Hockeyguy19 Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Hey LS faithful, just a quick question, when does sleep start to return to normal? I'm lucky if I get more then 3 hours in a row before I wake up and can never fall back asleep. Last night it feels like I didn't sleep at all.
TaraMaiden Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 It will get back to normal when you do. How soon is that? How soon do you really want it to be?
Author Hockeyguy19 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 It will get back to normal when you do. How soon is that? How soon do you really want it to be? Yesterday lol
TaraMaiden Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Okay. So, as of yesterday, "Welcome to your new sleep pattern!"
TaraMaiden Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 It is - if you know how. Let me ask you - do you 'snowball'....?
Author Hockeyguy19 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 Okay. So, as of yesterday, "Welcome to your new sleep pattern!" It is - if you know how. Let me ask you - do you 'snowball'....? Unsure what you mean by snowball, can you explain?
TaraMaiden Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 I once read something on the internet, that struck a chord.... Basically it said that when you're in true distress, the distress lasts for 12 minutes or so. After that, it's self-inflicted. A stack of people came back with arguments against this fact: That drug addicts can take years to get over their pain, bereavement is permanent because someone is gone you can't replace them... They were missing the point. If a thought that provokes the pain comes into your head, that thought generates that pain for around 12 minutes at a time. Any prolongation of that pain, is something you are psychologically inflicting upon yourself, by perpetuating that pain. So the thing to do, is to not permit that pain to 'snowball.' This is the problem with situations like this: Those nursing a broken/healing heart, can't "just leave it there".... They begin the snowballing... that is, they have the grain of an embryonic thought, and instead of leaving it, they begin to roll it DOWN the hill, accumulating more 'snow' as they go, turning this fleeting little notion into a great big story complete with chapter, verse, footnotes and date references.... The trick is to not start rolling the snowball. Pick it up and throw it, and move on. It takes time to 'get over' a relationship of any kind. But in your healing process, learn to spot, to recognise, where the real 'pain' should stop, and where you begin with the self-inflicted 'pain'. Pain is valid. Emotions are valid. They deserve to be honoured. But if we self-inflict, we actually do those honourable feelings an injustice, because we coat them and embellish them with our own story, and blur the edges of their raw honesty. The self inflicted pain begins when you begin to labour the point. When you diversify from the original thought and take that line of thinking into a completely new and unrelated zone. you may THINK it's all related, but it's not. For example: (totally invented and just to demonstrate....) You suddenly remember that day the car ran out of petrol, and she jokingly accuses you of doing it on purpose, in order to get down to some naughty hanky-panky... it makes you smile, but you then remember where you were going, what your trip out was for, what she was wearing, other things she said.... Here it is again, with the original thought, and where the point starts getting laboured... (1) You suddenly remember that day the car ran out of petrol, and she jokingly accuses you of doing it on purpose, in order to get down to some naughty hanky-panky... it makes you smile, [highlight]snowballing starts here[/highlight] (2) but you then remember where you were going, what your trip out was for, what she was wearing, other things she said.... See what happened there? You began the snowballing, adding, embellishing, expanding - and feeding your own pain. Feel the feeling (1). Don't labour the point (2). 3
Ale khun Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 I hope you are feeling better today I had the same problem I had insomia for a very long time I was angry almost everyday cranky and sad I wasn't sleeping at all (you know with all those crazy scenarios in my head ) post break up . My doctor told me that the insomnia was the result of the anxiety and stress I had . He prescribed me vitamin b-12 lost of water , exercise and tons of laughs to help my central nervous system to get back in track after a few days I was feeling way better , I hope this works for you too best wishes . 1
Emilia Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Hey LS faithful, just a quick question, when does sleep start to return to normal? I'm lucky if I get more then 3 hours in a row before I wake up and can never fall back asleep. Last night it feels like I didn't sleep at all. It took me about 2 weeks when the same thing happened years ago. Improvement on wanting to throw up anyhow.
Sittinginmcds Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 I (don't) sleep right next to her for the past few nights. It lasts until you hate them more and love them less.
Author Hockeyguy19 Posted May 19, 2013 Author Posted May 19, 2013 Thanks everyone for the replies, I do agree with you Tara that snowballing does play a major role in my mental anguish, and after reading that I am attempting to change my cognitive thinking. I'm also going to try some vitamins along with my workouts and outdoor activities. Yes it sucks not sleeping beside her (or beside someone in general) but ive done it before her, and I can do it again. I can sit here and bash her and tell you guys how much I hate her, but that's not the answer. The answer is honoring this pain and releasing it. She's gone, end of story. Nothing else is needed to be said. It's now about me me me, as selfish as that sounds. I need to continue to slowly heal, as I hope the rest of you on LS are too. 1
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