mortensorchid Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 It's funny, now that I am experienced with OLD that I can now recognize an obvious crazy person now. I've been on POF for a week or so, and results are good if not great. I immediately delete the ones who have no picture without opening it. I used to say "I would like to see a picture please", and not one has responded to that. SO it's either spam or someone hiding something. I open the messages and respond as appropriate. Then they ask if I have another picture to show them. I say immediately "NO I don't" and I never hear from them again. Learned that the hard way a few years ago when I was on another website where I connected with this one guy and he asked for me to send another photo of myself to him via text message. He kept badgering me for it until I sent one of me of a headshot in the mirror. He texted back "thanks" and then that was that. When I went back on the website, his photo was missing all of a sudden. He called me three or four times since, I never returned the calls until one day I picked up the phone and he identified himself. He asked if he wanted to get together again like we were supposed to so many months ago, I said "NO thank you" and hung up. We'll see what we'll see. Made a positive connection with someone who doesn't seem like a psycho.
sillyanswer Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 I immediately delete the ones who have no picture without opening it. I think you can change your mail settings so that people without pictures cannot mail you. I open the messages and respond as appropriate. Then they ask if I have another picture to show them. I say immediately "NO I don't" and I never hear from them again. Well that is a bit of a conversation stopper! If you already have a representative handful of photos then, if you want to keep talking to them, you could try a softer response. Even as a guy, with a range of photos (head, full body etc) I sometimes get asked if I have more... so last time I was updating photos I kept one back on purpose so that, yes, I do have one extra to share for people who ask.
Author mortensorchid Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 Well it seems I spoke too soon on this. Made a comment on having made a connection with someone and he didn't seem like a psycho. Last night we texted for the first time for a bit. Just chatty stuff about weekend plans. Then I wake up this morning and I have a text from him "Personally I don't know who the f*** you are and I don't give a rat's ass". I assure all of you reading this I did not send anything offensive or rude to him. The last thing I sent to him was that I was going to a coffee shop last night. Yikes. Really dodged a bullet there didn't I? 2
BluEyeL Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Yikes indeed... I don't understand why, from all OLD sites, you choose POF? Why don't you try match.com? I know you need to pay, but the quality is significantly higher. Or at least OKC if you don't want to pay. I've been on OKC for three days two weeks ago, found 6 apparently normal people that I talked to, and I've been on dates with three of them. In turn, on POF for a week all you got is one psycho to text with? 1
Author mortensorchid Posted May 19, 2013 Author Posted May 19, 2013 My only thought on this text is/was that it was sent to me by mistake, but I told myself that unless I got an explination within 24 hours I was going to block him. And that explination never came, so I am blocking him on the website. Too bad.
Author mortensorchid Posted May 20, 2013 Author Posted May 20, 2013 Yikes indeed... I don't understand why, from all OLD sites, you choose POF? Why don't you try match.com? I know you need to pay, but the quality is significantly higher. Or at least OKC if you don't want to pay. I've been on OKC for three days two weeks ago, found 6 apparently normal people that I talked to, and I've been on dates with three of them. In turn, on POF for a week all you got is one psycho to text with? I've been on OKC, and that was just about useless for me. I think I met 3 people in the flesh, the last one was such a jerk he literally walked away from me - no handshake, hug, etc. - just said "Thanks for the stories" and left me. On OKC I would get into a chat with someone and then sign on the next day and their profile was gone. I have done POF before, but I know a guy who met his currant gf on POF and they seem well matched. So maybe it could happen.
ChessPieceFace Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 I was on another website where I connected with this one guy and he asked for me to send another photo of myself to him via text message. He kept badgering me for it until I sent one of me of a headshot in the mirror. He texted back "thanks" and then that was that. When I went back on the website, his photo was missing all of a sudden. He called me three or four times since, I never returned the calls until one day I picked up the phone and he identified himself. He asked if he wanted to get together again like we were supposed to so many months ago, I said "NO thank you" and hung up. Wow. Seriously sounds like he was planning criminal action (either rape or robbery.)
sillyanswer Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 I've been on OKC, and that was just about useless for me. I think the relative 'quality' of the two sites is both location-dependent and observer-dependent. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder etc. (and this is why we never really reach a consensus as to which site is 'better'.)
nerd Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 OKC worked much better for me than POF. But anecdotes... Match was the worst for me, despite having to pay for it. Orchid, from your description I would have assumed that your correspondent's cell was abducted for a second and a 'friend' sent the message. Then I wouldn't expect to get an apology very soon because who knows how long it would take to notice that Then again, I don't have friends who would be likely to do that sort of thing, so that might be another reason to block
Author mortensorchid Posted May 20, 2013 Author Posted May 20, 2013 OKC worked much better for me than POF. But anecdotes... Match was the worst for me, despite having to pay for it. Orchid, from your description I would have assumed that your correspondent's cell was abducted for a second and a 'friend' sent the message. Then I wouldn't expect to get an apology very soon because who knows how long it would take to notice that Then again, I don't have friends who would be likely to do that sort of thing, so that might be another reason to block Whatever the case may be, I thought that was strange. I did text back as soon as I received it saying "Pardon me?" No response from him (or whoever sent that message). I decided the best thing to do was to wait for an explination, but none came. So I blocked him. It's for the best.
Casablanca Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 OKC worked much better for me than POF. But anecdotes... Match was the worst for me, despite having to pay for it. Orchid, from your description I would have assumed that your correspondent's cell was abducted for a second and a 'friend' sent the message. Then I wouldn't expect to get an apology very soon because who knows how long it would take to notice that Then again, I don't have friends who would be likely to do that sort of thing, so that might be another reason to block I had more success on match, I found the quality of women on there (in my area) to be superior...OKC and POF seem to vary...as a guy though who isn't crazy, not looking just for sex, etc...sounds like I'm a rare commodity!
BluEyeL Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 I've been on OKC for three days only and met three people for dates. But the quality of the people on match is much higher, on average.
Casablanca Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 I've been on OKC for three days only and met three people for dates. But the quality of the people on match is much higher, on average. What? Met as in have been chatting back and forth, or after only 3 days you've met in person 3 people??!!
BluEyeL Posted May 22, 2013 Posted May 22, 2013 What? Met as in have been chatting back and forth, or after only 3 days you've met in person 3 people??!! Yes, after three days I've met in person 3 people. OK, to clarify, I had my profile up for three days, it took a couple of weeks to go on all these dates. First date of all happened 3 days after closing my profile. Two of them I met twice, the third one I turned down for a second. One of them 10 yrs younger and hot lol I chatted with 6 or so. One cancelled the date, two poofed before setting one.
El Brujo Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Some people just don't get it. All of the people I know who really want to meet someone are doing the meetup thing and they're meeting good quality men and women to show for it. Weirdos never show up at the meetups. There's a new mentality among the meetup folks that OLD is turning into a place for basket cases. 1
BluEyeL Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 Some people just don't get it. All of the people I know who really want to meet someone are doing the meetup thing and they're meeting good quality men and women to show for it. Weirdos never show up at the meetups. There's a new mentality among the meetup folks that OLD is turning into a place for basket cases. I'm going to a meetup next Tu. But I have to drive 1h for these....
El Brujo Posted May 23, 2013 Posted May 23, 2013 I'm going to a meetup next Tu. But I have to drive 1h for these.... Ya know what? For a good group, it's worth it.
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