Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 wow, I am afraid that my list of what I want in a future partner will be too strict!!!!!! Help! And YES this is for the DISTANCE future, well over a year from now! AFTER regular therapy to help me to find myself and deal with my past demons.... BE HONEST: tell me if my list is too strict! - I do not need a man who is good looking, rich, or college educated (although he needs to have a love and interest in many topics if he is a tradesmen or truck driver or blue collar) - I need to be attracted to him somewhat, even if he starts out average looking at first; true love causes me to view them as super hot as I start to fall for them. - I have become highly attracted to average looking men once I fell for them - I do not want kids - I want to travel a LOT and I do not want to spend my life with a person who is not highly curious to see and experience the world - I would rather be alone for ten years, than settle for a man who is anything less than : totally crazy about me, and who I feel the same way about - I want us both to maintain that happy feeling when we see each other; if I walk into the room after 3 years, I want him to still light up and be happy to see me. NOT every day lol., but you know what I mean.... - A guy who is not the type to freely give his love and adoration to just ANY girl! I loved how my ex called me beautiful and gorgeous and darling and sweetie, when he DID NOT do that with other girls; he saves that shyte for women he really likes or loves - a guy who likes to give oral sex LOL - a guy who is affectionate - a guy who does not have 2sshole friends who try to tell him that I am not hot enough for him:mad::mad: Or anything lame like that ........................................................................... Is this list going to be THAT hard to find one day? ............................................................................. About me: - average looking but enough men out there find me to be attractive I am not attractive to every one, but there are enough men who do find me very attractive, even though I am average to most people I am guessing) - good body, I eat right and work out; I like big meals and long walks, I am not going to starve myself to be model size, yet I genuinely enjoy a daily jog and 2 days strength work at he gym to maintain the integrity of my bones and muscles - I have a slim but curvy body type, not super skinny but very curvy and slim looking - I have very light blonde hair and I feel I will always be a blonde LOL< and light blue grey eyes - a slightly long nose but it looks straight and normal from the front view, and only looks bad from the side - I am getting a nose job anyways - nice teeth - nice skin - friendly and positive - completing a degree that will pay me an average wage, and guarantee me a job pretty much, and will allow me to work overseas if we so wish - my field is all about helping people who need it the most. It is not law or business or anything that makes me look super intelligent or impressive. But it is my passion which is all that matters to ME. - I stand out because I love my fashion sense and love just existing really, I love life. - repeat: I am a very grateful women, I read a lot of books on people who have gone through adversity and I truly appreciate how lucky I am on a daily basis - I love dogs ...................................................................................... I know I have to match up to what I am seeking in a man! I am loyal, friendly, and treat the guy I love very well. I am not the hottest girl around, but there are enough guys who do find me very attractive, and I do not doubt I will be able to find a guy who is attracted to me ( even though many won't be) I am in therapy for my issues, which I am aware of. I do not stalk/call like crazy/ act like a psycho outwardly, it is only after time that my issues come to light, when I choose to not deal with them. By the time I have moved on from my ex and got regular therapy, I am pretty confident I will be past he issues that hold me back in a relationship. ...........................................................................
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 And please, NO TROLLS who tell me I am too ugly and that I do not have enough going for me to find a decent and interesting man. I will just report you and add you to my blocked list. BE HONEST but not awful. I am willing to lower my standards one day if I stay, you know... single for many years with no prospects!
Roadkill007 Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 this sounds extremely.... normal. and should be easily within the realm of possibility. Guys like that aren't that rare.... just aren't as easy to spot out in a crowd or they're taken I know what you mean though. I'd rather be alone than not having that type of loving relationship. Even if it means I'll be alone till I die, I'll wait.
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 Same! Ugh I don't want to EVER settle because I just cannot find a guy who is crazy about me, and also does not want kids and who likes travel.
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 Yes I hope it is not too hard to find! It would suck if I cannot find a guy who doesn't want kids and stuff... I am not worried, I am just saying that it would suck to be alone forever lol.
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 yeah the idea of having little brats to spend all my time and money and energy on, instead of traveling and living it up and helping charities with my money, is just really depressing to me lol. I really dislike the idea of kids, yet I do not hate being around kids at all... But you know... I like being around them, and giving them back haha. DO many men also hate the idea of kids?
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 (edited) I would get with a guy with bad teeth! I did really like that my ex had straight teeth, as I do..... My first long term partner had horrible teeth. Probably why I was never as attracted to him as I was to my ex:( I mean, I am no super model myself, but I would prefer a man to have straightened teeth. IF he has a full time job then surely they would find correcting a terrible smile important? But yes. I would fall for a guy if he was wonderful and had bad teeth. I look for personality and how they make me laugh, the love for travel and no kids first, WAY before I would care about them having goods teeth. Edited May 18, 2013 by Leigh 87
PCS991 Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Okay to condense that a bit, you want a guy that: - likes you - isn't an a-hole - doesn't want kids - likes to travel - like to eat you out Shouldn't be too hard to find. Alrighty then.... I had no idea this forum was so.....
Roadkill007 Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 DO many men also hate the idea of kids? Well, I dunno about "men" in general, but I'd like to raise kids. I mean, I know it'll be thankless hard work for the most part, but you only live once, and I'd love to experience what it's like to be a father. Only part I'm really wary about is that once you have kids, time'll just fly, yknow? One day, your first child is born, another day, your last child has left the home, and suddenly you're 30 years older I've known guys who'd prefer not having to deal with kids though. w/e floats everyone's boats, yea?
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 18, 2013 Author Posted May 18, 2013 I dunno, I can see how kids are everything to some people. I do not think they are less happy than childfree couples, nor do I think childfree couples are any more happy than those with kids. It just isn't for me I guess. Those with kids or who want kids would think of how lonely it would be to grow up without kids to look after you when your older, and how not having anyone when your old would be awful. For me though, I find that I just have so much love for the men I fall in love with.. there is so much I love exploring with them, without having the need to introduce that other level, aka kids. I am strongly averse to kids though, so I would probably not compromise there! I want to build a loving relationship one day and focus 100% on that, without the burden of kids. For some reason, to me, giving my life away to a kid is a death sentence. It is funny how some people cannot imagine a life without kids, where as others like me just hate the idea!
sillyanswer Posted May 18, 2013 Posted May 18, 2013 Your 3-year thing is the only problem on your tick list because you'll never have a tick in that box after the first date. You have to take a risk on that one. 1
Author Leigh 87 Posted May 19, 2013 Author Posted May 19, 2013 I am at the age where I have missed the boat for kids. I have been lazy in life and will be about 30 when I finish my degree. Therefore, I will save and travel once a year with my professional job, and probably not get my fix until at LEAST mid to late 30's. I also want to afford botox and a nose job. Since I would rather spend my money on sheltering abandoned dogs than kids, I do not really think I will EVER chance my stance on kids. I would not want to give up my dreams in life to get a guy who wanted kids; I may not work long term with the guy and then I am stuck in a life I never wanted, aka , KIDS and NO money for myself! ................................ This is why I am going to do online dating once I am back from overseas in late July: it weeds out a lot of men who have different goals in life to your own. Late July should be enough time for me to have started to move on from my ex enough for me to start dating others.
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