Girl called me "beautiful", what is the next move

[Pompeii]

I was at a bar this past weekend. The year is winding down. It was another night for me, I saw it as just another time to go and hang out with friends and drink away the stresses of the week. As I was walking around, I saw this girl who I have a mega crush on. She was talking to her friend and she saw me and then instantly shouted my name. Then she hugged me tight (first time she's ever done that) and said "you're beautiful". Then, I reflexively said the same back. Then her friend disappeared and we were talking for 20 minutes or so. For some reason, talking to her was pretty natural and we got a good rapport going on. There was also a lot of physical contact, I was the one who initiated it and then we both had our hands on each other's backs. I was switching between that and the shoulder. Conversation-wise, I tried to switch it up between being serious and being playful. Like I said, for some reason it was really easy for me to talk to her even though I have a crush on her. I was going to talk to her more, but my friend got really wasted and I had to take him home.

 

But I'm now wondering if she will go cold on me. I was also wondering if I should follow up and what should my next move be. Also the third thing I was wondering is if girls ever call guys "beautiful" at all. That's a weird thing to hear coming from a girl but maybe its a compliment? I hope? I'm just afraid that she was just being nice and all of it was just a ruse.

[USMCHokie]

I hope? I'm just afraid that she was just being nice and all of it was just a ruse.

 

I could have been the alcohol talking.

 

Either way, did you get her number and will you call her and ask her out...?

[Pompeii]

I could have been the alcohol talking.

 

Either way, did you get her number and will you call her and ask her out...?

 

I don't know... Her first drink at the bar was with me. She might have pregamed before. She didn't seem that drunk to me. Maybe tipsy. I have her number but I'm not gonna ask her out unless I know that she's into me without a doubt.

[HuffmanMontana]

I don't know... Her first drink at the bar was with me. She might have pregamed before. She didn't seem that drunk to me. Maybe tipsy. I have her number but I'm not gonna ask her out unless I know that she's into me without a doubt.

 

Good things don't always come easy...

[normal person]

Some girls calling you beautiful/gorgeous might do it as a playful, flirty thing. It's certainly not bad although I wouldn't necessarily consider that a definite sign of interest if you guys are friendly already. Sometimes it's just a fun gesture.

 

I have her number but I'm not gonna ask her out unless I know that she's into me without a doubt.

 

Yeah, make her put herself out there because you're too afraid to do it yourself. This is the kind of confidence that women love.

[todreaminblue]

I was at a bar this past weekend. The year is winding down. It was another night for me, I saw it as just another time to go and hang out with friends and drink away the stresses of the week. As I was walking around, I saw this girl who I have a mega crush on. She was talking to her friend and she saw me and then instantly shouted my name. Then she hugged me tight (first time she's ever done that) and said "you're beautiful". Then, I reflexively said the same back. Then her friend disappeared and we were talking for 20 minutes or so. For some reason, talking to her was pretty natural and we got a good rapport going on. There was also a lot of physical contact, I was the one who initiated it and then we both had our hands on each other's backs. I was switching between that and the shoulder. Conversation-wise, I tried to switch it up between being serious and being playful. Like I said, for some reason it was really easy for me to talk to her even though I have a crush on her. I was going to talk to her more, but my friend got really wasted and I had to take him home.

 

But I'm now wondering if she will go cold on me. I was also wondering if I should follow up and what should my next move be. Also the third thing I was wondering is if girls ever call guys "beautiful" at all. That's a weird thing to hear coming from a girl but maybe its a compliment? I hope? I'm just afraid that she was just being nice and all of it was just a ruse.

 

i have met a few beautiful guys in my life......its where their heart shines through.......and its captivating.....beauty is not feminine in every instance......dont take it as an insult i doubt it was meant as one.......and.....ask her out,you should in my opinion....best wishes.....deb

[KungFuJoe]

I don't know... Her first drink at the bar was with me. She might have pregamed before. She didn't seem that drunk to me. Maybe tipsy. I have her number but I'm not gonna ask her out unless I know that she's into me without a doubt.

 

This is a winning attitude if I've ever seen one.

[ThaWholigan]

Don't worry about her "going cold on you". The more you marinade on it, the more likely you will put yourself under pressure and it will hurt more if she does happen to "go cold" on you.

 

Her calling you beautiful can mean a lot of things, but when some girls do this, it is typically ambiguous - whether intentional or not. It's up to you to take the bait and see if she is actually interested. I'm guessing you're not too keen on putting yourself on the line but honestly......that's exactly what your next move should be. Don't overthink it either - try to recapture and continue the rapport you held on the night, see if you can get to see her in person again.

 

 

The IMPORTANT thing is to know this: if it doesn't work out the way you want, DON'T worry about it . Suck it up, chalk it up to experience, move on. Best advice I can give. When I used to get rejected at first, it hurt like a bitch and it took me a while before I could even talk to other girls.

[StanMusial]

I was at a bar this past weekend. The year is winding down. It was another night for me, I saw it as just another time to go and hang out with friends and drink away the stresses of the week. As I was walking around, I saw this girl who I have a mega crush on. She was talking to her friend and she saw me and then instantly shouted my name. Then she hugged me tight (first time she's ever done that) and said "you're beautiful". Then, I reflexively said the same back. Then her friend disappeared and we were talking for 20 minutes or so. For some reason, talking to her was pretty natural and we got a good rapport going on. There was also a lot of physical contact, I was the one who initiated it and then we both had our hands on each other's backs. I was switching between that and the shoulder. Conversation-wise, I tried to switch it up between being serious and being playful. Like I said, for some reason it was really easy for me to talk to her even though I have a crush on her. I was going to talk to her more, but my friend got really wasted and I had to take him home.

 

But I'm now wondering if she will go cold on me. I was also wondering if I should follow up and what should my next move be. Also the third thing I was wondering is if girls ever call guys "beautiful" at all. That's a weird thing to hear coming from a girl but maybe its a compliment? I hope? I'm just afraid that she was just being nice and all of it was just a ruse.

 

It's a compliment. You should ask her out. A girl called me a "beautiful man" one time and I know she was into me because her friend told me so. I took a pass on her though because of some other things her friend told me.

[Pompeii]

Yeah, make her put herself out there because you're too afraid to do it yourself. This is the kind of confidence that women love.

 

I never said she had to do that. I'm just saying that if I don't receive any more signs of interest, then I'm not proceeding. I know that if anything is to happen between us, I will have to pull the trigger. I also know that I have a certain window in which to do all of this. Attraction isn't eternal.

 

Also, I believe confidence is overrated. I have talked about this at length various times on this forum but I believe that confidence isn't the cure-all people think it is.

 

As I said, the main thing I'm afraid of is her going cold on me. I think I might have already left it too long now.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

I was at a bar this past weekend. The year is winding down. It was another night for me, I saw it as just another time to go and hang out with friends and drink away the stresses of the week. As I was walking around, I saw this girl who I have a mega crush on. She was talking to her friend and she saw me and then instantly shouted my name. Then she hugged me tight (first time she's ever done that) and said "you're beautiful". Then, I reflexively said the same back. Then her friend disappeared and we were talking for 20 minutes or so. For some reason, talking to her was pretty natural and we got a good rapport going on. There was also a lot of physical contact, I was the one who initiated it and then we both had our hands on each other's backs. I was switching between that and the shoulder. Conversation-wise, I tried to switch it up between being serious and being playful. Like I said, for some reason it was really easy for me to talk to her even though I have a crush on her. I was going to talk to her more, but my friend got really wasted and I had to take him home.

 

But I'm now wondering if she will go cold on me. I was also wondering if I should follow up and what should my next move be. Also the third thing I was wondering is if girls ever call guys "beautiful" at all. That's a weird thing to hear coming from a girl but maybe its a compliment? I hope? I'm just afraid that she was just being nice and all of it was just a ruse.

 

You definitely should have taken her home that night. Stop thinking so much.

 

Try to hit her up and see what happens. She might still respond.

[Pompeii]

You definitely should have taken her home that night. Stop thinking so much.

 

Try to hit her up and see what happens. She might still respond.

 

I couldn't take her home because I had to take my friend back who was too wasted. If I didn't, I seriously doubt he would have made it home.

[KungFuJoe]

So let me get this straight....

 

You have a crush on this girl.

 

She called you beautiful.

 

You talk with her all night and there's mutual physical contact.

 

And you say you won't do anything until you know there's definite interest.

 

Do you also stick your hand on a frying pan to make sure it's hot?

[Pompeii]

So let me get this straight....

 

You have a crush on this girl.

 

She called you beautiful.

 

You talk with her all night and there's mutual physical contact.

 

And you say you won't do anything until you know there's definite interest.

 

Do you also stick your hand on a frying pan to make sure it's hot?

 

Where did you not understand that I was trying to see if she wasn't being nice?

[KungFuJoe]

Where did you not understand that I was trying to see if she wasn't being nice?

 

Where did what?

 

Let me just put it as simply as possible....

 

You are blowing it big time. BIG TIME.

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

I couldn't take her home because I had to take my friend back who was too wasted. If I didn't, I seriously doubt he would have made it home.

 

The biggest reason for a lack of success is not failure. It's excuses.

[CryForNoOne]

Where did what?

 

Let me just put it as simply as possible....

 

You are blowing it big time. BIG TIME.

 

The irony is that this will be a self fulfilling prophecy. She is presumably attractive by the way he is building her up. She may be genuinely interested but women, unlike men, can lose interest very quickly. His window of opportunity may have already passed. If it hasn't, he will futz around a while longer and then she'll FZ him. Then he'll come back here and report she was not ever interested and was just being nice.

 

Frankly if you read these message boards long enough, you start to think it's a miracle the human race hasn't become extinct because it's the only species where the female gender has no interest in reproducing...

[Pompeii]

The biggest reason for a lack of success is not failure. It's excuses.

 

Are you kidding me? If my friend didn't need to be taken home, I certainly would have stayed longer and probed more. He was the only reason I didn't stay. That's not called an excuse, it's called being a good friend.

[Pompeii]

Where did what?

 

Let me just put it as simply as possible....

 

You are blowing it big time. BIG TIME.

 

If you say so, smart guy.

[CryForNoOne]

So let me get this straight....

 

You have a crush on this girl.

 

She called you beautiful.

 

You talk with her all night and there's mutual physical contact.

 

And you say you won't do anything until you know there's definite interest.

 

Do you also stick your hand on a frying pan to make sure it's hot?

 

I laughed out loud when I read this. Seriously, if what OP wrote is accurate, she Is very interested and it's painfully obvious...

[Lani]

Just ask her out.

 

If she's calling you beautiful, then she most likely means it.

I've called guys beautiful before, and you should absolutely take it as a compliment. It's better than her saying you're hot, or nice, or anything really. Beautiful covers so many bases.

 

You have her number.

You saw her out and she hugged you, then called you beautiful.

You talked easily for 20 minutes.

This talking included physical contact.

 

What more do you need? A freaking neon sign?

Make a move, she's done enough.

[SJC2008]

I would of been like of course I'm beautiful, Christinia Aguilera only wrote a song about me! lol

[HoneyBadgerDontCare]

Are you kidding me? If my friend didn't need to be taken home, I certainly would have stayed longer and probed more. He was the only reason I didn't stay. That's not called an excuse, it's called being a good friend.

 

No. I'm not kidding you.

 

He's an adult.

 

Yes, I've helped friends before and they've helped me when we were really drunk....but I never would expect a friend to lose out on a lay because of my over-indulgence. I would be insulted if a friend expected that of me.

 

Common courtesy, bro.

[BeholdtheMan]

Also the third thing I was wondering is if girls ever call guys "beautiful" at all. That's a weird thing to hear coming from a girl but maybe its a compliment?

You should've called her "handsome" and see how she responds

 

By the way, women are described as handsome in quite a few old novels

 

I believe confidence is overrated

Yes, and I believe the Earth is flat

 

OP...you don't win big in life by never taking risks

[Sunshine87]

Call her!! How on earth would you find out if she has an interest if you don't make a move.

 

Call her! She isn't telepathic. She can't read your mind. If you don't make a move, she probably won't. You're the guy, you're supposed to be the pursuer!

 

You need to be more proactive. You've given it a few days so that's cool. Fashionably late because you have many more girls on your mind ;-) .Call her and if you don't, forever hold your peace! You won't get any results if do not take the required action and you know this.

 

Call her or forever hold your peace and don't complain anymore.

Edited May 17, 2013 by Sunshine87