manders_01 Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 I have know Ed for about 18 months, he works in my regular bar. Always liked him as a friend, he's really a great guy, so kind. At the beginning of April we started FB messaging. Not full conversations but little messages and convos every once in a while. A couple of weeks ago, I had messaged him to make sure he was going to be at work that Saturday night. When I finally got to the bar, he had already gone. We messaged back and forth about it and then he says, "I have a confession, I was really looking forward to seeing you tonight" and I responded with the same. It was at that moment I realized that he and I liked each other, total light bulb moment. We were supposed to watch a basketball game on Monday night but he was feeling sick so we messaged during the game instead. We also messaged a lot on Tuesday. I finally did see him on Thursday night though he was working and we didn't chat much. But when he got home, he texted me that he needed to tell me some things and I should call him. We talked and he told me two very personal details that he prefaced with, "Before we go any further." Messaging and texting since then have been frequent. A week ago this past Saturday was my birthday outing that he was trying to join us but he unfortunately had to work all day and was beat. So I asked him if I could see him the next day. He said yes and we ended up going to the movies (which he treated for and the coffees beforehand). When we got back to my car he asked, "What's next?" and we ended up going to my place. We did not have sex just slept together. Monday was my birthday and I was supposed to go in to the bar to see him but he ended up having to babysit his niece and nephew. Wednesday I went to the ballgame, the ballpark a block away from the bar, but didn't go to the bar. He texted me barbing me about it. So Friday night I made a point to go to the bar to see him but when I got there he was already gone. Two weeks ago, the response to me asking where he was at was, "Just left I would have stayed sorry...I missed your beautiful smile and everything else I love about you" but this time I got, "Home already". We texted just a few times back and forth but I was admittedly ticked. I don't know that I really made it clear but I'm guessing he could have gleaned that from my texts. At that point I decided I could not be the one to contact him first. We have not spoken since but he has liked every FB post I've made or have been mentioned in. He's well aware of what's happening with me and seems to me to be interested. Sorry, I really was trying to keep this as short as possible but for just a little more background, I get sweet texts for him fairly regularly...sweet dreams, love; miss you; miss your smile; etc. and he has also made several very pointed comments about our future together. I cannot figure out where it is going or if it's going anywhere at all. I admit, I'm not good at playing it cool. I much prefer to just be in a relationship instead of dating. I'm not good at dating, I don't know if I even know how to do it. I'm sure there's a possibility I came on too strong but nothing stands out that I would think would make him pull back. I'm just at a loss and don't know what to do. I'm kinda feeling like if he hasn't contacted me by the game tomorrow (Bulls game which he's texted me before or during all the games in the past two weeks) that I need to ask to see him in person and politely discuss what his thoughts are on us. I don't want to be confrontational or defensive. I just want to know what his feelings are and know that I'm not wasting my time, that if I need to start getting over him that I do that. I understand you guys can't tell me what he's actually thinking or feeling but I wouldn't mind your thoughts on what may be going on.
PCS991 Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 Hi Manders, I just posted a kind of similar question. I'm a guy and I can't quite tell if its a slow go or no go with my situation. You women are so difficult to understand I wish you the very best outcome.
Author manders_01 Posted May 13, 2013 Author Posted May 13, 2013 Hi Manders, I just posted a kind of similar question. I'm a guy and I can't quite tell if its a slow go or no go with my situation. You women are so difficult to understand I wish you the very best outcome. LOL So are you guys! Wishing you the best as well!
happydate Posted May 13, 2013 Posted May 13, 2013 I have know Ed for about 18 months, he works in my regular bar. Always liked him as a friend, he's really a great guy, so kind. At the beginning of April we started FB messaging. Not full conversations but little messages and convos every once in a while. A couple of weeks ago, I had messaged him to make sure he was going to be at work that Saturday night. When I finally got to the bar, he had already gone. We messaged back and forth about it and then he says, "I have a confession, I was really looking forward to seeing you tonight" and I responded with the same. It was at that moment I realized that he and I liked each other, total light bulb moment. We were supposed to watch a basketball game on Monday night but he was feeling sick so we messaged during the game instead. We also messaged a lot on Tuesday. I finally did see him on Thursday night though he was working and we didn't chat much. But when he got home, he texted me that he needed to tell me some things and I should call him. We talked and he told me two very personal details that he prefaced with, "Before we go any further." Messaging and texting since then have been frequent. A week ago this past Saturday was my birthday outing that he was trying to join us but he unfortunately had to work all day and was beat. So I asked him if I could see him the next day. He said yes and we ended up going to the movies (which he treated for and the coffees beforehand). When we got back to my car he asked, "What's next?" and we ended up going to my place. We did not have sex just slept together. Monday was my birthday and I was supposed to go in to the bar to see him but he ended up having to babysit his niece and nephew. Wednesday I went to the ballgame, the ballpark a block away from the bar, but didn't go to the bar. He texted me barbing me about it. So Friday night I made a point to go to the bar to see him but when I got there he was already gone. Two weeks ago, the response to me asking where he was at was, "Just left I would have stayed sorry...I missed your beautiful smile and everything else I love about you" but this time I got, "Home already". We texted just a few times back and forth but I was admittedly ticked. I don't know that I really made it clear but I'm guessing he could have gleaned that from my texts. At that point I decided I could not be the one to contact him first. We have not spoken since but he has liked every FB post I've made or have been mentioned in. He's well aware of what's happening with me and seems to me to be interested. Sorry, I really was trying to keep this as short as possible but for just a little more background, I get sweet texts for him fairly regularly...sweet dreams, love; miss you; miss your smile; etc. and he has also made several very pointed comments about our future together. I cannot figure out where it is going or if it's going anywhere at all. I admit, I'm not good at playing it cool. I much prefer to just be in a relationship instead of dating. I'm not good at dating, I don't know if I even know how to do it. I'm sure there's a possibility I came on too strong but nothing stands out that I would think would make him pull back. I'm just at a loss and don't know what to do. I'm kinda feeling like if he hasn't contacted me by the game tomorrow (Bulls game which he's texted me before or during all the games in the past two weeks) that I need to ask to see him in person and politely discuss what his thoughts are on us. I don't want to be confrontational or defensive. I just want to know what his feelings are and know that I'm not wasting my time, that if I need to start getting over him that I do that. I understand you guys can't tell me what he's actually thinking or feeling but I wouldn't mind your thoughts on what may be going on. How friendly is he with you? Good friends? Perhaps he's just wanting to be friends with you and not willing to pursue an intimate relationship with you. He should be upfront with you if he's a secure man and not play any childish games with you, confusing you even more. I had women do this to me and I told them that I am just interested in being with friends and being authentic and honest, they respect me more. Why would you even want to date a guy like that? He's going to break your heart because he's just seeing himself and protecting himself, therefore perhaps he's working on some emotional issues by himself.
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