Phoebe Posted May 20, 2013 Posted May 20, 2013 Personally Mackie I think that you are dealing with the situation really well, it's an awkward place to be in but I think it will get better with time. Your boyfriend is not always going to be living with his parents and eventually you'll end up building your own relationship with his family. I agree with Smoocherific, if you can, try and see her as a cousin. My boyfriend's best friend also happens to be his ex-wife's brother. I was so nervous the first few times I met him, I kept thinking that he would be judging me against his sister. Now two years on it's not a big deal at all. True I've never met his ex-wife so my situation was a lot easier than yours but I think that the people warning you against your boyfriend and making it seem like you have no self-respect don't fully grasp all of the aspects of your particular situation. The fact that his ex lost both her parents at age 13 is a huge part of why your boyfriend's family is still an active part of her life. I lost my father when I was 16 and my mother when I was 25, and I can't imagine how devastating it would have been like to have lost them both just as you're entering your teenage years. This is not just a regular story about how an ex won't go away. You sound like you have a good boyfriend whom you trust and it sounds like his family are great people, people who you would be lucky to have as in-laws one day (if that's what you want). No one is denying that it's an awkward situation, and it's not one that everyone could handle, but you seem to have a good head on your shoulders and I do think that this awkward stage will pass given time. Good luck
Author Mackie Posted May 21, 2013 Author Posted May 21, 2013 Personally Mackie I think that you are dealing with the situation really well, it's an awkward place to be in but I think it will get better with time. Your boyfriend is not always going to be living with his parents and eventually you'll end up building your own relationship with his family. Thank you I agree with Smoocherific, if you can, try and see her as a cousin. My boyfriend's best friend also happens to be his ex-wife's brother. I was so nervous the first few times I met him, I kept thinking that he would be judging me against his sister. Now two years on it's not a big deal at all. True I've never met his ex-wife so my situation was a lot easier than yours but I think that the people warning you against your boyfriend and making it seem like you have no self-respect don't fully grasp all of the aspects of your particular situation. The fact that his ex lost both her parents at age 13 is a huge part of why your boyfriend's family is still an active part of her life. I lost my father when I was 16 and my mother when I was 25, and I can't imagine how devastating it would have been like to have lost them both just as you're entering your teenage years. This is not just a regular story about how an ex won't go away. You sound like you have a good boyfriend whom you trust and it sounds like his family are great people, people who you would be lucky to have as in-laws one day (if that's what you want). No one is denying that it's an awkward situation, and it's not one that everyone could handle, but you seem to have a good head on your shoulders and I do think that this awkward stage will pass given time. thanks, yeah that's exactly it - that's why i'm not mad at him or his family, or even her, I do get it, I get it that there kind of the only family shes got. Tbh I don't really trust her but I do trust my boyfriend and that's the important thing!
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