joeysurveyor Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Been looking for a place to discuss my love for my wife, not divorced yet, been separated 6 years, I had to move from the city where we lived for 30 years, did not want to see her dating, about a month later she decided to quit her job and come to the same location, a island, I paid all her bills, give he money to spend until she found a job, took 4 years to find a job. she moved back in with me for a year in 2008, but she had started drinking and coming in all time of the night and I asked her to leave could not live like that, she moved from friend to friend for about a year until she moved in with this man, stupid me even when she was living with his man I was still giving her money, we talked almost every day and still do, we eat together sometime, she counts on me for everything helping with her activities or about anything she needs done. now this has been going on for 6 years, asked her several times did she want a divorce and she does not. I still love her very much not able to get over her since we are constant in touch with each other, I bought a new car last month and gave that to her, now the apartment behind my house has become vacant and she wants to move into it, leave her boyfriend, I am so confused, I don't know what to do anymore, would leave if I could but have setup a business and do not want to close it down right now. like to hear somebody comments whether they are positive or negative.
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 simple answer. you are confused because shes lieng. if she were honest would you be confused. i dont think honesty holds to confusion. first are you really in love with your wife. stop. your answer is yes but lets run over the situation. you want someone to love you. you dont love yourself enough. im not trying to be mean at all. my friend, if you have been seperated for six years where is your wifes love. ill tell you whats going on shes holding on to both sides of the stick to figure out which breaks first. shes keeping you around incase she beilieves her boyfriend isnt someone to love. dont you see the hypocrisy in her. shes treating you wrongly but expects someone else to treat her well. what you have done doesnt mean much. it hurts right now. im over my ex-wife and it was a journey to SELF-recovery. self love but not self-falling in love. realizing im important i NEEDED A WOMEN WHO COULD BE A WIFE. and that wasnt her. you deserve good things. you deserve to figure out your emotions and your feelings and honestly i hope you see the light. life is precious. as i have said love is a warm place. she is giving you the cold shoulder. any kids? i need to know some things to meet the criteria on how to handle your situations. IE. mortgage. Kids. Seperation agreement details. IF YOU HAVE TEXTS WHERE SHE SAYS SHE HAS A BOYFRIEND. thats called court-ammo bud and thats something you will need. Understand this friends a women who doesnt want a divorce who has a boyfriend - wants a divorce. bud that is going to hurt but dont let it. YOU ARE TOO IMPORTANT AND YOU SHOULD TELL YOURSELF YOU ARE! dont ever and i mean ever let someone downgrade what you mean to yourself because if they see that you dont love yourself enough they will use you if they are that type of person. is that really your wife, a wife? ask yourself harder questions. and love yourself. you are you. wonderfull. and guess what there is a women who will say that and mean it. two things my phrase. someone who doesnt think you are right for them isnt right for you. second, move on because you need to love yourself if she doesnt get her act toghether. take care of you. know yourself. be yourself and guess what a women who is attracted to that wont do what shes doing. will be back and will write more but you stand up to her and make an ultimatum because you can. Understand this people YOU CAN make an ultimatum and say yes this is for me or isnt if someone is doing the wrong thing and abusing what should be a healthy, honest relationship grounded in fidelity. honestly bro she has emotionally moved on from you or she wouldnt even have another man. you are filed under " for later use" if that hurts to hear you havent heard me. YOU DESERVE BETTER. NOT TO HURT BUT TO BE LOVED SO START LOVING YOURSELF! and the gray clouds go away. there will be a new women in your life. the pain the hurt the guilt will be gone. we all make mistakes but people who love us dont make larger ones blame us for ours and make us feel it! get your life back and today! and if she wants part in it thats fine but if not you cant force someone to love you but you can find someone who will. END OF STORY AND THATS BETTER BECAUSE I DONT WANT YOU TO BE HURTING! and another women wont either!
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 let me tell you something about good women and let me say this first THEY ARE RARE. we as men get lonely. thats a fact. we as men get use to and conditioned to familiarity with other people. expecially the people we live with because we think in that home we are safe and where we need to be. but life teachs us, people who we learn from and great lessons of and in pain. but you will come out stronger either way. let me say something more important than anything else i will say to you at all and this needs to sink it. read it a hundred times if you have to. YOU NEED TO BE CAREFULL. stop. thats what you need to do. you are stuck chasing this women all over the hills while shes running enjoying being chased and spending her time and effort on her own life. im sorry for such a deep pain that you must feel. i pray that pain will soon leave you. but enough talking about pain. THE GREATEST THING A MAN CAN DO WHEN HES THINKING ABOUT ANOTHER WOMEN WHO IS DOING HIM WRONG IS THIS. 1. STOP FOCUSING ON HER AND FOCUS ON YOURSELF. 2. BUILD A SOCIAL NETWORK which can become buisness related later. 3. CONTINUE TO FOCUS ON YOURSELF AND GROW HER CURIOUSITY WILL GROW IN WHY SHES NOT GETTING ATTENTION. that type of person seeks attention. negative good sad bad mad it doesnt matter. if attentions on them they are validated. you are a play piece but guess what YOU REALLY ARENT. your a human being, filled with your own emotions and need to be nurtured loved and cared for. psychologically physically and financially. now more about good women and a good woman. A good women will not complain about the choice she made to be with someone. that should be the women you want and you should mean a great deal to her. a good women is someone who also listens to you as you listen to her. listens to the way she hurts you and feels responsible to making you feel better. THATS CALLED CARE. in a good women her mind is telling her she doesnt want to hurt the man she loves and SHE messed up. a bad women convinces you or trys to that your feelings are your imagination. HOW DOWNRIGHT EVIL. marginalizes EVERYTHING YOU ARE. that is a women who will destroy you while you let her. thats cold blooded. thats called tearing the dolls head off and watching in pleasure the pain you have caused. thats called bad women. a good women cooks cleans and does everything she can commit to the relationship FOR YOU! WITHOUT COMPLAINT. without ever saying its too much. i cook i clean and i do laundry. what when someone else is living with me thats too much? HA WHAT A BUTTHEAD ID BE! a good women loves you. wants you to enjoy sex with her but only with her. a good women is thoughtfull. concerned. appreiciative, a good women is a GOOD WOMAN. you need to realize something and at YOUR OWN PACE. you are amazing. You need to love your mistakes because they show you who you are suppose to be and how to get there. you need to love your scars because in every scar you save someone from their own. you need to be you. to love you and to be happy with yourself and so does someone else. GOOD WIVES DONT HAVE BOYFRIENDS. good wives dont make you the play-thing. GOOD WIVES ARE A WIFE FIRST AND FORMOST TO THE MAN THAT SLAYS DRAGONS FOR HER. good wives are supportive. good wives stay at home because they only have one. Good wives tell you that you are a good husband. thats what good wives do. and there are women out there. dont share a home with someone who doesnt understand this. You are inviting in pain, lies and deceit and you are also inviting in someone who will destroy your hard work. you are inviting in what will take your life from you. turn it upside down and laugh. remember BE CAREFULL. assert yourself and be happy most of all.
carhill Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 I would suggest getting some counseling to better understand why you apparently need or desire her agreement to get a divorce, as well as to focus more on yourself and what's healthy for you. Welcome to LS
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 take this into consideration. you cant force someone to love you but you deserve love. even if you could, would you really want to? you are trying so hard. be proud of yourself but know your feeding a black whole. it exists for itself to suck you dry of any good work you can do. is that what you really want. is that what you truely love. i think you really deep down just want to be loved and are trying to show her why she sould love you. i wont say you havent fallen in love but with who really? someone who is doing what to you. when you could find a women who loves you. who only looks your direction. a women who has no problem putting a smile on your face and tugging at your heart to bring you to a place where she shares her good times and makes them BOTH OF YOUR GOOD TIMES TOGHETHER. man good women dont have a problem loving you because they are loving. just ask yourself is loving someone like this, truely honestly worth the effort made. and there you will find a couple of things. the truth. you will find yourself and you will find out who you want and need to be and what someone needs to be to and for you. look deep. be honest and you will have allll of your answers. six years is a long time and to want someone youve been living seperate from. i just dont want to see you hurt. reember this once shes gone shes gone why would you spend your own life sad she left instead of finding someone who is happy to be with you or would be had you not chose misery and chose to find that person who you can call wife. remember time waits for no one, but time also will lead you in the right direction. what will happen will happen but your life is full of the choices that make it your own. peace be with you friend on all you are going through. i hope you find out you truely will be ok because you have yourself and you fill the pages of your life with the pen you use to write it. your choices. take care and update me.
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 take this into consideration. you cant force someone to love you but you deserve love. even if you could, would you really want to? you are trying so hard. be proud of yourself but know your feeding a black whole. it exists for itself to suck you dry of any good work you can do. is that what you really want. is that what you truely love. i think you really deep down just want to be loved and are trying to show her why she sould love you. i wont say you havent fallen in love but with who really? someone who is doing what to you. when you could find a women who loves you. who only looks your direction. a women who has no problem putting a smile on your face and tugging at your heart to bring you to a place where she shares her good times and makes them BOTH OF YOUR GOOD TIMES TOGHETHER. man good women dont have a problem loving you because they are loving. just ask yourself is loving someone like this, truely honestly worth the effort made. and there you will find a couple of things. the truth. you will find yourself and you will find out who you want and need to be and what someone needs to be to and for you. look deep. be honest and you will have allll of your answers. six years is a long time and to want someone youve been living seperate from. i just dont want to see you hurt. reember this once shes gone shes gone why would you spend your own life sad she left instead of finding someone who is happy to be with you or would be had you not chose misery and chose to find that person who you can call wife. remember time waits for no one, but time also will lead you in the right direction. what will happen will happen but your life is full of the choices that make it your own. peace be with you friend on all you are going through. i hope you find out you truely will be ok because you have yourself and you fill the pages of your life with the pen you use to write it. your choices. take care and update me. also giving her stuff wont bring her back you need to realize your a good man. get the car back. do it. but first you have to identify issues that may prevent the return of your property. have you signed it over to her in her name? if not it is yours. asking for it to be returned is not wrong. you paid for it, thats called a right to property and a verbal authorization of use of property does not entitle a legal claim to be considered a right to property.( it simply suggests an agreement of use that can be terminated by the initiater of the agreement based on the fact he has a legal claim by right of property) property description is everything. if your names on it and its owned its yours to do whatever with. if she refuses the rquest and you have trouble, try asking a lawyer/solicitor to send a letter of affirmation that affirms she has no legal right to the property. if nescesarry you can file in family court. if you signed it over to her there is such a thing as legal-fiction but the wording would have to be absolutely correct and on such grounds you were emotionally unable to make a decision at the time wherby a loss of property resulted and is therby subject to be returned to the individual who incurred the loss. the grounds would have to clearly suggest without doubt to them that since you made a emotionally based decision it violates -inserts something- your ability to have given the property in the right state of - insert reason-. i cant even think right now. there are alot of things we can do here. but you have to ready and able and see where what your doing is helping her and that you are failing who most needs you right now, yourself. probably improper ability and good judgement to make decisions you would like that the car your purchased be returned in good faith. this could work emotionality has been portrayed as the opposite of rationality and/or effectiveness in a managerial setting which therefore dissallows a relatively neutral range by which you could have actually made the decision if by where we consider what a decision it is we understand it is not emotional and it is nuetral. but then the judge would laugh and say we cant make emotional decisions. you could argue that your point stands in face of itself and that emotional based decisions are not nuetral decisions and they detract from the ability to make right decisions or right decisions based on the circumstances portrayed in this situation and because or your wifes willingness to take advantage of your emotions as a benefit to her subjects that property need be returned since it was TAKEN ( see play on words) and not given and that it was gained through unscrupulous actions on part of your wife not resigning your offer ( if she has a car hit her now with that fact) and allowing you to rettain property purchased that you have a legal claim by right of property. so dude get that car back.
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 i added text to a post above. make sure you read the nescesarry legal language nescesarry to obtain your car again. im trying to help let me know.
Simpleoldschool Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 (edited) just say this " through your wifes demonstration of guilty conscience her willingness to take advantage of you by accepting a car not as a gift clearly suggests "mens-ria" ".( at this point the judge will know exactly what your talking about and the lawyer will be absolutely uncomfortable without counter claim due to disposition of the argument if she can even afford a lawyer) then go into the emotional crap i told you. you will get that car back. first keep your buisness going. theres nothing that will screw you more than fileing bankruptcy consider your life over for a good 15-20 years if not indefinately. you wont be able to rent or get any line of credit without a guarenteed almost 50% interest rate or something ridiculous and then if unpaid Jail-time. i only say fifty percent because anyone who approved you...well they wouldnt. fileing bankruptcy means no funds avalible to pay off the insurmountable dept. which means no new access to credit which means no meny to purchase which means again no renting and the list gos on. you might aswell go rob a bank LMAO! i can help you if YOU WANT ME TO. dude the way this woman has treated you, i would sue the pants off of her- literally. what shes doing is abusive. i can think of a more few things in my sleeve or tricks and magic if you need them and want them. if you want i can make sure you own everything she does hahahahahaha. legal language is funny because in LAW 9/10's of the law is verbage and 1/10 of the law is actual reality. let me know how i can provide services needed. also please tell me that your inability to cohabitate with your wife due to a strain of alchohalism is in your seperation agreement for higher level ammo. tommow i will be working on a suit for return of property loss/lost due to blah blha blah. ill type it up and write it on the post. haha dont worry it will be without spelling errors. also once a women makes the decision to leave what miracle decision do you beilieve they will come to, to come back? shes already resolved within her solve a reason to leave and it is NOT because of anything you did. its because of whats shes doing TO you. You are a great person you have so many things. Abuisness how wonderfull. take that dream off into the future with you. there are always women and if you say not like her, you may be right. some women might actually have lived with you the six years you were seperated from this one. Edited May 18, 2013 by Simpleoldschool
Simpleoldschool Posted May 19, 2013 Posted May 19, 2013 (edited) NOTICE FOR RETURN OF PROPERTY[/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]Property in question: { insert property title here}[/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]Property holder: { insert name here }[/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]Purchaser of property: { insert your name here}[/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]Title in name of property: { insert name on title of property in question}[/sIZE][/FONT] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] Let it be known that on the date of ___ , of this month in ____, on this day of ____ and this year being ______ property belonging to me (insert name is capital letters) is requested to be returned to issuer of property not having deligated property over in title of name. I am requesting property be returned to me { insert name in caps} by {insert name in caps} for the following reasons. Right by claim to propertyRight by claim as sole owner of propertyOn the dates mentioned above, I {state name} released the use of property to { insert name } with the intention of good faith of its use, however having understood the gravity and sense in which the property was given and in due response to an unfortunate mistake { insert her name here} accepted the use of my property while withholding to a standard of good faith. It is my beilief that she willfully took property in a state of guilty conscience understanding such the property could not be given so much as it was taken and not denied Since the property had been released for use and only use I wish to assume the property back as full owner and to full right of the property without use of anyone other than myself I also feel as if the user vitiated my intent based on these claims taking advantage of use of property while I was not in a clear mental state of mind to give it. This suggests {state her name } was in a state and sense of mind of mens-ria that due to the emotionally overwhelming state of mind I was due to the unfortunate events that I had to endure because of the way her laboring decisions effected me that I could not have given the right of use of [FONT=Times New Roman][sIZE=3]emotionality has been portrayed as the opposite of rationality and/or effectiveness in making decisions in an appropriate setting which therefore dissallows a relatively neutral range by which I could have actually made the decision if by where we consider what a decision is we understand it is not fully-emotional and it is somewhat neutral given but fully mentally recognizeable thereunto the neutral state of truths being the right of property by husband and wife which “ state her name” was not acting in the full capacity of wife and cannot receive thereforeto since such a decision was not fully mentally recognizeable by to myself being a fully emotionally-related decision[/FONT][/sIZE] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] Therefore the decision for me to make a comfortable neutral decision in which { insert her name here} was acting as my property as { insert marital status}[sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman]It is that I pray upon these truths to be recognized and property be returned to issuer on title of property and I wish to claim by right of property that which is mine and that it be recognized that which is not hers.[/FONT][/sIZE][sIZE=3][FONT=Times New Roman] [/FONT][/sIZE] {insert you name here} X._____________________ ß-- signature block well it doesnt show up as nice in word as it does here. anyways have a lawyer review this and proof read it for errors and make legal corrections. then send this to her. she she ignores, then make sure that you note that when you go to court. to make sure she ignored it send a letter in the mail certified which requires a signiture. hope this helps. Edited May 19, 2013 by Simpleoldschool
Recommended Posts