I know, this sounds all very lame.... But anyways, the next day my ex contacted me for the first time in about 2 weeks saying she hopes to "hang out and be friends". I'm assuming it was because I made that FB post on her sisters profile and she saw it. I dunno about the head games part, but the rest of it seemingly is working (unless she actually just wants to be friends, then that'll be the end of that). Playing head games seems like it could back fire. Maybe I'll play that card if I feel she is truly friendzoning me.
Treasa Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 As someone who was always able to get her exes back, here are my tips: 1. Get a life. 2. Get over it and find someone else. 5
OwlSoul Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 Best to end with high energy. Tell them that it's not over, that you're just taking a break. [+/-] Well, I kind of disagree. I expressed that I want the relationship before the break-up, but once the final words are said, anything else will only hurt imho. Well yeah, I was angry and emotional and told him that I won't talk to him anymore and etc. [*]Immediately after breakup, disappear for at least a week. VERY IMPORTANT! This will "shock" them into loneliness and missing you. [+] Well, I really went NC after the break-up for a week. But I was not doing it in the purpose of making him lonely or anything. It was the time I needed for myself before I could talk to him. He told to my best friend that he hopes him and me will be able to talk in the future. So yeah, I initiated the contact. I asked him few questions about the relationship and the reason why the break-up happened. [*]1 to 2 weeks after breakup, message him/her to talk about the relationship and accept that it's over. [+] did this one. [*]Make yourself available on Skype or FB Chat for a few days... he/she will contact you. [+] Well, we were contacting over skype. But meh, I was not intentionally 'not initiating the contact first', 'ending the call first' and etc. [*]Afterward, go on Limited Contact (LC). Never be the one to initiate contact. [-] it is irrelevant who starts the contact, as fat as it is not personal. When I felt that my ex was getting into me again, I was already on my way out, as I had started to see someone new. [-] I am totally against the idea of seeing someone else if you want to get back. Same rule applies to the ex. If he'd date with someone else, there is no way towards the reconcilation.
Lostint Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 Everyone's different. What worked for one person isn't guaranteed to work for another. 1
ihateher83 Posted May 21, 2013 Posted May 21, 2013 not for nothing .. it's alittle to late for me ... but my ex blocked me from her life .... blocked me on fb ... told me "you need to stop" when texting her
orionboxing Posted June 16, 2013 Posted June 16, 2013 It's true that there is not a once size fits all plan. I have pulled three exes back in my entire life. Here's how. Girl 1 - She started behaving poorly and she started developing feelings for a mutual friend. I said "fine, go after him then". I turned around and went on a few dates with a girl that she knew fairly well and it wrecked her. 6 months later she sends a friend of hers to talk to me about getting back together and she wants to talk. I decide to meet with her, tells me she loves me, and tell her "no". A week or two later she approaches me again, and I give her another shot. It did not end well. Girl 2 - College romance. Dated for 4 months, had to separate because we both had to go home for the summer and lived so far apart. She dumped me over the phone and I just didn't seem to care. 5 months later she calls me when we all arrive back on campus and I ignore her. 7 months later I randomly see her out and about and we exchange numbers. We lasted month and I lost interest again. Girl 3 - Dated 5 years. I dumped her because she was a compulsive liar and I lost the spark with her. We kept in low contact over the next several months just checking in on each other...because 5 years is long time and the feelings don't really go away over night. I then vanished. 13 months later I see her out and about and we argue in public. I go home with her that night. We didn’t last long after that. The biggest factor in reconciliation is time and indifference. Don't put your life on hold for anyone. I'm finding the more I silently pine away and reflect on my ex-wife the less likely we'll get back together. Even if you don't contact them, it's like some women and men secretly know that you are still into them and it makes them run away from you. You have to mentally separate and stop thinking about them in order to have another chance. You also need to completely disappear. If you are readily available, you just don’t seem to be valuable. It's a weird phenomenon but seems to work. Also if you want to the rebound relationship to last, both partners need to make significant changes in their lives that will benefit the new relationship. You cannot change your identity, but you can change how you handle situations and learn to respect each other more. Nothing changed, nothing gained. 2
PR08 Posted June 16, 2013 Posted June 16, 2013 Even if you don't contact them, it's like some women and men secretly know that you are still into them and it makes them run away from you. Oh, how I wish there was a way to scientifically prove this! It's ALWAYS the same! In my life, in friends' lives and in the lives of work colleagues and acquaintances. God only knows how it works, but somehow they know when you're past caring... and it's only then that they spring up!
orionboxing Posted June 16, 2013 Posted June 16, 2013 Oh, how I wish there was a way to scientifically prove this! It's ALWAYS the same! In my life, in friends' lives and in the lives of work colleagues and acquaintances. God only knows how it works, but somehow they know when you're past caring... and it's only then that they spring up! It's sad but true.
travelonic Posted June 17, 2013 Posted June 17, 2013 Oh, how I wish there was a way to scientifically prove this! It's ALWAYS the same! In my life, in friends' lives and in the lives of work colleagues and acquaintances. God only knows how it works, but somehow they know when you're past caring... and it's only then that they spring up! It's sad but true. I guess the hard part in seeing the truth in this, for some anyways, is an underlying fear that by not caring, etc they'll completely lose all feelings, memory, and maybe even become bitter towards that ex... I do, like PR08 wish there was a way to prove scientifically this - seems interesting the dynamic at work here, and how it seems to happen in this fashion.
orionboxing Posted June 17, 2013 Posted June 17, 2013 (edited) I guess the hard part in seeing the truth in this, for some anyways, is an underlying fear that by not caring, etc they'll completely lose all feelings, memory, and maybe even become bitter towards that ex... I do, like PR08 wish there was a way to prove scientifically this - seems interesting the dynamic at work here, and how it seems to happen in this fashion. Well the whole point of it is to rid yourself of them and not waste your life "WAITING" for them to come around. Another part of it is to go out and do things for yourself in order gain some personal value. Put it this way - when I got hurt and Girl 1 and I split (see post above), I disappeared for several months and did some things of value. Got a better job, got more muscular, better clothes, got new friends (social proof via Facebook - my profile was public so she could stalk me). Even though I was really just the same guy, I was perceived as new and exciting when she saw me again. Don't worry, I still got that knot in my stomach when I saw her again. If you sit around, listen to depressing music, and mope about them not being around...you are not working on your value as a person. I know it's hard when you are hurt, but you need to make the effort to make improvements on yourself and go into complete hiding. Don't worry - they never will forget you. EVER. But absence makes the heart grow fonder...and the emotions of seeing anyone from your past after a long lay off is always a powerful thing (even for the ex). What really screws an ex up is your utter aloofness, indifference, and change in appearance after they haven't seen you and while because you have made no attempts to reconcile with them again. They think that they still have this power over you (which is a huge ego thing for an ex) and when you don't beg for them any more, it confuses the ***** out of them. That's when you slowly re-engage with them, once they begin reaching out for you. This has been my method for ALL THREE of the girls I wanted to reconcile with. So the method is as follows. 1. Ask for them back into your life (but don't sob and beg). They will say "no". Say "OK" and leave. Don't beg or ask for them back more than once. You will be absolutely devastated when they reject you. This is normal...this is part of the journey. 2. Disappear for 6-10 months. Absolutely NO CONTACT of any kind. Drop off the face of the earth...almost like you died. Rebuild yourself, workout, get new hobbies, go on some dates even if you are all not that into them, buy new clothes. 3. Blow them off if you ever see them again. Don't act like you miss them. Wait for that text or facebook message (it almost always comes). If it doesn't come, odds are in the 6-10 months you've disappeared you might meet someone even better than your ex. But you need to make the effort to get out there...otherwise your value will just be the same when they dumped you and when they eventually see you again. Edited June 17, 2013 by orionboxing 3
PDunny Posted June 17, 2013 Posted June 17, 2013 Oh, how I wish there was a way to scientifically prove this! It's ALWAYS the same! In my life, in friends' lives and in the lives of work colleagues and acquaintances. God only knows how it works, but somehow they know when you're past caring... and it's only then that they spring up! Psychology is the scientific proof of this working. The last week my ex has been barely texting me, I knew what I needed to do. I arranged a wonderful date with another person, hinted to my ex about it and she started asking more about it. Wanting to know who with, what we were going to do and how I met her. The point of the date was not to make my ex jealous at all, I need to get out. The extravagance of the date was to make her jealous however. It will be the most amazing date ever. Sunrise to Sunset date fully planned with no holds barred and my ex knows it. I disagree with much of this in regard to amount of time needed, the ways to approach it and the way to handle yourself. Ultimately, you and your ex are not dating any longer. What was it that originally attracted her/him to you? What did s/he like about you? Did s/he like that you were mysterious? Than be mysterious! Are they the jealous type? Than make them jealous but tell them that nothing will happen beyond the date. No sex etc and stick to it. No Contact for getting back with your ex is a bit much IMO, yes this might make them miss you but it might also lead them to someone else. You stepping up and making yourself as attractive as you can and changing what THEY didn't like about you is what will bring them back. And if it doesn't, chances are your better off getting the next one. Essentially, get on your feet, get on the market but don't plow everything. Let them know you love them, that you won't sleep with random people but you have to play the field a bit. This will drive them crazy. Basic, easy steps to reconcile with an ex: Gain strength Talk to the ex, let them know you care and be nice Be a better person Make them jealous Make them want you Worst/best case, you will get someone else.
travelonic Posted June 19, 2013 Posted June 19, 2013 Well the whole point of it is to rid yourself of them and not waste your life "WAITING" for them to come around. Another part of it is to go out and do things for yourself in order gain some personal value. Put it this way - when I got hurt and Girl 1 and I split (see post above), I disappeared for several months and did some things of value. Got a better job, got more muscular, better clothes, got new friends (social proof via Facebook - my profile was public so she could stalk me). Even though I was really just the same guy, I was perceived as new and exciting when she saw me again. Don't worry, I still got that knot in my stomach when I saw her again. If you sit around, listen to depressing music, and mope about them not being around...you are not working on your value as a person. I know it's hard when you are hurt, but you need to make the effort to make improvements on yourself and go into complete hiding. Don't worry - they never will forget you. EVER. But absence makes the heart grow fonder...and the emotions of seeing anyone from your past after a long lay off is always a powerful thing (even for the ex). What really screws an ex up is your utter aloofness, indifference, and change in appearance after they haven't seen you and while because you have made no attempts to reconcile with them again. They think that they still have this power over you (which is a huge ego thing for an ex) and when you don't beg for them any more, it confuses the ***** out of them. That's when you slowly re-engage with them, once they begin reaching out for you. This has been my method for ALL THREE of the girls I wanted to reconcile with. So the method is as follows. 1. Ask for them back into your life (but don't sob and beg). They will say "no". Say "OK" and leave. Don't beg or ask for them back more than once. You will be absolutely devastated when they reject you. This is normal...this is part of the journey. 2. Disappear for 6-10 months. Absolutely NO CONTACT of any kind. Drop off the face of the earth...almost like you died. Rebuild yourself, workout, get new hobbies, go on some dates even if you are all not that into them, buy new clothes. 3. Blow them off if you ever see them again. Don't act like you miss them. Wait for that text or facebook message (it almost always comes). If it doesn't come, odds are in the 6-10 months you've disappeared you might meet someone even better than your ex. But you need to make the effort to get out there...otherwise your value will just be the same when they dumped you and when they eventually see you again. Sometimes I forget that it has been only just over 4 months since I went full NC in my case - the first 3 months on-off doing the wrong things. I am, as others here know, a FIRM believer that variables factor in to whether or not there is a chance of reconciliation, and whether or not further down the lines there will be any combination of outreach, contact, etc between exes... and it is a position that seems very logical to add as obviously a relationship where the dumpee was abusive is different than one where the dumper became obsessed over [the perception of] greener grass. By variables, of course, I mean the people involved in the relationship, the breakup [why, mutual or not, greener grass involved or not, etc], the quality of the relationship before the breakup amongst other variables. And I do think time away from the ex, on top of these variables being just right, help big time in improving the chances - though I think these variables are the biggest factors. In pondering this though, I remembered something specific to my ex, etc: Whenever we had any kkind of argument that would result in us not talking for a period of time - from minutes to an hour to overnight, etc... giving her space, that pattern, those patterns I was reminded of in this thread. Sometimes, given her - erm, OUR behavioral quarks [as we share a ton of them, as well as the nuanced expression of said quarks], something was done that couldn't exactly be helped due those quarks we shared which would piss her off. The reaction to her being ticked off, pushing me away was pleading much in the way people mistakenly do when there is a breakup. Then I backed off, gave her space - and whether within a certain # of minutes, to an hour or two [say an argument before she had to go to classes [as we are both college students]], or overnight [say we had one on Skype, and we didn't see each other until the next morning, I didn't say another word... and eventually she'd be apologetic as ****. The more missed she got, or whatnot, the longer before she cooled off or came to her senses. Another thing to note is that when it came to hurting others who loved her/she loved, she was VERY conscientious about it, and in the confines of ou arguments would make her feel bad as she "came to her senses." I wonder if, when it comes to becoming obsessed over someone and perceiving greener grass, and throwing away a relationship for that greener grass [even at that moment convincing herself of these contrived reasons to abandon the relationship and pursue the greener grass] would fit into all this somewhere - which is what happened - and if this post was not just some incoherent ramble with a point that got lost. 1
travelonic Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 (edited) 3. Blow them off if you ever see them again. Don't act like you miss them. Wait for that text or facebook message (it almost always comes). I'd add to be ware of the temptation to give in to breadcrumbs - as they can be very tempting. Ugh, last night my ex commented on a Youtube video I uploaded back in January that is 1. incomplete, I just uploaded it as a test, and 2. we worked on together on/off for months before the breakup. So tempted to read it, but I gotta resist since then I - once I read it - will be so tempted to reply to it / probably try to.... damn, this is so ****in' hard sometimes. Edited June 20, 2013 by travelonic
p3psi Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 (edited) Oh, how I wish there was a way to scientifically prove this! It's ALWAYS the same! In my life, in friends' lives and in the lives of work colleagues and acquaintances. God only knows how it works, but somehow they know when you're past caring... and it's only then that they spring up! I don't know why it's not stickied already, but this is an excellent post for an answer on WHY that works. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/272674-getting-ex-back-laws-attraction Edited June 20, 2013 by p3psi 1
orionboxing Posted June 20, 2013 Posted June 20, 2013 I don't know why it's not stickied already, but this is an excellent post for an answer on WHY that works. http://www.loveshack.org/forums/breaking-up-reconciliation-coping/second-chances/272674-getting-ex-back-laws-attraction Nice link. Thanks. 1
travelonic Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 (edited) Very interesting post. I hope all the stuff in that thread, and this, applies even to those who started out doing the wrong things, then went and started doing the right things - and doing them for a few months now... as in, hopefully the tendency to do the wrong things [pleading, begging, etc] at the start doesn't Kill any of the stuff discussed here, and in that linked thread, if the person goes to doing the right things relatively soon after, and keeps on that track from then on. Edited June 21, 2013 by travelonic 1
marqueemoon4 Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 OP you seem like a really manipulative, insensitive person. Who in their right mind would want to be in a r/l with someone who plays with people's emotions like that? Check yourself.
orionboxing Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 OP you seem like a really manipulative, insensitive person. Who in their right mind would want to be in a r/l with someone who plays with people's emotions like that? Check yourself. Desperate times call for drastic measures. Plus, going after something you want and love takes a lot of character and guts to do. If we want to be with our exes, we should take the most effective steps to getting them back. Why should we go down a path of crying, texting them constantly, and doing all sorts of stupid things that would further push them away when there a more proven methods to attract them? Whatever the case, no stone should be left unturned, and you should never live thinking "what if?" If they reject you...so what. At least you had the strength to try.
na49 Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 So happy I didn't need to jump through any hoops to have my ex come back. She came back because she wanted to, and 2+ months later we're still together.
travelonic Posted June 21, 2013 Posted June 21, 2013 I gotta wonder - having read the posts here, and in the thread linked to [this one, http://www.loveshack.org/forums/brea...aws-attraction] - if breadcrumbs being thrown your way - and the TYPES of breadcrumbs more specifically - hold any weight as a measure of how you are doing in holding your own, not giving in, etc / the effect on the ex of not giving in to replying to them. I mean, there ARE pitfalls in doing that, but it seems logical to assume that the distinct possibility exists no matter how rare that, for example, the more you resist the stronger they become, and as a result the more that ex has you on their mind [if the ex happens to perseverate on things a lot especially].
p3psi Posted June 26, 2013 Posted June 26, 2013 Very interesting post. I hope all the stuff in that thread, and this, applies even to those who started out doing the wrong things, then went and started doing the right things - and doing them for a few months now... as in, hopefully the tendency to do the wrong things [pleading, begging, etc] at the start doesn't Kill any of the stuff discussed here, and in that linked thread, if the person goes to doing the right things relatively soon after, and keeps on that track from then on. I obviously can't speak to your situation, but I did read something you may find interesting. When you're talking about the law of attraction, you're taking the perspective that everything in our universe is rooted in vibrations: thoughts, matter (atoms do have electrons spinning rapidly around a nucleus, don't they?), etc. the vibrations are the common thread, and the vibrations generated by your thoughts, feelings, and consciousness are what allow you to interact with the universe. The beauty of a vibrational perspective of the universe is that, just like a new key struck on a piano will be louder than an old key that's currently fading, new thoughts will be louder than old thoughts and actions. Actions have consequences, but that doesn't mean you can't start anew at any time.
LinkWorshiper Posted June 28, 2013 Posted June 28, 2013 I hope it's not a big deal that I kind of followed these steps but not in exactly the same order and not exactly the same way. I really keep worrying I messed up all my chances of things ever working out between us. After our out-of-the-blue breakup, my ex didn't talk to me for days, despite me trying to get him to, as I thought he was just having a knee-jerk reaction during a stupid, drunk fight that got out of hand. When he finally did, he was a jerk, and I had a breakdown and ended up in the hospital. I am told he was very worried and emotional about the situation, though his friends kept him from contacting me while I was there, even though all I wanted was to be able to speak to him about what was going on. I left him alone when I was discharged for a few weeks, mostly because my roommate told me to, and I didn't fully understand why. I worry that I messed up by eventually falling back in with him after running into him on the street a few months later and having a casual conversation he admitted he had been afraid to initiate with me. Because after that talk, we started spending time together for the next two months, and long story short, I was really under the impression that we were rebuilding things from the ground up, working on the things we needed improvement on (i.e. communication etc.), and I really thought it was going in a good direction, especially when it got a point where he was flirting with me again, like seriously. He was even asking me what he had to do to prove himself to me again and asked for a serious answer (and I told him I needed to see he could handle tough stuff, talk about things and be trustworthy). Then it turned on a dime and he got quiet and I made him tell me what was going on because it was obvious it wasn't just work, and he said the reason he dialed it back was because he met someone, though he was just feeling her out and he wasn't sure if he really wanted to pursue her and maybe the relationship would be hard and he didn't want it. After thinking about it for a few days, I called him and told him if he was serious about it, then we shouldn't see each other for a little bit and explained why, specifically that I couldn't keep putting myself into these emotionally vulnerable positions with him and hang around experiencing the same relationship we always had except for without any sex. I made sure to tell him it wasn't because I didn't care or anything, but I needed at least two weeks, and he said to not put a time limit on it and take all the space I needed to feel comfortable, he'd take his, and when I felt okay, I could contact him any time. It's been about a week and a half and I really don't expect to hear from him for at least a month if it's even going to be any time in the relatively near future. But I freak out that I've ruined everything by not going right into NC, or that I didn't so abruptly tell him off when I established the NC, though I did tell him some pretty harsh words when he was initially telling me he was thinking of maybe pursuing this girl. (I told him he treats girls like hobbies.) Anyway, I've just been trying to live life as normally as possible and making sure that whatever I post on FB is just like... normal, normal, normal. I even asked his roommate to finally get the rest of my stuff back. I guess I just worry he doesn't even care and me establishing NC was his cue to Kanye shrug and get off the hook.
TaraMaiden Posted August 9, 2013 Posted August 9, 2013 OP, your first poisat is basically manipulation because you have a self-serving agenda. mainly, it's to engineer what YOU want and it plays mind-games. I cry foul on that. If a dumper dumps you, something about the situation isn't floating their boat. And it's something about you. Justified or not, if YOU don't see that as the issue, and decide you want to change it, for good - for YOURSELF - then such moves are merely cosmetic and ultimately pointless. A dumpee may get the girl back, but as you have been shown, it's not a permanent return, every time, is it? (logically, it should be the ONLY time: If a guy works to get the girl back, it should be for good. Subsequent efforts with other girls wouldn't figure, if he got the original girl back with the intention of making it work for good.... So what's the point then, of prolonging the agony?) I note this is a thread with a single contribution from the OP. The First Post. I love it how they "light blue touch-paper then stand well back".... Wonder how his tactics worked for him? And more's the point - how many times??
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