CyphEr39 Posted September 29, 2004 Posted September 29, 2004 Lets just say my name is Lee, the girl I'm "seeing" is Megan. Ok, now let us begin... We work together, kinda. We're in sales so we dont see each other at work due to the fact that our work revolves around outside sales in seperate territories. We started "hanging out" about 7 months ago. At first it was strictly physical (for about a month) then we started seeing more and more of each other. She's always told me that we are not in a relationship, but there is potential for one in the future... And so it goes... We spend so much time together, and it's great. We have alot of great discussions and get along very well on many levels.. Sounds like the making of a perfect relationship doesn't it! Nope, well apparently not. Let me explain further, we spend almost every day together, we've been on two trips together (although not geographically to far from home). She'll act like she really likes me, then all of a sudden, go kinda cold on me.. I always chalked it up to, "getting a little freaked out". Last weekend she went to her girlfriends house who lives slightly outside the city for a day or so. I guess she wanted some "girl" time but wasnt really all that clear about it to me. I decided to give her a call on her cell.. no answer.. So, I gave her a call about 2 hours later or so..No answer.. So I left a message... No reply... To make a long story short----er she didn't call me back that night. Finally the next day, she still hasn't called yet, I give her friends house a call, and apparently shes already left for home.. I call her at home in a while and leave a message on her home phone, to which, she calls back, acting kinda bothered with me. I go over there and we talk.. She tells me that we are not in a relationship and I shouldn't have bothered her when I knew she was having girl time with her friend.. I agree, and the show goes on... She tells me that we spend way to much time together, and it needs to tone itself down. I say fine but I'm still (in my head) senseing some sort of stand-off-ish attitude on her part.. Anyways, we have sex twice then I go home later on that evening... That was Sunday.. Monday, we go to our monthly sales meeting, and then she drops me off at home... We dont talk until today (tuesday) in the morning. Our conversation was really about nothing.. But I did want to make sure we still had plans for this evening as I was supposed to pick her up from her college course which she takes on tuesdays, the course ends at 8:30 p.m. . So I tell her on the phone, "Ok, call me if you DONT want me to meet you after you get out of school". She says, "ok, sounds good". I go through my daily routine and receive no phone call, so I assume that I'm supposed to meet her when she gets out. Well, I see her get out of the elevator, I'm outside, and walk straight for the side door and start walking up the street. After a short little jont I catch up to her, "Hi, I came to pick you up??" (I though she was expecting me) She looked a little starteled or something and tells me, "Well I'm just going to go home". I tell her I'll give her a ride, she accepts. In the car she doesn't really make any eye contact with me, and is acting very distant.. So I ask her, "Are you trying to avoid me or something" ~I may have had a bit of a tone in my voice~ she goes quiet... Finally says, you dont need to talk to me like that. She further tells me that she wasnt expecting me and she feels sick and just wants to go home. I drop her off and she says, in a total blow off tone, dont think about this, just chill. Gives me a little hug and says she'll talk to me tomorrow... I'm a little bothered because all of these actions are totally out of character for her, so I give her a call, get her machine, and ask her to call me. ABout 45 min. later she calls me. I attempt to make small talk, and as soon as I do, I get the blow off tone, followed by the blow off, "I'll talk to you tomorrow OK!!!". I then tell her that I am a little bothered by this and I really get no response, other than, I'll talk to you tomorrow, I dont want to talk about this right now, etc, etc. One more thing... I checked her voice mail on her cell (I know thats terrible, but I got a weird gut instinct going on here) and there was a message saved on there from yesterday (Monday) that was from a guy that is in from out of town for the sales meeting we were at, that went a little like this, "Hey how you doing, it was really good seeing you again (At the sales meeting I suppose). This meeting will be over in a few hours then I should be coming back into town, so give me a call" . Now that IS weird because he doesn't have any real reason to call her and leave a message like that unless there's something going on... .... ....... ......... Maybe that has something to do with the silence and distant-ness coming from her??? What do you think about all this? Am I being blown off? ***Follow up*** She's now called me this morning and talked about nothing.. when I asked her why she called, she said just to say hi... Very non-chelant... Dont know what to make of this?? She let me go and told me she'd call me later...This is weird!!! HELP!!!!
SoleMate Posted September 29, 2004 Posted September 29, 2004 If I were you, I would not spend much effort pursuing someone who was that uninterested in me. Your unreciprocated attentions are starting to look unpleasantly smothering. From there, it's two short steps to stalking. You two started off just using each other for sex. You developed feelings and clearly want more, and I believe it's just as clear that she doesn't. I'm sorry for your pain. That's the potentially harsh reality of jumping into bed with a near stranger. I'm a little bothered because all of these [standoffish] actions are totally out of character for her... Well, they're very different from what she was doing when trying to get you into bed. I see no reason to believe that they are truly "out of character". And she likely was feeling ill the other day. And don't worry about the other sales guy. You really have no claim on this girl, so don't go acting like you do.
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